daughter bullying father

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My Brother a pensioner 3yrs ago sold up his house and moved to the town where his daughter lived in rented house, so that he would pay £120,000 to towards a house and she have the rest as a mortgage. It had a annex he could live in and share kitchen. He paid for new central heating, replaced all windows and doors did all the repairs in house cooked for them every day and was a taxi for her and the kids (3). Last year she changed the mortgage to a fixed and the to do this he had to sign over all the money he had paid into the house, did not seem a problem at the time. once he did this she started being really nasty towards him things. He had always paid the electric, gas and water. Amongst all the nasty things she doe she puts all the washes 10 at leat a week on 2hr washes everything goes in the tumble drier regardless of the weather, leaves the shower on as long as possible etc and the gas oven on, hence the bills have gone up, he requested she takes them over but tore the form up, only way he has been told that he is not responsible for the utilities is for him to leave the house, but no way can he afford to buy a house. Has anyone any ideas what he can do

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  • Jojo_the_Tightfisted
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    Not pay the utilities?


    And contact the council Adult Social Services, as this could be regarded as Elder Abuse.
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  • jordans_gran
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    utilities say he is libel if he stops paying as its in his name
  • Spendless
    Spendless Posts: 24,177 Forumite
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    What about him taking over the laundry of the household so he can control what wash goes on and how it's dried?

    My DH also does the same and it drives me nuts, but he claims the washing comes out too wet on a shorter cycle.

    Or get a different washing machine?
  • Gavin83
    Gavin83 Posts: 8,756 Forumite
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    utilities say he is libel if he stops paying as its in his name

    Cancel the utilities then.
  • jordans_gran
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    he kept turning off the tumble dryer so its now in her bedroom and she has a lock on the door. their relationship has totally broken down. he now turns the electric off at the mains then switches it back on when she is not in, so it stops the cycle, but she finds other ways to make his life hell.
  • kazwookie
    kazwookie Posts: 13,869 Forumite
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    In all honesty it reads as if he has been had by his daughter.

    As someone has already suggest it needs to be reported as abuse, the sooner the better.

    Can you help your brother do that as he sounds very vulnerable

    Was anything legal drawn up over the money and him living in the annex?

    The daughter could give him notice to go, and he wouldn't have a leg to stand on, and he would find himself homeless
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  • Fireflyaway
    Fireflyaway Posts: 2,766 Forumite
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    Sounds like a horrible situation. If the relationship has totally broken down and she tells him to leave, he could go to the council and maybe be housed. I'm not sure how things are in your area but here where I am, the council decreased the age for older people's housing because they couldn't fill it. Not the best situation but better than being made to feel unwanted and abused.
  • Ames
    Ames Posts: 18,459 Forumite
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    I agree with Jojo and Kazwookie. As I was reading the first post I was thinking 'abuse'.

    This could all get even messier if he needs to pay for care, or anything means tested. He could be treated as though he still had the money or share of the house.

    I think he needs more help than a forum can give.
    Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.
  • Mrs_pbradley936
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    He should go down the route of elder abuse to the extent that she tricked him out of his money. If the Council think that they have to pay for him to go into care they will sort it out. He really wants to have this investigated for deprivation of assets AND he needs to say it was all her doing:

    https://www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/care/paying-for-care/paying-for-a-care-home/deprivation-of-assets/
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