My whole life has gone BANG

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
83 replies 10.8K views
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  • Thanks for your words.

    I just really do not want her to move out with the kids and it will destroy them, but she says she can not stay when her head is such a mess.

    We shall see what monday brings
  • Another day and still nothing. Odd txt but nothing clear, simple R U OK etc. from here
  • bank_of_slatebank_of_slate Forumite
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    There is someone on the debt free wannabee board in a very similar situation - read Kizzy wizzy wizzy's marriage over thread, if you post on there you will get lots of support as it's a very busy thread.
    ...Linda xx
    It's easy to give in to that negative voice that chants "cant do it" BUT we lift each other up.
    We dont count all the runners ahead of us & feel intimidated.
    Instead we look back proudly at our journey, our personal struggle & determination & remember that there are those that never even attempt to reach the starting line.
  • Gingham_RibbonGingham_Ribbon Forumite
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    I think she needs a proper break, one way or another. Some time to herself, or just with you maybe? If she insists on leaving while she works things through in her head, try to make her see that she should NOT take the children with her and it should probably not be with her mum. Enlist as much help as you can from friends and other family.

    I'm sorry for you all. I hope you all come out of it soon.
    May all your dots fall silently to the ground.
  • The kids are away currently but are back on Sunday and next week. So thats some of the hassle out the way

    She is staying with her cousin currently, but can not really affrd to stay in a hotel or go on holiday.

    She called round today out the blue, and we lay on the bed and talked for an hour and she cuddled in and went to sleep on me. But then she went back to her cousins. She did say we feel so right, and her heart is with me but her head is just confused.

    She seems to have good days and bad days from what I can see.

    She did say that she feels lost when she is with me, and if she was single she would have to do things again, as she does nothing when she is with me. As I do it all, get up with kids, pay bills, washing ironing etc. drop kids off etc.

    She also said she might be depressed, but she does not know.
  • Oh Needofhelp, this all sounds so very sad. It certainly seems that she may be depressed and a visit to the doctors sounds like a good idea. There is a depression support thread on the forum which may be worth a look at.

    This must be really hard for all of you.
  • Thanks, its killing me.
  • bank_of_slatebank_of_slate Forumite
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    Hi NOH,
    I hope you come back for support, how are things?
    ...Linda xx
    It's easy to give in to that negative voice that chants "cant do it" BUT we lift each other up.
    We dont count all the runners ahead of us & feel intimidated.
    Instead we look back proudly at our journey, our personal struggle & determination & remember that there are those that never even attempt to reach the starting line.
  • She came back on sunday night as the little one was due back then.

    she seemed abit better.

    went to doctors on monday, and is signed off with depression and refered to a counciller and was gave some anti depressents to take. (forgot the name) was seemed a bit better the last two days.

    but today she could not get out of bed and lay on the sofa till lunch time with a devet on her and the little one watching tv. saying she did not know if she was doing the right thing coming back.

    she took the little one out when i went back to work after lunch and said it was better to be out the house.

    I suppose its take each day as it comes.

    I have abooked a 2 week get away in 2 weeks time for us all, so that may help her relax abit.
  • nikki702nikki702 Forumite
    1.1K Posts
    You seem like a wonderful husband.. I hope it works out good for you all :o
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