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  • FIRST POST
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 14th Dec 17, 6:08 PM
    • 6,331Posts
    • 23,101Thanks
    Uniscots97
    Back, still in debt, probably depressed and not a lot going right!!!
    • #1
    • 14th Dec 17, 6:08 PM
    Back, still in debt, probably depressed and not a lot going right!!! 14th Dec 17 at 6:08 PM
    Where do I start? I left the forums a while back as had so much going on (birth of my LO, an accident that changed my health, death of 2 family members and lots of job stuff). I'm back now as I need some help and support from people that aren't connected to everything that's going on.

    I'll post more details as I go but in a nutshell:

    - trying to get house done up to sell (OH doing it or supposed to be doing it and taking ages over everything)
    - got another house but have to pay back share that was left to other family members (once larger house sold should be mortgage free)
    - getting no support from OH, he swings from self pity to nothing
    - I pay all the bills (including LO nursery fees as I work full time). OH varies how much he gives me per month but I'm currently paying his car loan (taken out in my name) and paying bills on 2 houses (my mum trying to help) and all my debts. 1 credit card nearly gone (sub £1000) but have others
    - have nightmare of a boss who put me on a warning (along with others) because he didn't tell us right thing to work on in first place (and constantly changes his mind) and awaiting a letter from HR about how my review will go. No instructions from him written down so difficult to prove stuff but thinking about involving Union
    - boss told friend (colleague) at work we're too friendly. She got no training from boss, all left to me and others.
    - OH complaining about everything, nothing is ever good enough. We're both full of the cold at the moment yet you would think he was at deaths door. Disappears off for a sleep whenever he likes if I say anything he blows up, and I get left to deal with LO.
    - my health hasn't been same since an accident, left me with a lot of problems below the waist, on a lot of medication

    Sorry needed to vent. I broke down in tears a couple of days ago (OH wasn't in) and LO asked if Mummy needed a hug.

    I'm not as strong as I was years ago when I first came on here. But so much as happened. I think if I was debt free I might find things a bit easier. I'll pull together numbers etc as I go. But I have managed to pay for Christmas all upfront.

    Thank you for listening 😊, I feel a little better getting some of this off my chest.
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
Page 5
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 13th Jan 18, 1:42 PM
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    Uniscots97
    LO been unwell, OH still feeling unwell and me?.... yep I'm ill too but still doing washing, cleaning etc. Worked at home a day but so tired. My Mum came over to give me a rest and keep LO occupied and OH moaned about her being here and basically told him to mind his own. A friend did my hair for me and I talked things through with her, she knows him and said 'you can only take so much'.

    Meeting went ahead and union was really good, I'm waiting for the outcome and in the meantime the Union are speaking to HR on my behalf (basically saying my health was never taken into account when I've been open and honest yet a lot of my file has 'disappeared'). So fingers crossed it all works out ok.

    Got letter through saying my mortgage payment is going down by £20 a month. Not a lot but it all helps.
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • horseygirl2014
    • By horseygirl2014 13th Jan 18, 2:28 PM
    • 88 Posts
    • 450 Thanks
    horseygirl2014
    Having read most of the posts (as i'm sure i've missed some ) it really sounds like your having a rough time of it.
    Glad to hear that your mum popped in to look after LO (bet she loved spending time with her anyway!)
    Your friend is right - you can only take so much - and it sounds (to me anyway) like things need to come to ahead with your OH. It sounds like he has his problems - as many people do - but it doesn't sound like its a family home to me, You have the security of a roof over your head (if i've read right) and could manage financially on a budget. But it sounds like he is spending your - and your LO's money when hes spent his own, and doesn't ever put money back in the piggy bank. It also sounds like he needs to look at how he talks to you, and treats you.

    Anyhow - how rubbish that your all unwell. For me, it always makes me feel like everything takes twice as long. However this years motto for myself is Just Do It! its actually given me the kick up the bum to get stuff done. Some days - even getting out of bed....

    Glad you've got someone (the union rep) in your corner about work - having someone to help you fight your battle (which it sounds like it is!) must def be helping.

    £20.00 a month is def an improvement on the mortgage - tiny acorns - big oaks ect! and i bet its nice to see the CC going down.

    Take care Uniscots97 xx
    Missing my money saving mojo.

    39.13/100/month - January 2018 make £10/day
    • jaxsmar
    • By jaxsmar 13th Jan 18, 7:02 PM
    • 390 Posts
    • 1,538 Thanks
    jaxsmar
    Make sure your mental health is being addressed. I hope you make time to go out with your friend's, sometimes just to off load your fears, concerns even if its just for a coffee. Even the strongest of people can suffer depression. Hope you start to feel better soon.
    Penny wise pound foolish #266 emergency fund 50/£1000.
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 14th Jan 18, 11:56 AM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    I'll be glad to get paid soon. Spent a bit more in Aldi's than I meant to. LO wanted a magazine but at £6!!! I had to say no. I can't believe how much kids magazines are. LO kicked off saying please, I compromised and got LO a colouring book at £2. I also treated myself to some nice coffee. Feeling a bit brighter today and slightly less tired. I forgot to take my shopping bags so had to pay for bags ��. I know it's not a lot but it will mount up.

