Leaving baby for 3 nights

Jay-Jay_4

We have to go away for 3 nights next month, leaving the baby (well she's 16 months now) with her Grandparents

She's stayed before twice for 1 night and has been fine (and she's going next week for a night) but does anyone have any tips on how to make sure that she's happy while she's there for a whole 3 nights?

She'll be taking her 'blanket' and her teddies from her cot, some toys and all the usual stuff (cups, dishes, spoons etc)

I was wondering whether to send a photo of us but as she's only young, that might upset her more as she won't know where we are.

Any tips appreciated

Spendless

Jay Jay-she'll be fine. Will the grandparents do the same routine as you do?

Are you sure it's not you that's upset?

I've only been away from eldest if I've been in hospital and was only away from the pair of them when I went to the Oldstyle meet in March

Jay-Jay_4

Spendless wrote:

Jay Jay-she'll be fine. Will the grandparents do the same routine as you do?

Are you sure it's not you that's upset?

I've only been away from eldest if I've been in hospital and was only away from the pair of them when I went to the Oldstyle meet in March

Thanks, just hearing 'she'll be fine' makes me feel better

My eldest (almost 6) stays with her real Dad overnight, every other week, so I'm used to her being away but I never left her at this age.

I'll be writing a few pages of instructions so that her routine is kept the same.

I just think to myself "what if she thinks I've abandoned her" she's too little to understand that I'll be coming back for her.

jellyhead

awww :-(
no real advice, i just wanted to send a hug *HUG*
chances are she will be fine, if routine is kept the same and she has teddies etc. with a familiar smell. make sure they know which songs you sing at bedtime, or if they can leave her or if you want them to stay until she falls alseep etc.

i didn't leave my son at this age but i think if i had i would have been more upset than he would have been lol! grandmas are very loving, most babies don't notice mums existence when gran is around

Jay-Jay_4

Thanks jelly

She's so easy really. She goes to bed at 6.30pm, all we say is "are you tired?", she's put her hand to the side of her head and then goes upstairs on her own. I follow her up, lift her into her cot and then leave her.

I suppose that I couldn't have done that with my eldest, she needed feeding to sleep, rocking etc and I wouldn't have ever let anyone else do it.

So it's not as if she'll be crying her eyes out at bedtime is it? That's a good thing I suppose isn't it? If she was difficult to settle than that would make it a lot more upsetting for her wouldn't it?

jellyhead

sounds like you've done a great job with her i plan to do the same with my baby, with my first i rocked and feb him to sleep, let him sleep in my bed, etc. so he would have been really upset if i'd not been there at bedtime. it sounds like she'll be fine without you, although that's not nice to hear lol!!

3 days is a long time for you though, poor you!!

Fleago

Hi Jay Jay,

My parents live a good distance away, so didn't get to see my daughter as much as they would have liked when she was a tot, so they used to take her to stay with them for a few days from about the age your baby is to make up for not seeing her on a regular basis. She used to love these trips and they adored having her all to themselves, even though I worried about how they would cope. The thing I found helped was to remember that my Mum and Dad had managed to cope with me when I was a baby, so doing the same for their grandaughter should be a breeze :rotfl:

Try not to worry as I'm sure your little one will be fine and her grandparents will so appreciate the opportunity to have her all to themselves

Fleago

Jay-Jay_4

Thank you both

Jellyhead, you learn from your first don't you? I was a martyr with my first, wouldn't let anyone do anything for her, it had to be ME! I was at her beck and call and she wouldn't settle without me. I'm much more relaxed with this one.....still going to miss the little minx though.

Fleago, thanks, I'm sure I'm worrying over nothing. The thing is that it's my OHs parents who are looking after her and I don't really know them 'that' well as they live a couple of hours away. I do trust them and they're really lovely people, I'm just worried that my daughter won't feel ummm......secure with them.

I suppose we all feel that nobody's as good as 'Mum'. I wouldn't even feel comfortable for her Dad to look after her for 3 nights without me :rolleyes:. I just have this niggle telling me that she'll miss me and be upset.

I'll be busy when I'm away so won't have much time to worry about her, also I won't have any access to a phone for much of the time (Saturday am till Sunday pm).

bethscott1970

Don't forget Jay Jay that time goes a lot quicker when you are that young, she won't be able to count the days for example. Phoning her might not be the best idea as if she hears your voice that might be unsettling for her (by all mean ring grandparents to reassure yourself). The sad truth is that children cope a lot better than we give them credit for and as long as their routines are basically the same they don't panic the way older people would. The only thing to remember is to try to relax (she might pick up the fact you're worried when you leave but she'll settle quicky) and enjoy your break, she'll be fine and as soon as you pick her up she'll have pretty much forgotten you had ever been away

Jay-Jay_4

Thank you Beth,

You're right, time does fly for children doesn't it?

When the time comes for me to leave her I'll be all positive and smiley and excited for her rather than sobbing as I leave, it's just for the next 4 weeks that I'll be in turmoil :rolleyes:


I really do appreciate all your comments, I feel much more positive after reading your advice. I'm not normally a soppy person, I'm usually quite practical but this is a new one for me.

jellyhead

mine's 8 but i still worry about him, lol! a couple of times recently i've stayed overnight in hospital and have worried about him and really missed him only to find that he's perfectly happy with hubby and hasn't missed me at all i asked if me missed me and he said no, he likes being taken to school by dad because dad wears a suit so he looks 'posh' ! spud even packs me a cuddly toy for hospital because he thinks i'm a soppy old mare who will be sad and lonely on my own lol! it's good to know that despite my mollycoddling him as a baby he's okay without me now

i think i'd be more worried about my in-laws than i would with my own parents, silly isn't it, but they live an hour away and we don't see them every day. i've never left spud with them although he'd be fine, and judging by the way MIL dotes on him it would be the same as when we go away and leave the bunnies in the care of relatives - i write more than a page on their routine etc. because i don't want them to be sad, i overcompensate by saying they can have a treat every day, then they love their carer more than us and they sulk when we come back