Are you a happy or sad person?

gabyjane

In general life i mean how are you in terms of your outlook? I will just add i am not long 30 so not old... (no comments there freakyogre!)

I am coming to the conclusion that i am miserable most of the time! not in a depressed way just fed up with things and i seem to moan more than enjoy things if that makes sense!

My job...I get up in the mornings and go to work early (5.30-8am) things are not great at work and i could afford to leave but there seems to always be something stopping me..i swore when we bought this house i would as we needed it for the mortgage (we didnt as it turns out but still) but then as dh had proposed i kept working there as we were saving for that and it really did help..so we got married and talked about me leaving..then we decided to get all new stuff for the house etc, we moved and got a new car, new sofa etc and have paid most off apart from the car so actually don't need it BUT i feel like it is my security in a way as i am self employed. It is such few hours for the money but would chnage things slightly if i left (in that i wouldn't be as tired!) pros and cons dont work as we have tried and they equal!

I work as a childminder and love my job! BUT my friend who i worked with 5 days per week and spent all my time with has had to give up due to loss of work..she has another job now and isn't happy but no kids means she hasn't much choice! this is where i appreciate my other job for back up 'incase'! I am quiet and don't mix well unless i am with someone i know, all my friends work days and i see no one..i tick along and am buisy with the kids but just wish she would get a call and come back to spending her days with me as i miss the company!

Dd is 10 she is hard work at the mo, the teenage years come early! everything is a battle which seeing as she has been an angel child from birth is very hard for me to deal with..i have the ignoring in the mornings which isn't a great start to the day! we have attitude and general arkward behaviour..

Our rabbits we have issues with, may seem like a daft thing to get fed up with but i am on the verge of rehoming them as we have constant battles with them, argue with dd and hubby and at the mo they are far from a joy that they have been for the last few months..feeling bad about them too as love them to bits but we are all frought over them...

Family..my brother is hard work..as always! has no idea what stress he causes and my sister has posted about him too and not sure what to do..i worry for him too..my dad i get upset about a lot and more so lately as my sister has been off work and seen him more so i have thought more about why he dislikes me so much..

Dd's dad is back soon from prison and this is niggling at me, he has not seen dd for 10 years so have no worry that he will turn up but still feel uneasy he wil be around soon.

Daily things like driving, i am sure i come across as 60 at times (no offence!) but get so tired of the idiot drivers on the rds..i go out a lot with the kids during the day and school runs etc mean i am usually out and about so notice it more..dd's school is ina village so very chatic all the time and seems to be awful down there the last few weeks..it really gets me down first thing and makes me not want to drive some days!! talking to some mums at school i am not alone but still!

The housework..i am quite anal and like everything away (apart from when the kids ar here when it looks like a bomb has gone off!) dh has to be told to do veryhting which is draining to say the least and monitored lol so we have had a few ructions over that.

BUT basically when someone asks how i am i say' oh well x this x that and it's always depressing..always something negative and i really try to be happy but it's just me! I have lots to be happy about..a lovely dd (most of the time) a lovely husband (most of the time!), a lovely house, a lovely car and a good income but can't see past these sometimes..what do i need to snap out of it!! (nice replies please!)

carlamagee

i dont think i have any answers for ya. when i feel like that, i try to like on the other scale of the spectrum = eg. your have a good job; some people are being laid off.
your dd is well; some parents have very porrly children
housework - does everything have to be put away all the time? its not gonna hurt you to leave one or two things until the next day, or to stop and chill out and havea cuppa tea/coffee and do it an hour or so later?
driving = there is ALWAYS idiots on the roads - no matter where you live, just one of those things!
what about going to talk to your docor? you may not be clincally depressed to get anti-depressants, but you could recieve soomething else from them?
or what about taking up a hobby that would get u away from the normal day life activities that your finding it ackward/annoying to deal with!??
just some ideas?! hope they help!!

Older_but_not_wiser_2

Gabyjane, there are times in our lives when we all sink into a wee bit of a downer, but as Carla has said, look at the positives in your life.

Everything else is just inconsequential - the bad drivers, well they'll get their comuppance eventually. The rabbits, you can always make a nice stew out of. Brothers/family, you can choose your friends, but not your family so just try to see the good in them or give them good advice, hopefully they'll pay attenton and take that advice.
As for the housework, one or two days a week, just let it slide. We have a 3 & 4 year old and it's just not possible to keep the house totally pristene 24/7, so take a leaf out of our book and just chill out about the mess (it reminds me of my student days sometimes).

And remember, the glass is always half full. (usually very full of wine in our house )

RedBern

do you do anything for yourself? Why not have some 'me' time - go and .. I don't know.. join a salsa class, go swimming, to the gym... do something to find 'you' again. Look around, there's a lot that's good - change the things you can change, and if you can't change something, change your attitude.

**skinnyminny**

I am just like you, i have a lot to be thankful for, yet seem to get caught up with the negative stuff and feel like i am always miserable.
My mum tells me to enjoy the simple things in life,like a cup of tea in peace when the kiddies are napping in the day, but that is easy for her to say when she can have 10 cuppas a day in peace while mine always goes cold by the time i have done the dishes,washing,cleaning,sorted meals out etc!
I agree that finding time for yourself is the key,since i have started going for a stroll alone when my oh gets in or jumping in the bath the second he gets through the door,that is when i start to count my blessings.
I think that life sometimes gets repetitive and therefore so do our feelings.
You are certainly not alone in how you feel as i am the same:D

nzmegs

I have to say that although i do moan I can generally always see a brighter side. I always see the best in people and sometimes am terribly let down, but I a;ways bounce back.

We had some family frineds once whoose lives were always in chaos. From getting ill constantly, to money worries, to family dramas. Seeing them was a drain in the end. we came to the conclusion that the general negativity in their attitudes brought on all the other stuff - particlularly the ill health.

My husband and I have pretty serious debt, couldn't buy groceries last week because we were at the end of our overdraft, husband is working 6 or 7 days a week to make more money, I work part time plus am self employed - but for whatever reason we always have a laugh and enjoy our life. Yes it is stressful, but we know that these times won't last forever and we just make the most of it.

I don't believe in doing things like taking walks to imporve your mood. it has to come from within. Somewhere deep inside of you is a negativity swtich and you need to turn it off. The same things will keep on happening but you will hopefully deal with it better.