A spot of mother in law trouble

Thriftylady

I posted on here a few weeks ago about my MIL and the fact that she undermines me a bit when it comes to dealing with my two month old baby.

I got loads of helpful answers and I have to say, things have improved.

However......

One of the things I mentioned previously was that I use washable nappies. MIL has taken to buying disposables. When she gives them to me they end up in a cupboard, but when she has baby at her house she refuses to use my washables (even though I always send all the supplies) and puts her in disposables instead. Now, to take this from just being mildly irritating to really doing my head in, my baby seems to be allergic or something, and when a disposable is put on her she gets nappy rash.

In a strange way, this suits me as although I obviously don't want my baby to be uncomfortable, it does give me better ammunition for insisting that she does what I ask. She seems to think that I am using washables because I can't afford disposables, which is not the case at all.

So basically my MIL seems to have been taken in by the evil disposables and their advertising, you know where they used to say that disposables prevented nappy rash, and now she doesn't believe me that in our case its actually them that is causing it. She thinks that its my nappies that aren't good enough for her dear grandchild.......

So what now? I can't ban granny from seeing the light of her life all because of us disagreeing about nappies ! Why is life never simple ??!!

Alleycat

Only thing I can think of would be to actually show your MIL the effects of wearing disposables after a day with her. If she doesn't believe you that they are causing nappy rash, seeing the evidence may help? Also, could you print off some info regarding the use of reusables and the effects of disposables? The Nappy Lady or Womens Environmental Network should have something useful.

Thriftylady

I think what makes is most difficult is the fact that she really thinks she is doing me a favour. If she was just a nasty old witch I could deal with her so much more easily !!

joannasmum

I had this as well. The nappy rash is a reaction because your LO is not used to the chemicals in the nappies and would proberbly suside when your LO's body got used to them.I told MIL that my DD was allergic to diposables (not really a lie) and that my GP had told me I must not put her in them she didnt dare argue with the medical profession.

HTH

Hunnymonster

Say the Health Visitor told you to stop using dispos if they're causing nappy rash. Worked for us for something else about DS (now 4) but he's got me demented so I can't remember what it was that we wanted to stop the DGs (doting grandparents - all four of them) doing

kathyd_2

MIL probably used terry nappies with her babies and knows how much work is involved with the washing and therefore, thinks disposables are a wonderful invention. If your little one breaks out with nappy rash when she uses them I would do as joannasmum suggested and tell her you have taken her to the doctor and that once the urine comes into contact with something in the nappy it results in the rash. Failing that I'm afraid you will just have to bite your tongue. Baby won't be in nappies for ever. Not easy.

inkie

Would go with the medical advice theory offered above, but also get the conversation around to something like - 'disposables being more trouble then they are worth if they are giving (baby's name) nappy rash - good job i'm sticking with the terries, afterall, they were good enough for (your hubbies name)

Nicki

I don't agree that baby will necessarily get used to the rash. My DD developed a really nasty rash when we switched brands from Pampers to Huggies, but we didn't immediately make the connection as to the reason. She only wears nappies at night, and the rash got steadily worse and worse over a period of several weeks until one night we put her nappy on and her bottom immediately went bright red and puffy like a baboon's and we suddenly twigged. We think she was allergic to the bleach which they use in this brand of nappy. Allergies are just as likely to get worse as they are to get better, and even if they did eventually improve its not really worth putting the child through a long period of discomfort just for this. I would print out some info about allergies - the scarier the better - and show it to MIL along with a statement that HV or GP said DD was allergic and shock her into supporting you on this