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  • FIRST POST
    • affordmylife
    • By affordmylife 16th Sep 17, 6:11 PM
    • 1,190Posts
    • 3,521Thanks
    affordmylife
    Left my husband
    • #1
    • 16th Sep 17, 6:11 PM
    Left my husband 16th Sep 17 at 6:11 PM
    Last Saturday I'd just had enough so I went to sat at my parents.

    I'm 50. We've been together 23 years. Five children. Youngest 18 next week.

    First few days I was all strong and happy. Last few days can't stop crying. I'm a mess.

    What to do???

    No idea x
    £4,000 personal debt

    £500/£4,000 12.5% paid off. It's a start.
Page 1
    • IAmWales
    • By IAmWales 16th Sep 17, 6:15 PM
    • 1,625 Posts
    • 3,344 Thanks
    IAmWales
    • #2
    • 16th Sep 17, 6:15 PM
    • #2
    • 16th Sep 17, 6:15 PM
    Keep yourself busy.

    Lots of ideas on this thread.
    • affordmylife
    • By affordmylife 16th Sep 17, 6:18 PM
    • 1,190 Posts
    • 3,521 Thanks
    affordmylife
    • #3
    • 16th Sep 17, 6:18 PM
    • #3
    • 16th Sep 17, 6:18 PM
    You link me to my own thread?
    £4,000 personal debt

    £500/£4,000 12.5% paid off. It's a start.
    • tacpot12
    • By tacpot12 16th Sep 17, 10:44 PM
    • 735 Posts
    • 634 Thanks
    tacpot12
    • #4
    • 16th Sep 17, 10:44 PM
    • #4
    • 16th Sep 17, 10:44 PM
    You are grieving over the loss of your most deeply held hopes and dreams; it's going to hurt for a long time. But you will survive. I've been there. It hurts like hell, but it won't kill you; I promise.

    So, cry, think, wish and hope some more. Talk to your children; and explain that you're confused and unsure and worried; and that you need their love and time to think, and reassure them that you love them and will be there for them - even if this might not be how you feel right at the time you are talking to them - you will find a way to grieve for yourself and to support them.

    Talk to your friends about what has happened; but don't rush to conclusions. Take time to think about what you want, and what can be done.

    I hope you move through this period of intense pain quickly, but know you may not because of how important your marriage is to you. It hurts because it was real, and hard and produced the children you love.

    Best wishes for the future

    tp
    • marliepanda
    • By marliepanda 20th Sep 17, 11:57 AM
    • 4,777 Posts
    • 9,617 Thanks
    marliepanda
    • #5
    • 20th Sep 17, 11:57 AM
    • #5
    • 20th Sep 17, 11:57 AM
    You link me to my own thread?
    Originally posted by affordmylife
    A thread where lots of people gave you ideas on keeping yourself busy, tailored to you, because its your thread...
    Survey Earnings 2017 - £163
    • FreeBear
    • By FreeBear 20th Sep 17, 12:56 PM
    • 1,367 Posts
    • 1,924 Thanks
    FreeBear
    • #6
    • 20th Sep 17, 12:56 PM
    • #6
    • 20th Sep 17, 12:56 PM
    Go and book an appointment with your GP practice - Ask for the GP (or nurse) that deals with mental health issues. It sounds like depression is kicking in, and it is always good to talk to someone impartial.
    Her courage will change the world.

    Treasure the moments that you have. Savour them for as long as you can for they will never come back again.
    • Oakie
    • By Oakie 20th Sep 17, 5:22 PM
    • 74 Posts
    • 149 Thanks
    Oakie
    • #7
    • 20th Sep 17, 5:22 PM
    • #7
    • 20th Sep 17, 5:22 PM
    menopause maybe..
    • indianabones
    • By indianabones 27th Sep 17, 12:26 PM
    • 193 Posts
    • 198 Thanks
    indianabones
    • #8
    • 27th Sep 17, 12:26 PM
    • #8
    • 27th Sep 17, 12:26 PM
    How does your husband feel? Did you split on mutual terms?

    Time is the greatest healer.
    • mummyofboys1985
    • By mummyofboys1985 29th Sep 17, 7:20 PM
    • 52 Posts
    • 2 Thanks
    mummyofboys1985
    • #9
    • 29th Sep 17, 7:20 PM
    • #9
    • 29th Sep 17, 7:20 PM
    It takes a few days for things to really sink in I find and that’s when the emotions start. If your 1000% sure this is what you want then only time will help. Try keep your mind busy and focus on what you want in your future, xx
    • lillie421
    • By lillie421 10th Oct 17, 3:11 PM
    • 44 Posts
    • 22 Thanks
    lillie421
    It does take time for you to get used to that as it is a huge change. Take time to think if this really is what you want and try to talk to him about how you both feel.
    Do the things you enjoy doing and keep yourself busy. Change is hard but sometimes it needs to be done.
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