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making a will cohabiting with our baby and he has two young children

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SavvyjjSavvyjj Forumite
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So - I am living with my fiancé and our 1 year old son, he has two children from a previous short relationship ages 5 and 6, the mother has no job or assets. Both myself and partner own our own homes, we now live in his house and I am selling mine this year. we want to make a will to protect everyone - my thoughts being I will have a decent sum of equity, my partner wants to split our assets three ways if anything happened to us both - i feel my son should have a larger portion as the boys have another parent... if something happened to one of us mirrored that all assets go to each other? any advice on what’s fair and simple? we plan to marry end of 2022 
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  • gettingtheresometimegettingtheresometime Forumite
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    Firstly be aware that your marriage will invalidate the will that you make now so either be prepared to redo it or ask if it can be made in anticipation of a marriage that far away.

    the question I'd ask you is do you see his older children as part of your family or do you see them as children you have to tolerate? Because if you see them as part of your family and you want a truly blended family, then the situation with their inheritance that they may or may not get from their mum is neither here nor there.
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  • MojisolaMojisola Forumite
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    Savvyjj said:
    So - I am living with my fiancé and our 1 year old son, he has two children from a previous short relationship ages 5 and 6, the mother has no job or assets. Both myself and partner own our own homes, we now live in his house and I am selling mine this year. we want to make a will to protect everyone - my thoughts being I will have a decent sum of equity, my partner wants to split our assets three ways if anything happened to us both - i feel my son should have a larger portion as the boys have another parent... if something happened to one of us mirrored that all assets go to each other?
    If you have mirror wills and he died first, you could change your will and leave everything to your son - doesn't he want to protect his first two children's interest?

  • SavvyjjSavvyjj Forumite
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    Mojisola said:
    Savvyjj said:
    So - I am living with my fiancé and our 1 year old son, he has two children from a previous short relationship ages 5 and 6, the mother has no job or assets. Both myself and partner own our own homes, we now live in his house and I am selling mine this year. we want to make a will to protect everyone - my thoughts being I will have a decent sum of equity, my partner wants to split our assets three ways if anything happened to us both - i feel my son should have a larger portion as the boys have another parent... if something happened to one of us mirrored that all assets go to each other?
    If you have mirror wills and he died first, you could change your will and leave everything to your son - doesn't he want to protect his first two children's interest?

    yes he does and likewise I would want them looked after, think he should have it equally split three ways for the three children - maybe mirrored is not best for our situation..
  • pphillipspphillips Forumite
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    Firstly be aware that your marriage will invalidate the will that you make now so either be prepared to redo it or ask if it can be made in anticipation of a marriage that far away.

    A will can't be made in anticipation of marriage unless the marriage is imminent, which it is unlikely to be under under the current circumstances.

    Have you thought about leaving your fiance an interest in your estate during his lifetime and then you get to decide what happens to it after he dies.
  • theoreticatheoretica Forumite
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    In the unlikely event that you both pass away who would look after your son?  The money would likely be needed for expenses of raising the children, more than as a lump sum for them to inherit at 18.  So two older children in one household, maybe do have less than double the need of a single child in another - but this would depend on who the likely guardians would be for your child.

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  • pickledonionspaceraiderpickledonionspaceraider Forumite
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    jbkmum said:
    But what if the other parent has no assets at all and then basically he doesn’t provide for his first two kids in the same way he’s providing for his third? I don’t see how having another parent factors in to it. I think HIS assets should be split three ways with his children. You can split yours however you want 
    This is exactly what I think too
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  • SavvyjjSavvyjj Forumite
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    I agree he needs to split his assets equally three ways and mine to my son. I was thinking of something happened to both of us my son would be without parents and go to next of mine whilst his other two would still be at home and provided for my there mum 
  • pickledonionspaceraiderpickledonionspaceraider Forumite
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    Savvyjj said:
    I agree he needs to split his assets equally three ways and mine to my son. I was thinking of something happened to both of us my son would be without parents and go to next of mine whilst his other two would still be at home and provided for my there mum 
    Totally fair.  IMO if he has a problem with this, he would be being unreasonable
    With love, POSR <3
  • Robin9Robin9 Forumite
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    Following on from Theoretica - who would look after your son. It may well be different people as your son gets older.
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