partner ill...need leave from work ?

stuckinmyflat

dark lady : i now really feel sorry for those who are in this situation permanently. its really a disgrace, and im glad this is only a short term issue. im in total agreement about parents getting time off for their children.

dark_lady

Thankyou its lovely to get such supportive comments

stuckinmyflat

i cant leave him in the hospital , there simply isnt enough beds..they are already threatening to turf him out in the evening after the surgery. i cant afford to pay for a carer. As for getting someone else, i am trying to arrange this but is proving difficult as friends and family have lives and jobs too (most of whom work for the NHS, so also work irregular hours).

i made my employer aware that i was going to need this leave a few months ago (told them a rough idea of the dates), however my partner didnt actually get his surgery date till last week (fri) and i told them that day.

stuckinmyflat

ive just read back thro this thread, and what ive come to realise is..... ive known about this for to long for me to be eligible for any leave, but not long enough to give my employer a reasonable amount of time to give me leave ?????? :eek:

Emmzi

so, if they turf him out, and you are *unavailable to help*, what is the discharge and support plan?

Do they think he can cope? if so, how? with what gadgets and devices?

If no one turns up to take him home, and he can't walk out of the ambulance, and your house is not suitable for someone on crutches or wheelchairs, what exactly is going to happen? If he needs full time caare, as you are implying, then he will just have to stay put if no carer is available! If it is really that serious you need to grow a hard neck.

On a practical level, what does he actually need? Something to urinate into and a small pile of sandwiches to tide him over until you get back? more? what are your specific concerns, and can they be addressed by ensuring he has suppplies, and a mobile phone in his pocket?

single people have operations every day. how do they cope? what guidance have the hospital offered about after care? If you were prepared to take unpaid leave could you employ someone to come in for an hour part way through your shft to make sure everything is ok with the money you will be earning instead?

I know I sound harsh but you cannot force your employer to give you leave. There is simply no right to it. Therefore practical alternatives are required - there must be some!

Emmzi

PS a good friend had a foot op recently. she was ok at home with crutches, a kettle by the sofa, and a packet of biscuits, while hubby was at work. It took a bit of planning to get her up and srted in the morning before he left, but I think it is possible.

stuckinmyflat

my oh had this same surgery on the other foot in march, i was called at 11am the next day whilst i was at work( was lucky enough to get day shifts for the swine flu response centre), after being told he was not going to be discharged until that evening, i explained i was not able to come get him until the evening. i was promptly told that they needed the bed and he was being dressed and sat in the waiting room to be collected. he sat there for 3hrs (because thats how long it took me to argue my way into leaving work to get him) as for ambulance transport well there was none and the hospital is 30 miles from where we live.

after getting him home (and having to drag him up 2 flights of stairs) he was in extreme pain, he was taking morphine. he was so wired i had to control his meds..........etc there was no way he would have coped himself. i had to call an OOH gp out 3 times in the first 48hrs

clearly you havent had the experience of greater glasgow and clyde health board. they do not provide help.

and on a side note i highly doubt ur friends foot op was as extensive as my OH, unfortunately he is having all of his toes broken and reset with pins, his arch dropped, his heel and ankle broken in a few different areas , and all the tendons in his toes and back of his legs tightened ( he has CMT)

dark_lady

Our caring sharing NHS. NOT

Emmzi

not that serious, no

I do have direct experience of Glasgow NHS tho, from when I lived there. They *will* provide appropriate care but you have to be a stroppy mare to get it. Before he goes in you need to be asking about the discharge plan, and insititing on support, and getting it all in writing.

Emmzi

..last post - the guidelines for discharge are hee (needs powerpoint to view) - I would suggest you need 2 man ambulance team to take home and a district nurse to visit..

http://www.nhsggc.org.uk/content/default.asp?cx=007598360610212091837%3Ai56c3sowvje&page=s1380&cof=FORID%3A11&ie=UTF-8&q=discharge&sa=Search&siteurl=www.nhsggc.org.uk%2Fcontent%2Fdefault.asp%3Fpage%3Ds761#1123