    Got my statement through for the small cc that's nearly paid off. Not sure whether it's a lightbulb moment/realisation or whatever but couldn't believe it when I read the minimum payment of nearly £20 and the added interest is the same!!! for a balance of under £180 (before interest was added this month)!! The sooner I get rid of that cc the better.
    Last edited by Uniscots97; 14-01-2018 at 12:19 PM.
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 15th Jan 18, 8:12 PM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    Anyone else got snow?
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • nonnie44
    • By nonnie44 15th Jan 18, 9:14 PM
    • 431 Posts
    • 724 Thanks
    nonnie44
    Not yet but it’s forecast here overnight and most of tomorrow, I’m on the west coast xx
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 15th Jan 18, 9:39 PM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    It's started snowing here, hoping it doesn't come to anything
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 16th Jan 18, 8:40 AM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    Payment made on smallest cc, balance now £110. It's nice to see an end in sight to this one!!
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • Tahlullah
    • By Tahlullah 17th Jan 18, 8:18 AM
    • 831 Posts
    • 4,759 Thanks
    Tahlullah
    Congratulations on seeing the light at the end of the tunnel on this CC.

    Tx
    Striving to be mortgage free.
    2018 MFW #135

    £100 of £2000
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 17th Jan 18, 8:45 AM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    Another item sold, profit £18.40! Just about to go pay it to my cc.
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 18th Jan 18, 9:18 AM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    Meeting with work and union today, wish me luck!!
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • anna_1977
    • By anna_1977 18th Jan 18, 10:05 AM
    • 607 Posts
    • 859 Thanks
    anna_1977
    Good luck Uniscots97 - read your thread yesterday, sounds like you're having a horrible time. Get work sorted then address the rest one thing at a time
    • Tahlullah
    • By Tahlullah 18th Jan 18, 6:10 PM
    • 831 Posts
    • 4,759 Thanks
    Tahlullah
    Hope the meeting went ok.

    Tx
    Striving to be mortgage free.
    2018 MFW #135

    £100 of £2000
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 18th Jan 18, 6:33 PM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    Meeting went ok, got formal apology for way previous boss treated my illness and surgery, they have said they want to keep an eye on my work for next 6 weeks as some important stuff going on. They've also the small pay rise I should have got last year (by time I pay tax etc it'll cover my tv license). My boss said HR have said certain wording go on my file that he said he doesn't agree with. He said this after union rep left so going to ask rep about it. I'm just glad it's almost over.
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • Little Miss Winner
    • By Little Miss Winner 18th Jan 18, 10:57 PM
    • 3,991 Posts
    • 135,969 Thanks
    Little Miss Winner
    Just caught up with your diary - im going to subscribe. You are doing really well with everything at the moment.
    Just thought I'd pop by with a virtual hug if nothing else.

    Take Care x
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 19th Jan 18, 9:55 AM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    Smallest cc down to £87.87!!! after making payment of £5.
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
    • bertiewhite
    • By bertiewhite 19th Jan 18, 10:44 AM
    • 772 Posts
    • 823 Thanks
    bertiewhite
    LO wanted a magazine but at £6!!!
    Originally posted by Uniscots97
    What does "LO" stand for?
    • consultant31
    • By consultant31 19th Jan 18, 12:05 PM
    • 4,734 Posts
    • 14,431 Thanks
    consultant31
    What does "LO" stand for?
    Originally posted by bertiewhite
    LO = Little one (child)
    I let my mind wander and it never came back!
    • jaxsmar
    • By jaxsmar 19th Jan 18, 8:24 PM
    • 390 Posts
    • 1,538 Thanks
    jaxsmar
    How did you feel about watching your work for six weeks? Some good things came from your meeting. Plus your making payments off cc. I hope your feeling better.
    Penny wise pound foolish #266 emergency fund 50/£1000.
    • Uniscots97
    • By Uniscots97 20th Jan 18, 5:11 PM
    • 6,331 Posts
    • 23,101 Thanks
    Uniscots97
    I don't feel great about it Jaxs but it's a better outcome than I thought before I got the union involved.

    I am feeling a lot better. One of my friends got me a new little present ��, a new little notebook for my bag for shopping lists etc. Trying to reduce what I spend on food (doing not too bad at Aldi's and Lidl's) but I do waste quite a bit. Also trying to take bags with me when I buy anything but not doing great with that one only remembered them 2 or 3 times since the beginning of the year. It might only be 5p per bag but trying to put aside what I save etc in a jar. So far I've saved 75p in bag charges.
    CC1 = £87.87 (£9983 ); Reusing shopping bags savings =£1.05 vs spent £0.70 .Wine is like opera. You can enjoy it even if you don't understand it and too much can give you a headache the next day J
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