Kids and money - how do we train them so they don't repeat our mistakes?

elona

Sounds like your mum is really supportive!!!!;)
That is just what you need! I think that retorting spending money you do not have is not a good example for them!

Nix143

bargainbetty wrote:

I hope he picks up your DFW habits in time to stay just DF!
x

I hope I can develop those habits so that they're there for him to pick up!

Gemmzie

At 12, I'd start with pocket money per month. Giving them weekly money makes it too easy, if it is monthly then they have longer to wait if it all gets spent too quickly.

When I was about thirteen, my mum gave me control of my CB (but this depends on your circumstances). I was told I had to buy school uniform and necessary clothing first and could spend the rest on clothes of my choice. When I was 16, she started transfering into my bank account so I had 100% control. Taught me alot about getting what you need before what you want

Dr.Shoe_2

Our daughter has turned out to be quite good with her own money but a bit more cavalier with other peoples- especially mine! LOL

I think that she's always seen us going without things because of debts and doesn't want it to happen to her.

pounds_and_pensive

Somewhere downstairs I've got copies of my SOA from when things were at their very bleakest, and am thinking of giving one of them, together with a brief outline of how it came to be and what it took to get out of it, to each of my kids when they leave home. I've told my mum that if I pop my clogs in the meantime, they'll be getting them in my will

It's definitely something I worry about, but I know from my own experience of kids (I used to be one ) that parents lying awake at nights teaches nothing - sadly, it's making your own mistakes that you really learn from.

However, more and more people are wising up now to what's really behind the 'Buy now, pay later' (and pay BIG-TIME) messages that leap out from every advert. I think of the growing band of savvy consumers as similar to the green movement when it first started getting into its stride, and since many young people today are more environmentally aware than people were a generation ago, there's at least a small chance that our kids will grow up into a society that's not making the same financial mistakes anymore, and looks with disgust at anything that tries to tempt them to.

Apart from leading by (usually!) dazzling example, I think the best thing we can do to promote a healthy financial outlook for the next generation is to spread the MSE Word wherever we go

chevalier

My mum gave me my child benefit,plus my dinner money.Out of this I had to buy everything except uniform.This was at 12.I think it did teach me the value of cash,but I didgo offthe rails when I was allowed a credit card......

shayshay

I have three kids 4,2 and nearly one. When they are old enough I dont intend to give them pocket money, more a case of earn it. They enjoy going to car boots which gets them some fresh air and they learn about bargains.

Other tips which mya be a bit late for teenagers is to save the coins where possible and let the children count them and bag them up and then go into their own bank and deposit the money, this way they hopefully get into the habit of saving and as they get older will do so with their wage as it rises.

Other than that just be honest with them, when they are teenagers they will realise a bit more about money. Getting a Saturday job and earning extra money will give them independence. You could do all of the above and the worst could happen and if so you can help to provide advice on how to get out of it, after all they will make their own mistakes and doing so will help shape them.

dlb

All my 4 kids know the mess me and my husband are in, we talk about it openly with them, and they are very interested in what a credit card is why do you have to pay it back ect
And i think it is good not to hide anything from them, since i have found this site my eldest who is 10 has been so supportive, his latest comment today when i pulled up at shop was..
`What are you going to shop for?`
`Some bread`
`make some in the bread maker,you said it saves money`
I got back in the car and went home and did just that.
Just shows you if my kids are 3,8,9+10 and understand a little after so few weeks of them hearing me go on about tips on this site, things can only get better as they help me find money saving tips on here.

cathybird

my parents were very careful with money and I went completely the opposite way too. My dad was always asking me "was I saving money" and I never took one iota of notice ... then again I know how to turn around and economise now, partly because I'm used to the idea because it's what I grew up with. so you do learn by example I think.... eventually....

Scully's_Girl

It is really amazing how two people who grow up in exactly the same household can be so different. My parents had little when we were growing up and as a result I never really had the latest anything. My sister is four years older than me and has always been poor. She seems to be forever trapped in a cycle of poverty. She did drop out of college after her second year and moved to a place that has pretty meagre employment oppurtunities, then had a baby at 21.
I think I learned the most from watching her. I went to college, got a job right out of it and am still with that company today. I budget for everything, save everywhere, and happily married a likeminded man, so we are doing ok. I see how my neice looks at money and it scares me to bits. That is why I jumped on this board, because I want to have children one day and desperately don't want them to lack a proper respect for money and how it works. I sat with my neice one day and tried explaining that we paid off our mortgage before I was 30 and what a big step that is. To a 12 year old, 30 is a million miles away and she just cant relate to that. I think what Ill personally do is not give in to my childrens demands, and if they kick up a fuss, remove them from the premises. Stick with me a couple of years though cuz we're not expecting yet.