Please help, about to become a single mum with little finances!

jlb1910

I will try and keep this brief but after 3 yrs of trying to get my husband off canabis I have today found out he is still taking it. lots of horrible things has happend to me over past 2yrs and now I have to make the decision to leave him.

Problems being we jointly own our house which is in negative equitity because of a rather large first plus fixed loan on it. I financially cannot afford to pay the mortgage/bills on my own as I work at a school 4 days a week which only brings home £500 month, I also get working tax credits as my husband and are I living seperatly (have been for past few months) so get £700 and family allowance of £170. My mortgage is £700, fixed loan is £600 plus all normal bills ontop of that. For last few months hubbie was still paying so we could stay in house. He has now lost his main employed job so as from next month he wont be paying me anything. I presume I will lose house as I cant see that there is any benefit that will help me. But what happens next as apparantly the waiting list for a council house in our little town is a mile long. Can I go into private rented accomodation and will I get help towards rent.

Who or where do I go to get the best advise as to what to do next. This is completely devastating for me as I have 3 beautiful kids aged 7, 4 and 2 and dont know how I am going to cope for them, I feel such a failure! Everything I have worked so hard to build up has been completely snatched away by my selfish husband who cares about nother but his next cannabis fix!

Because I work 20hrs a week I cant get any income support (even though I only earn £7k a year) should I give up my job or ask to reduce hours?

Please if anyone has been through a similar situation any advise would be appreciated I feel like I am at my wits end.

alwaysonthego_2

Hi, if you are having problems with paying your mortgage you need to see the CAB asap because they are severe consequences to having your house repossessed and you could be left with alot of debt. You will not qualify for LHA if you have an house to live in presently, but you could enquire at your council to be listed as being homeless once your are repossessed and they would have to rehome you. This could mean in a hostel or B&B. Shelter could give you further info on this, aswell as the CAB.

You could claim WTC, CTC, CB and CTB.

SuziQ

Not the same desperate situation as you at all,but I became a single mum of 3 almost a year ago,and yes it is daunting-but you have already proved yourself to be strong and you will cope. You are not the failure here! Unfortunately any type of drug addiction makes the person really selfish,as you have found. There are lots of support groups if you google,which will give you some much needed emotional support.

As said above,get onto CAB or national debtline re your debts. The mortgage company ay give you some breathing space,as the government has encouraged them to do so. I know that Abbey have been very supportive to me,a year on although I have arrears they are allowing me to pay £50 a month off them and not charging interest.
You should be getting working AND Child tax credits. I wouldn't give up my job if I was you-it may be the only thing keeping you sane!
I'm sorry I can't answer all questions,however I don't think you will be eligible for rehousing until you are forced to move from the house,which could take several
months with the rates of reposession at the moment.

You may want to come over onto this thread where you will find lots of women rebuilding their lives after various misbehaviours by their men!

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=1495091&page=33

jlb1910

Thank you all so much for your replies. This is a very difficult time and I know there are loads of us out there in horrible situations and sharing and supporting each other is a valuable gift.

Thank you so much

fairydiamond

Hope you can sort everything out.

brimau_2

Two and a half years ago my husband suddenly decided that he did not love me anymore and left. The worst of that was that I had a four year old daughter and nowhere to live as we were all set within a 3 week span to fly off to a new life overseas. He went alone, and I was left homeless, no job, no childcare and my nearest family were 300 miles away. He also left me with debts I could not possibly pay and so therefore had to declare myself bankrupt. Not surprisingly i had a breakdown. Its been horrific (putting it mildly) but I am still here, my daughter is blooming and we are doing very well. I am about to go back to work and i hold my head up high, for although I scraped along...I did it.

You can too. Be stubborn, be strong and just keep looking forwards. We are all here for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!