What is the best way to deal with my own funeral if no-one else will?

mum_of_joey

Hallo. I am new on here and have quite a sad question to ask, which is worrying me.

I am 67 and live on my own. My brother and I 'fell out' after our mother's death 6 years ago (suffice to say that he never helped my mother out, even though he is rich, and she was stuffing the holes in her window panes with newspaper to keep the cold out). I don't think that he would agree to pay for my funeral if I died, and, as he is 5 years older than me, he may go first and there is no way his wife would help (though as I have health problems, I may go first). I have a son, but there has never been a particularly close relationship between us, and I feel that I don't want to impose this onto him, in any case..

My brother and I shared the estate on my mother's death, which I lived on for several years before having to go back onto benefits. My brother said that he 'didn't need it', and would probably give it to his son.

I am in a Debt Management Programme with StepChange (an 'unofficial' one - ie not an IVA or Bankruptcy) as I have a huge amount of debts - and this is likely to last for the rest of my life at the present rate of paying.

I have investigated Funeral Plans but cannot afford anything like the monthly payments. Even a 'direct cremation' costs more per month than I could possibly afford. I have investigated donating my body to medical research to save on funeral costs, but there is no guarantee that I will be accepted because of my health problems and they may have to revert to me having to have a normal funeral if that happens, which would mean costs for my two remaining family members.

I have very few friends, and they are not close, and feel that very few people would come to my funeral in any case. I have no 'loved ones' - ie man friend or anything. My family members would not be able to claim any sort of grant as both my brother and my son have too much money and would be expected to pay for my funeral. I feel as though I would be considered a nuisance for putting them in this position. As I said, a very sad situation.

Can anyone advise as to what would be my best course of action, please? As my brother had half of my mother's estate (£85,000), can he be made to pay for my funeral?

Mojisola

mum_of_joey wrote: »

Can anyone advise as to what would be my best course of action, please? As my brother had half of my mother's estate (£85,000), can he be made to pay for my funeral?

No-one else can be made to pay for your funeral.

If a person dies in a hospital and doesn't leave enough money to pay for a funeral, the NHS will arrange and pay for it.

If a person dies somewhere other than a hospital, the local authority will sort it out and pay for it.

It will be a simple but dignified funeral.

Don't worry about it.

Added: any money (or goods that can be sold) that you do leave will be collected by whichever agency arranges the funeral to help pay for it.

mum_of_joey

Thank you for your message. I didn't realise that it would be paid for somehow and that I wouldn't just be left out in a bin bag!

I have a very old car which isn't worth much, so I guess they might take that to help pay for the funeral, but it's only worth about £500. Otherwise, I am gradually selling stuff in the house in order for me to feed my cats properly, so there might not be much left by the time anything happens to me!

Money_maker

Why do you still have debts if you received 85k under 6 years ago?

mum_of_joey

I may have got £85,000 but I had £25,000 worth of debts, which I paid off in full. I had been on a VERY low salary and had to rely on credit cards. This left me with £60,000. I made a bad investment on a caravan, hoping that this would bring in a steady income, which it didn't and after 2 years the owner of the caravan site made me take it off the site as he had 'plans' for new caravans to go on there - even though when I bought it, the Manager (who had been sacked since I bought it) had told me that I could have it there for as long as I wanted. I had no proof of that and the Manager had gone to Australia. I had to sell the caravan for £500 as I couldn't afford the rent for another site and it's not much good without a site.

So that left me with under £50,000. I bought my present car (now worth £500 but cost £5,000) and spent £2,000 on gravelling my front garden so I could park on it, as it was a mud pile, and the landlord didn't want to do it. So when you work out what is left, that is just over £40,000 left. That is £10,000 per year for 4 years. My rent cost £4,800 per year. Not a lot left after that!