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  • FIRST POST
    • 117pauline
    • By 117pauline 4th Dec 17, 4:00 PM
    • 462Posts
    • 5,655Thanks
    117pauline
    Mindful or Mind full?
    • #1
    • 4th Dec 17, 4:00 PM
    Mindful or Mind full? 4th Dec 17 at 4:00 PM
    So....... life appears to have changed today!

    I came downstairs to a letter from my partner saying he needed time away. After 11 plus years. Not sure how I feel.

    At the moment I need to get a job. Not as easy as that sounds as I have quite a problem leaving the house at all. I am waiting to get to the top of the list for some CBT help. I also have some chronic conditions too which have hindered our relationship.

    As you can imagine, I am not sure what will happen. My plan is to do nothing rash but try to pay down my loan as much as possible. Then I am going to have to find somewhere to live etc.

    I did say I was going to start a diary so I think this is one hell of a way to get started!

    Pauline
    Don't get it perfect - Get it going
    Better Than Before
Page 2
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 6th Dec 17, 7:20 AM
    • 905 Posts
    • 4,602 Thanks
    Cumbria lass
    Pauline well done for getting out again and eating well. It's early days yet so slowly but surely is the way to go.

    Your partner may just need some time alone , I hope you manage to sort it out.

    Have a good day .
    Nov 2017 CC1 £3329 CC2 £600

    Debt Free Nov 2019: earlier if I have my way
    • Pauper1
    • By Pauper1 6th Dec 17, 7:26 AM
    • 287 Posts
    • 2,357 Thanks
    Pauper1
    Oh Pauline, like the others I was so pleased to see a diary from you, but not under these circumstances. What a shock it must have been for you! I'm glad you are prioritising taking care of yourself and feeling a bit positive.
    DMP start 1st May 2014 - £22,850 £39,349.41 Original DFD from Stepchange 6th Sept 2039... Aiming for 1st Nov 2026
    Priorities changed, sold our house, going through the settlement process and hope to be debt free by Christmas 2017
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 6th Dec 17, 9:12 AM
    • 624 Posts
    • 3,535 Thanks
    redofromstart
    I always feed the birds too - I can see the feeders from my desk in the dining room and from the kitchen which (between the two) is where I spend most of my awake time. What else costs pennies, isn't bad for you and gives so much pleasure in return?
    • 117pauline
    • By 117pauline 6th Dec 17, 2:49 PM
    • 462 Posts
    • 5,655 Thanks
    117pauline
    Thanks everyone, your kindness brought tears to the eyes. Good tears though.

    My birds bring so much pleasure along with the squirrels. We seem to have only one coming to call instead of the three we had earlier in the year. The house backs on to a park and I've been watching him this morning, using the wire fence as an outdoor gym.

    Not quite so positive today as I have an appointment with my GP in a couple of hours. I know I have to be honest but everything is in limbo. She is brilliant though and will support me. I have written a list of things to discuss.

    I am doing stuff in the advert breaks as it seems a way to get done. My laptop has developed a weird problem - it will only attach to the internet for one operation then stops responding. I have managed to send my CV and all the notes to my tablet. So that needs some work today.
    Don't get it perfect - Get it going
    Better Than Before
    • Plush
    • By Plush 6th Dec 17, 3:26 PM
    • 80 Posts
    • 188 Thanks
    Plush
    Just came across your thread pauline - so sorry to hear. Life's a never-ending sequence of good things and bad things, hope you find enough good in your life to help you cope with this one.

    Hugs.

    PS. Congrats for taking the courage to discuss with your GP. I don't have it..
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 6th Dec 17, 4:12 PM
    • 49,035 Posts
    • 182,067 Thanks
    beanielou
    Glad that you are okish.
    YOu will get plenty of support here.
    Take care of you xx
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 6th Dec 17, 4:13 PM
    • 49,035 Posts
    • 182,067 Thanks
    beanielou
    Hope your GP appointment went well xx
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • fay66
    • By fay66 6th Dec 17, 5:40 PM
    • 664 Posts
    • 1,579 Thanks
    fay66
    Glad your ok
    Inland revenue £4500=
    Loan £2610
    Pay day loans - 135+600+300+300
    Credit card 1 - 5186
    CC2 -1038
    CC3 - 548 cc4 234
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 6th Dec 17, 9:18 PM
    • 4,732 Posts
    • 28,183 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Hi Pauline, glad you finally started a diary but sorry to hear you've started off with bad news re OH. However, you've rolled your sleeves up and are getting things sorted which is good to hear.

    You'll get plenty of support here so you made the right decision starting a diary.

