I had no idea...

niksyg

Hello,

I guess this is a kind of encouragement thread, and I hope this is the right place for it.
Basically I was chatting to my Mum the other day and we started talking about her bankruptcy, and it really hit home just how demeaning it was for her, and anyone else, to go through.
After my dad died my mum had to run their company on her own and really really struggled to try and keep our lifestyles as they were, anyway, cut a long story short and she ended up having to declare herself as bankrupt, but because I was young then I had no idea how bad it was for her.

She has since told me that everything she had was taken, all credit stopped, her life policy which she had taken out to make sure I had some inheritence was stopped, her car was taken, she had nothing, and the thing that hit me was the fact that the court made her pay for the privalege of it all!! £400! Where the hell was she meant to get that from?! Luckily a kind friend helped but that's not the point, what if there hadn't been anyone?! She said that the worst of it was that the official receiver's offices were the smartest ever and everything they had was personalised to the company...like 'complimentary' mints and chocs. Hmmm...wonder where the money for that came from??? I couldn't believe it!

Anyway, I guess that what I am trying to get across is that it must be awful for anyone to have to go through that but it is now 8 years on and she has her life back, has money to spend on holidays (off to Greece in 2 weeks lucky thing!) So...it will get better and I wish anyone who is in the same boat at the moment all the best wishes in the world and although that doesn't ease the stress of it all...at least I can tell you things will improve!

Good luck to you and try and stay positive about the future...

sniggings

thats funny what you say about the mints etc I work near an insolvency office and the cars in their drive are unbelievable,theres even an aston martin!

about feeling ashamed etc after going BR,I agree that some will find the process very hard and when it also involves a businness that would add to the stress and I also think that in the last few years BR is not viewed as bad as it once was but I would say many more people feel a greater sense of relief than ashamed,what I'm trying to say is don't feel too bad for your mum as I'm sure she was glad of BR at the time and like you said it has given her a new start,so was glad she did it.

IcelandicMaiden

Thank you so much for your positive and encouraging words, there are so many of us in your mums shoes right now, that it is wonderful that she managed to turn her life around and things are so positive for her now.

It must have been hard for your mother then, I doubt there was the forums, and help that there is around today. I suspect she faced much more stigma than she would have if she had to go Bankrupt today.

Well done to your mother it cannot have been easy. I take inspiration and hope from your comments.

Many Thanks.

slowandsteady_2

Thankyou for your words, i was discharged since March but despite having no choice about BR, and despite having a good job, i couldnt even get a bank account untill this April, so humiliating having bank staff look at you in 'that' way, thankfully Nationwide gave me a basic account so im just starting to get back on top of things after having my salary paid into my sisters account for months.

It is not a 'choice' made easily or without serious thought, nobody would happily put themselves through this unneccessarily.

Thankyou again

maxmycardagain

sniggings wrote: »

thats funny what you say about the mints etc I work near an insolvency office and the cars in their drive are unbelievable,theres even an aston martin!

have you seen an IPs scale of charges?

£700/hr for the top man, £250/hr for an office junior, £24 per A4 photocopy....

chuckys_nanny

niksyg Im am so glad your Mum is doing so well, good luck to her.