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  • FIRST POST
    • manislactating
    • By manislactating 10th Sep 17, 6:57 PM
    • 16Posts
    • 10Thanks
    manislactating
    Not allowed to have a poo?
    • #1
    • 10th Sep 17, 6:57 PM
    Not allowed to have a poo? 10th Sep 17 at 6:57 PM
    My friend does a shift in a diary working on a production line. In her contract, it explicitly says that any breaks outside of lunch (45 minutes) has to be authorized by her line manager. Well, she doesn't get along that well with him. Apparently, he became nasty once she announced she was pregnant with her 4th child. I don't know if it's because he thinks she's trying to fiddle maternity leave or what. There's a nasty rumor that when she had her miscarriage it was her fault and self induced because she wanted the pregnancy only as an excuse to getting a 'free' holiday (in the managers words, apparently)

    Any way, back to the question...the reason I ask this is because she heavily soiled herself (number 2) after being refused. She even told her manager that she needed to POO. Unfortunately, after soiling herself she had to stand there for a further 30 minutes until her nasty line manager came along. It was only when the two colleagues who stand beside her were gagging due to the smell that the line manager came along and let her go to the toilet and clean up. All in all a very humiliating experience, she's in floods of tears today.

    What should she do? And no, she can't afford to just leave the job. She's got no partner to support her or her kids and no other job lined up. JSA etc wouldn't cover her expenses plus she's very proud and doesn't want to be a scrounger.
    Last edited by manislactating; 10-09-2017 at 7:02 PM.
Page 1
    • jobbingmusician
    • By jobbingmusician 10th Sep 17, 7:12 PM
    • 18,689 Posts
    • 18,974 Thanks
    jobbingmusician
    • #2
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:12 PM
    • #2
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:12 PM
    It sounds to me as if she should raise a grievance against her manager (and possibly make a report to http://www.hse.gov.uk/contact/concerns.htm

    (I don't want someone processing my dairy products - assuming that is what you meant to type - who has soiled herself and I think the HSE may well agree.....)
    I'm the Board Guide on the Matched Betting; Referrers and Jobseeking & Training boards. I'm a volunteer to help the boards run smoothly, and I can move and merge posts there. Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.

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    • Zinger549
    • By Zinger549 10th Sep 17, 7:13 PM
    • 952 Posts
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    Zinger549
    • #3
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:13 PM
    • #3
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:13 PM
    Is she a member of a union. They might be able to offer her some advice.
    addict
    Come on you Irons
    • sangie595
    • By sangie595 10th Sep 17, 7:22 PM
    • 3,723 Posts
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    sangie595
    • #4
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:22 PM
    • #4
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:22 PM
    My friend does a shift in a diary working on a production line. In her contract, it explicitly says that any breaks outside of lunch (45 minutes) has to be authorized by her line manager. Well, she doesn't get along that well with him. Apparently, he became nasty once she announced she was pregnant with her 4th child. I don't know if it's because he thinks she's trying to fiddle maternity leave or what. There's a nasty rumor that when she had her miscarriage it was her fault and self induced because she wanted the pregnancy only as an excuse to getting a 'free' holiday (in the managers words, apparently)

    Any way, back to the question...the reason I ask this is because she heavily soiled herself (number 2) after being refused. She even told her manager that she needed to POO. Unfortunately, after soiling herself she had to stand there for a further 30 minutes until her nasty line manager came along. It was only when the two colleagues who stand beside her were gagging due to the smell that the line manager came along and let her go to the toilet and clean up. All in all a very humiliating experience, she's in floods of tears today.

    What should she do? And no, she can't afford to just leave the job. She's got no partner to support her or her kids and no other job lined up. JSA etc wouldn't cover her expenses plus she's very proud and doesn't want to be a scrounger.
    Originally posted by manislactating
    There's no explicit law. It would be better if she posted herself instead of through you. It's impossible to give much good advice through a third party.
    • xapprenticex
    • By xapprenticex 10th Sep 17, 7:24 PM
    • 1,194 Posts
    • 1,102 Thanks
    xapprenticex
    • #5
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:24 PM
    • #5
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:24 PM
    4th child and single before its born..........

    but yeah what happened at work was bad, i would have been too humiliated to return. actually i would have just went toilet, even if it cost me my job, but i dont have 3 children with another on the way while single, so i could risk losing my job over not soiling myself.
    Last edited by xapprenticex; 10-09-2017 at 7:26 PM.
    • sangie595
    • By sangie595 10th Sep 17, 7:35 PM
    • 3,723 Posts
    • 6,098 Thanks
    sangie595
    • #6
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:35 PM
    • #6
    • 10th Sep 17, 7:35 PM
    4th child and single before its born..........

