Am I being too positive???

bankruptedbunny

Hi all

I've been lurking for a few weeks, trying to pluck up courage to do something about my awful situation, I'm sure a lot of you will identify with this. Now I've looked into it all, and taken CCCS advice, it doesn't seem as bad as i thought it would be to get out of this mess.

Basically, I've split up with my partner, we have a gorgeous 9 month old baby girl, and a hideous mortgage - £1500 a month, £600 a month child care, and I'm still legally having to put most of my now part time wages towards a mortgage for a house I don't even live in (I'm staying with my parents). We also have a £60k secured loan, which is costing a further £500 a month, as well as a debt mgt plan for £26k so we really have no choice but to go bankrupt.

Since watching the board, and talking to CCCS, I'm actually feeling quite positive about it all. Someone said on this forum that it's really not that big a deal, it writes everything off and gives you a fresh start. It's kind of my light at the end of the tunnel, even if i'm slapped with an IPA I'll still be better off than i am now - i can't even afford nappies and formula at the moment, my wonderful parents are footing the bill for absolutely everything. I've been putting of telling work incase I get sacked, but I just spoke to them and of course I won't lose my job, and in fact they were extremely sympathetic.

The CCCS advisor told me that it's perfectly legitimate for us to stop paying the mortgage for 3 months as we'll lose the house anyway, (and frankly I don't care anymore) so that we can both raise the funds for rent deposit, advance rent, whatever furniture we need, etc. I'm not passing this on as advice to anyone, just sharing what they told me, because i still can't believe that this is the case. I know it must be true if that's what they said, but it just seems too good to be true, and too easy. i know I won't be able to get credit etc for 6 years, but I don't want any more after the mess we've gotten ourselves into, thanks very much!

I feel really guilty for feeling positive about it now I know i'll be able to afford a nice new home for me and my baby girl, but i have been through hell and back with losing my partner and therefore little family and home etc. I don't mean to take it lightly or be flippant about it.

So, I think what i'm really trying to ask is whether i'm being far too positive about the whole thing, and whether there are any awful shocks in store for me that i haven't yet considered? What horrendous experiences have you had so that I can prepare myself?

Thanks.

peachyprice

Hi bankruptbunny,

As you've already resigned yourself to the fact that the house has to go there's really nothing else to fear.

The advice you've received to stop paying the mortgage and secured loan are absolutely correct, also stop paying all your other creditors too now that you've made the decision.

The worst that can happen now is that people will start to send you letters and phoning you to ask where their money is. Once you're actually BR all this will stop and no-one can ask you for a penny.

The only other thing you might lose is a car, if you have one, but if it's needed to get to work there's a good chance it will be safe.


I can honestly say since we went BR in March there have been no nasty shocks at all, our quality of life really is so much better.

So just look ahead to the day you're out of this mess and you can have a fresh new start and a happy relaxed mummy for your baby girl.

Anything else you're worried about, just ask, there's always someone around to answer questions, no matter how small they seem to you.

Debt_Monkey_3

You should be positive. Bankruptcy is a positive move. You can see light at the end of the tunnel.

GettingHopeful

Hi Bunny, Lots of love for you and your gorgeous baby, it will be fine, BR is indeed a fresh start, I thought there would be an awful stigma, but friends and family have stuck by me, and though it has been in the newspaper, anyone would have had to look very hard to find it.

I sort of had to make peace with myself, as the thought of not paying my debts was horrific, but it was impossible for me to do so. Everyone deserves a second chance, and I have slept better since the BR than any night the seven months before.

You are absolutely right to feel positive. It will all be OK.

k2nga

Yep seems like you got the right advice and now you made the decision you can start to look forward to your new life. I wish you all the best and do keep us informed about your journey as it helps others.

bankruptedbunny

thank you all for your support and kind words. thought i was over the emotion, but that really brought a lump to my throat. Can't tell you what a relief it is to hear that there really is light at the end of the tunnel and that you've had positive life changes. have just booked to view some houses to rent!
xx