Graduate Job Offer Dilemma

khublaikhan

Embarrassed really but first some background:

I have a wife and Kids and decided to go to Uni in 2004 to change my career - being over forty I took a huge risk but everything seemed OK as I did exceptionally well at Uni. However, I have been in the doldrums working part-time for over a year (graduated June 2008) and have been firing off my CV's all over the place, with no success - eventually regretting my career change.

A few weeks ago I get an interview offer from a well respected organisation based in London (I am from Yorkshire) and think what have I to lose? To my utter surprise and amazement I get a job offer and in my elation I accept. The job itself has excellent prospects, is high profile and I can consider myself lucky to even get the interview let alone anything else.

Then it dawns upon me that I have wife and kids and a move to London is a huge upheavel for them as well as myself, I also do not really wish for my kids to grow up there and am definately not looking forward to the endless hours commuting to and from work.

I have four weeks before I start the new job but am really dreading it - my Misses would kill me if she found out what I was writing here!

Any saintly advice gratefully appreciated

Thanks in advance

456789

I would say you have to go for it

After a few years once the recession lessens and you have experience in a london organisation it should be easier for you to get a job back in yorkshire if you wanted

the family situation is a bit more complex though - do you think you could afford/cope to live in london on your own for a year or two? then they won't have to move but you would be away from each other

PlutoinCapricorn

A former colleague was in a similar position: he used to live in a rented room in London during the week and go home to his family at weekends. If what I have been reading is true, the cost of renting in London is dropping as rooms stand empty. Some people are taking in a lodger, just to help ends meet. The new job sounds really good: would buying a flat in London be a possibility?

And don't forget the £19 and £9 Travelodge sale rooms: provided that you book well in advance, you can book family rooms in some of the best locations in London. National Express coach tickets between London and many large towns e.g. Leeds and York can be bought for £1, there are good train bargains too.

The practicalities are one thing, the family separation side is another matter. There is a price for everything, it sounds like too good an opportunity to miss.

PlutoinCapricorn

Was anything said about this at the interview? If they are a reputable company, then their HR department might be able to help, assuming that you decide to live apart from your family. Does the work lend itself to working from home? May people have long journeys, so they arrange to work one or two days each week from home.

This job makes all that work and the career change worthwhile, it would be a pity to let it go. Have you got any relatives in London?

kazwookie

How does your wife feel about all this have to talked to her, she might have worries about it all as well but not voiced her opinion because you are so happy.

Horace

I think that you should take the job - your family could possibly move closer to London but not to London itself, for instance Birmingham (it has some pleasant parts) which is is an easy commute or you stay in London during the week and go home at weekends which is what a lot of people do.

If this is your dream job then you need to go for it otherwise you will regret it and will live a life of what ifs and life is too short for that. Sometimes you need to take risks in life and this is one of those times.

Good luck with the new job.

pinkshoes

You're from Yorkshire, so it's a direct 2h20 minute train journey.

You could leave at 5.30am from Leeds on a Monday morning (arrive 8am Kings X), stay in a pre booked cheap travellodge room all week, then travel back on Friday after work. Booked in advance, the train fair is only about £80 return.

Yes, it would be tiring at first, but you could look to moving your family NEAR London (many nice towns and cities within 1 hour commute...)

DKLS

Depending where you are in Yorkshire, you can commute to London daily, I go around 2-3 times a week from Wakefield.
Its a long day starting at 7am and getting home at 7pm but doable in the short term.

Also dont think of London as one big nasty place, think of it more like 100 small towns that vary enormously.

khublaikhan

OK - other than telling my wife to go back to the kitchen - some excellent advice and food for thought. I have discussed the matter with her and there was a tidbit of info I forgot to mention (my excuse is that I wrote the thread at 3AM last night!) - she is heavily pregnant and is having a difficult time of it. We have agreed that she will stay put in sunny yorkshire where the extended family can help with the newborn. So at this moment it looks like I am going to pursue the job offer.

I have been offered accomodation (1 bed flat - Slough) at the cost of paying the mortgage (Approx £600 pm) which is 25 miles from work but I am intrigued by the option of TavelLodge Sale rooms. I have been on their site and was only able to find info on TavelLodge Saver rooms - @ £19 pm. Am I on the right track here - I want accomodation as cheap as possible as it looks like I will be paying for two households (my own and the wifes).

Once again thanks for the advice.

Pee

I think I'd be looking at being a weekday lodger. I don't know what that would cost but would have thought £100 - £150 might get you something perfectly central. You could then do the train to York on a Monday morning and a Friday evening. It might be possible to do overtime in the week to leave earlier, worth looking into once you have started the job. And then you can catch up with your sleep in the week ready for the night duty at the weekends!!

I think you will be hard pressed to find cheap travelodge rooms on that sort of longterm basis...

PlutoinCapricorn

This job may justify all the effort made getting your qualifications. Taking it does seem like a good idea, but the family problems make things very difficult.

If there is an extended family back home, it is best that they all stay put.

I mentioned Travelodge £9 rooms in connection with family visits to London, not as a possible place for you to stay! The £9 and the £19 rooms often come up in special seasonal sales just for one or two consecutive nights. If you look at the prices for a particular week, you may see one night at £19, one at £29 and the rest for much more.

If you live close to the station each end, daily commuting is possible in theory, but many people who do that sooner or later find that they just can't take it. A rented room rather than a flat would work out cheaper. There are many tips on here especially Old Style Money Saver about how to live and eat well and cheaply.