18 yr old Suspended

Molly41

I thought i would start a new thread. Whilst there are similarlities to another thread I think there are different issues and I would like advice.

I have an 18 year old son. he has JUST been diagnosed with ADHD after years of difficulties. To give him credit he completed his A levels and has held down a part-time job for year plus. i have to support him a lot with organisation etc. hestill lives at home and has continued to study at college of FE.

He made a genuine mistake at work and was suspensed for it He went in for a meeting and explained he had a lapse in concentration and explained that he just been diagnosed with ADHD. He wasnt making excuses he admitted he made a mistake. He still suspended but now they want to send him to Occupational Health. What does this mean and how should we handle it? Shouls i go with him or should he go by himself - I take on bord comments made on another thread about "mollycoddling" Do you think they going to sack him? We all finding it very stressful.
Thanks
Molly

Oldernotwiser

I would take it as a positive sign that they're sending him to OH rather than just sacking him. I don't think that there's anything wrong with your taking him to this as long as you don't actually go into the appointment with him.

foxy-roxy

Yes i agree with oldernotwiser, we had a colleague go to OH and we knew then he wasn't going to get sacked as why would they waste there time with it if they were?

hothothot_3

Molly41 wrote: »

and has held down a part-time job for year plus.

which means he has more protection legally against being sacked. As he has informed them of the disability they have to see if they can make 'reasonable' adjustments to accomodate the disability, which is very likely the reason for the OH being involved.

Only you know your son best so forget about what other people think, everyone has different needs and of course it would be better if he was able to deal with the situation himself, but if it is going to be a downright agony and terror then id say you should go with him.

I would be wary that the OH appointment is the start of a 'back covering' exercise, basically making sure that if they do want to sack him that they wont fall foul of the disability discrimination laws.

Molly41

I would be wary that the OH appointment is the start of a 'back covering' exercise, basically making sure that if they do want to sack him that they wont fall foul of the disability discrimination laws.[/QUOTE]

Thanks for response. Thats what Im worried about. They are a reputable company. I have talked to DS dad who feels one of us should go with him. Probably he will go as he a manager himself.

Anyway we shall see.

Oldernotwiser

hothothot wrote: »

which means he has more protection legally against being sacked. As he has informed them of the disability they have to see if they can make 'reasonable' adjustments to accomodate the disability, which is very likely the reason for the OH being involved.

Only you know your son best so forget about what other people think, everyone has different needs and of course it would be better if he was able to deal with the situation himself, but if it is going to be a downright agony and terror then id say you should go with him.

I would be wary that the OH appointment is the start of a 'back covering' exercise, basically making sure that if they do want to sack him that they wont fall foul of the disability discrimination laws.

I think that if you go looking for trouble, as you continually seem to do, you're likely to find it.

Molly41

Thanks Oldernot wiser. That's a very good point. I will be positive and encourage him to be the same.

MrsTinks

He's 18 - go with him by all means but do not whatever you do go in with him!
ADHD doesn't mean he's slow or not mentally developed like his peers - he's as bright as anyone and having his mum with him is not going to look good OR do his confidence any good. Give him advice, tell him to tell the truth and call you when he's finished at OH.
OH does not mean a back covering exercise - OH are usually a 3rd party (often BUPA) who's doctors will have no personal connection to your son, his workplace or anyone there. His manager will have explained the job he does to OH, maybe the reason they have referred him and what points concern them so that they can discuss them with your son and suggest solutions to his employer.
Your son will then have to explain the situation to the OH doctor, discuss with them if he thinks he's able to continue in the current job safely, if any changes would help him do so and so on. The OH doctor won't be biased either way and are an unbiased party.

Let him be the adult he is and he'll do fine.

Oldernotwiser

Molly41 wrote: »

Thanks Oldernot wiser. That's a very good point. I will be positive and encourage him to be the same.

If your son works for a reputable company, as you say, then they seem to be dealing with the issue in a sensible and responsible manner.

Go with him and support him up - to the door if necessary -but please don't actually go into the room with him.

hothothot_3

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

If he's only just been diagnosed I doubt that he's claiming any disability benefits (or be eligible for any) and won't be covered by the DDA.

I think that if you go looking for trouble, as you continually seem to do, you're likely to find it.

Rather be forewarned to the possibility then be surprised later.

If he has a perceived disability they still have to try and make adjustments under the DDA.

I know people who have disabilities and not claimed any benefits.

Molly41

Thankyou for all your replies. My son is very bright and tries very hard and has done very well despite his ADHD. I will obviously support him and ask him what he wants.