I've Upset my Mum :(

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Weddings & Anniversaries
23 replies 1.7K views
Sammy_GirlSammy_Girl Forumite
3.4K Posts
edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Weddings & Anniversaries
Hi Girls,

I feel really bad. I've just come off the phone and I've upset my mum. Basically my mum lives 200 miles away and I try to involve her as much as I can with the wedding stuff (she is doing all stationery, and helping me with cake and flowers). I saw her last weekend and she said she would come visit me in October, and I said that maybe we could look at dresses together.

Anyway, I chose and bought my dress last week and I told my mum today, and she was like "oh, I thought we were going together" and so I explained about the sale dresses and the dilemma I had, and then she was like " I could have come down at short notice to help you choose"

So now I feel really bad and feel like a really rubbish daughter and that I have let mum down. Please someone tell me what I can do to make it up to her? This sucks :(


  • When she comes in October could you both go and look for her dress??
  • I said that. And she was like "oh it's far too early to be doing that".

    I can't win :confused:

    I've emailed her a picture of my dress. Tomorrow I will post her a sample of the embroidery and a photo of the flower detail, so that she can incorporate those in the stationery design. I don't know what else to do??
  • McKneffMcKneff Forumite
    38.6K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    give your mum another ring and tell her how you feel, she really will appreciate it. and suggest what evans17 has said. If not both of you will not sleep tonight. let us know how you get on
    make the most of it, we are only here for the weekend.
    and we will never, ever return.
  • almar_2almar_2 Forumite
    393 Posts
    Send her some flowers with - I love you Mum - she will just melt.

    Quidco £196 - Voucher Codes £408 - GC Saved £603
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  • I would phone her but she's probably in bed now lol.

    I do like the flowers idea. Maybe I will send them tomorrow.

    Thank you.
  • Mums are like that. It's part of the realization that they have to let go. That's why the grab the first opportunity to do something for/with you. Don't be too hard on yourself, it's just how mums are!
  • aww hun have some ((((hugs)))) from me, Ive already upset my mum, dad and sister by only announcing I am getting married, so I do know how you feel :(

    Honestly chick try and not let it worry you, its not like you planned an exact date to go and pick dresses and then went behind your mums back, it sounds like it was just mentioned in the conversation. I am sure you will both feel better after you have slept on it.
    Little Miss Sparkles :A

    Team Reem - August '11 :cool:
  • Ok I've just ordered some flowers and they will be delivered on Tuesday. Co-incidentally they are the same colour that I want to use as my colour theme, so then I can call her Tuesday and we can discuss that.

    Will call her again tomorrow though.

    Thank you for the help
  • HoraceHorace Forumite
    14.4K Posts
    Try not to worry too much your Mum will come round. Mum's can be funny creatures at the best of times, I would ring her to tomorrow and suggest that you still meet up to buy shoes or a going away outfit. Its not too early to start looking for a dress or hat for your mum and I am sure you will have fun trying on lots of hats etc.

    I am glad that you found the dress of your dreams. Hope you have a fabulous day and your mum will come round its guaranteed.
  • Thank you for the replies, you're all a fab bunch :)

    I think the main problem is that my mum wasn't overly enthusiastic about us getting married in the first place and it's like she's sending mixed signals. It's not that she doesn't like H2B, she does. She doesn't believe in modern day marraiges, and my dad think people get married because it's "fashionable". Quite laughable really. Especially as they have been married for 40 years!!

    My mum said tonight that she thinks we're paying a lot of money for the wedding. But it is the wedding that H2B and I want. We are funding the wedding ourselves and I have not asked them for a penny, and I won't. When we bought our first house, they very kindly said that they would pay our deposit or pay for a wedding. We chose the deposit option, which we are extremely thankful for.

    On the one hand I get the impression that my mum isn't enthusiastic about the wedding, but on the other hand she gets upset that we didn't shop for dresses together????

    If I wasn't stressed before, now I am :confused:
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