Money Moral Dilemma: Should my partner offer to lend me money?

tgroom57

My DD had this recently. She hadn't budgetted for (any) car repairs although she freely spends on other things. Tough, love.

moneyistooshorttomention

Also thinking "They're not a mind-reader" - so presumably think OP has enough money to cover it. My first thought for anyone saying "I need money for so-and-so" would be that I'd assume they'd put money to one side for it or, failing that, were planning to take out a loan for it.

But - as others state - we don't know the circumstances. We don't know what the money is required for/how much it is/whether OP is a good money-manager, but this is something that has hit totally out of the blue (eg having to pay some health care costs - because the NHS won't do so - and therefore not the OP's "fault" by any stretch of the imagination).

EDIT; Though, thinking of post above re car repairs - I wouldn't be expecting people to put money to one side for an expense that "shouldn't happen" and one would assume a car would keep going okay without that sort of expense (unless it was a very cheapskate "bought for £300 - and so you get what you pay for" sort of car).

Ozzuk

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

EDIT; Though, thinking of post above re car repairs - I wouldn't be expecting people to put money to one side for an expense that "shouldn't happen" and one would assume a car would keep going okay without that sort of expense (unless it was a very cheapskate "bought for £300 - and so you get what you pay for" sort of car).

Having an emergency fund I think is actually very sensible. Things do fail, on £300 cars to £30k cars, on houses, bikes, anything. If losing something has the potential to massively impact your life (can't get to work for instance, no car) then you should look to mitigate, whether that is emergency fund, insurance, warranty.

As an example, my lab cut her paw this week...£550 just before Christmas (and a mental note to sort her insurance!).

hazyjo

Impossible to answer without more info. There's no blanket rule, although generally I'd not really want to lend to anyone!

newwiseman

If you get annoyed at this I suggest you will have problems with a long term relationship. You can always ask but refusal may offend. I don't know your circumstances but if you are not the best at handling finances then you could be heading for a fall out with your partner.

REJP

As with other replies, insufficient information.
Does your partner know of your need?
Have you asked for help?
If your partner has enough cash to help then ask yourself why the offer is not forthcoming( having in mind the strength of your relationship).
Next step to get out of debt go to your local Citizens Advice Bureau where there are expert debt counsellors who can advise you, and I suggest you might also re-evaluate your relationship with your partner in the meantime.
As previously mentioned, we don't know if we are talking about a business partner or a live in love partner.
At least speak to whoever you owe the debt and arrange a repayment scheme, this is where CAB are experts. Please do not let it slide, it is not going to resolve itself by ignoring it. Please speak to your partner, do not let feelings about it fester until the relationship breaks down.

Ford34

All sorts of risks envolved and no guarantee they will pay the loan back. Every scenario in the world jumps up and screams NO. Even getting a legal agreement signed and wintnessed doesnt even guarantee repayment.
Stan

SandraX

Never lend money to anyone that you CAN'T afford to lose.

John_Gray

SandraX wrote: »

Never lend money to anyone [STRIKE]that you CAN'T afford to lose.[/STRIKE]

Fixed that for you...

It will end in tears whether you do or you don't.

crmism

I'm a bit unclear how many partners you currently have, and whether more than one has the money you want - you did, after all, state "they" rather than "him" or "her".

What makes you think your partner(s) should lend you any money at all? There is no binding relationship between you or agreement to repay. I think you would be better off applying for a bank loan or overdraft, as there's then no commitment either way between you if your relationship breaks down. Having a loan on which interest is charged is a good incentive to clear it as quickly as possible.