    Onwards and upwards
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 7th Dec 17, 12:42 AM
    • 955 Posts
    • 4,297 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Found you! ...and joining your supporters and cheerleaders.

    Lucky you, having squirrels around.
    • 117pauline
    • By 117pauline 7th Dec 17, 1:46 AM
    • 462 Posts
    • 5,655 Thanks
    117pauline
    Yes, I know I should be asleep however......

    Useful GP appointment and she was very supportive. Changed some medicine dosages. She wants to see me before and after Christmas so I don't feel alone with the struggles.

    Spent the evening doing Qmee surveys which brought in about five pounds.

    List for Thursday
    • 2 walks of at least 20 minutes
    • 20 mins gardening if weather permits
    • prepare pineapple, orange and apples for fruit salad
    • prepare coleslaw and salad
    • eat porridge for breakfast
    • 20 mins cleaning
    • 20 mins CV tweaking
    • send e-mail to friend in Spain
    • write 10 Christmas cards

    If I list here I am hoping to get these things done

    Small steps to a better 2018
    Pauline
    Don't get it perfect - Get it going
    Better Than Before
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 7th Dec 17, 6:34 AM
    • 905 Posts
    • 4,602 Thanks
    Cumbria lass
    Your to do list looks very manageable , I hope you achieve it all today. Your doctor was very helpful and listened which is good.

    Which fruit do you find best to eat ? I love fruit but am being careful at the moment which I eat.

    Have a good day .
    Nov 2017 CC1 £3329 CC2 £600

    Debt Free Nov 2019: earlier if I have my way
    • maggiem
    • By maggiem 7th Dec 17, 7:01 AM
    • 327 Posts
    • 2,085 Thanks
    maggiem
    Very sorry to read he news re OH, I hope it gives you both time to think through what you want. Well done on all the positive steps you have taken. Hope you sleep better tonight too
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 7th Dec 17, 7:28 AM
    • 2,248 Posts
    • 10,847 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Thst sounds like a very positive list Pauline .

    Have you had a chance to make plans for Christmas? Do you have family or friends that you can spend it with?

    I'm glad your GP was helpful. It's important to get all the help that is on offer.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt in July 2017 = £58,766 DEBT FREE 31 October 2017
    NEW GOALS - Build an Emergency Fund & Loss of Income Fund
    Emergency Fund 1 = £818/Emergency Fund 2 = £203.76
    • Mudbath
    • By Mudbath 7th Dec 17, 7:34 AM
    • 5,399 Posts
    • 112,644 Thanks
    Mudbath
    Didn't want to read and run. I'm another one who feeds the birds and can lose myself in watching their antics on the bird feeder. I often find it's these simple things that help most when things are difficult. Loving your positive attitude. Virtual hugs to you.
    • UncannyScot
    • By UncannyScot 7th Dec 17, 8:18 AM
    • 886 Posts
    • 5,136 Thanks
    UncannyScot
    Morning

    Nice and positive outlook and great to hear that your GP is supportive
    Great idea with maintaining the task list, helps focus... I do this too

    Have a lovely day
    BUGGRITMILLENIUMHANDANDSHRIMP I TOLD EM! - Foul Ole Ron
    It is important that we know where we come from, because if you do not know where you come from, then you do not know where you are, and if you don't know where you are, then you don't know where you are going. If you don't know where you're going, you're probably going wrong.
    R.I.P. T.P.
    • WannabeFree
    • By WannabeFree 7th Dec 17, 9:41 AM
    • 421 Posts
    • 2,906 Thanks
    WannabeFree
    Morning,

    Finally found you

    Sorry to hear things are difficult, remember you can and will do this! We are all here to cheer you on. Just look at how much you've done already!

    Hope you have a good day today x
    “Once you hit rock bottom, that's where you perfectly stand; That's your chance of restarting, but restarting the right way.”
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 7th Dec 17, 11:33 AM
    • 49,035 Posts
    • 182,067 Thanks
    beanielou
    So glad that your GP is supportive.
    Take care.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 7th Dec 17, 12:13 PM
    • 955 Posts
    • 4,297 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    What a lovely list! A balanced list, if you see what I mean. Caring for you and building your support structures.

    You have reminded me to make overnight oats to eat at work. Why cold porridge brings me joy even in winter, I do no know! Unless it's the summer fruit I add to it...
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 7th Dec 17, 9:52 PM
    • 4,732 Posts
    • 28,183 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Good that you have such a supportive GP

    Like you say, small steps ....
    Virtual Sealed Pot 2018 £20.70
    December 3 NSD
    Weight loss 2/7lbs
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
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