    but yeah what happened at work was bad, i would have been too humiliated to return. actually i would have just went toilet, even if it cost me my job, but i dont have 3 children with another on the way while single, so i could risk losing my job over not soiling myself.
    Originally posted by xapprenticex
    Wind it back. You have NO evidence to say that she has three children whilst single. Never heard of divorce? Or cheating....? And even if she did. So what? There is no law that says you must be married or in a "stable" ( whatever that means) relationship. Parental responsibility or marital status had nothing whatsoever to do with this question.
    • xapprenticex
    • By xapprenticex 10th Sep 17, 8:21 PM
    • 1,194 Posts
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    xapprenticex
    • #7
    • 10th Sep 17, 8:21 PM
    • #7
    • 10th Sep 17, 8:21 PM
    Wind it back. You have NO evidence to say that she has three children whilst single.
    Originally posted by sangie595
    OP said she has a 4th child on the way and is single. In my books that means she has a 4th child on the way and is single.

    As for not being 100% on point with regard to the question, look at 90% of the threads here and complain there too.
    • sangie595
    • By sangie595 10th Sep 17, 8:42 PM
    • 3,723 Posts
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    sangie595
    • #8
    • 10th Sep 17, 8:42 PM
    • #8
    • 10th Sep 17, 8:42 PM
    OP said she has a 4th child on the way and is single. In my books that means she has a 4th child on the way and is single.

    As for not being 100% on point with regard to the question, look at 90% of the threads here and complain there too.
    Originally posted by xapprenticex
    OP s friend is working. Please explain to me... Even if they were not working, what law says that you cannot have children? "Single" is irrelevant. Or, if it had any relevance at all, the question might be better placed as "what responsibility is the man taking?".

    Perhaps you don't consider human dignity in the workplace to be important. But that has nothing to do with how many children someone has or their marital status. Would it somehow be ok if they were allowed to take a poo when married?
    • IAmWales
    • By IAmWales 10th Sep 17, 8:52 PM
    • 1,223 Posts
    • 2,586 Thanks
    IAmWales
    • #9
    • 10th Sep 17, 8:52 PM
    • #9
    • 10th Sep 17, 8:52 PM
    You're arguing over a poo troll guys!
    • Nicki
    • By Nicki 10th Sep 17, 8:53 PM
    • 7,508 Posts
    • 26,275 Thanks
    Nicki
    Been a few poo related threads by first time posters on this forum previously, which don't usually end well. I'm sure they are all genuine...
    • Kynthia
    • By Kynthia 10th Sep 17, 9:24 PM
    • 4,963 Posts
    • 6,935 Thanks
    Kynthia
    Even when it's completely irrelevant some people on this forum can't help but judge and comment about someone despite not knowing their full circumstances. Someone being pregnant in less than an ideal situation really seems to irk some people here and they feel the need to make sure the person concerned knows it. Possibly 40% of pregnancies are unplanned in the UK yet only those in more vulnerable circumstances will be judged for this. Plus what about those who'll never be in ideal circumstances, should they never have children, and who gets to decide at what point the circumstances become too far from the ideal for this to be the case?

    OP, I don't know for sure what can be done but it seems like there's bullying by the line manager, possibly pregnancy related when pregnancy is a protected characteristic in the Equalities Act. I don't know if there's illegal discrimination, does the line manager treat her worse than other staff members? Plus surely the company could get in trouble regarding the hygiene aspect on the production line so I would expect the more senior management to be very concerned about that at least. If the lady concerned can't talk to a union rep the will she take a chance complaining to senior management? Would colleagues like yourself back up her story?
    Don't listen to me, I'm no expert!
    • LilElvis
    • By LilElvis 10th Sep 17, 9:25 PM
    • 3,089 Posts
    • 8,570 Thanks
    LilElvis
    Been a few poo related threads by first time posters on this forum previously, which don't usually end well. I'm sure they are all genuine...
    Originally posted by Nicki
    They've been from "primary school teachers" and "parents" regarding their "pupils / children ". This is a different slant.
    • Nicki
    • By Nicki 10th Sep 17, 9:32 PM
    • 7,508 Posts
    • 26,275 Thanks
    Nicki
    They've been from "primary school teachers" and "parents" regarding their "pupils / children ". This is a different slant.
    Originally posted by LilElvis
    There have also been some on employment board. The poster who said he pooed in the lift, and the one who claimed someone had made a mess in the disabled toilet are two which spring immediately to mind,
    • pinkshoes
    • By pinkshoes 10th Sep 17, 9:46 PM
    • 15,177 Posts
    • 20,633 Thanks
    pinkshoes
    Surely people can hold a poo in for a couple of hours??????????

    Even 32 weeks pregnant with twins I never once had to escape from teaching a lesson for en emergency poo!!

    Personally if it was that desperate I would have walked off!
    Should've = Should HAVE (not 'of')
    Would've = Would HAVE (not 'of')

    No, I am not perfect, but yes I do judge people on their use of basic English language. If you didn't know the above, then learn it! (If English is your second language, then you are forgiven!)
    • sangie595
    • By sangie595 10th Sep 17, 9:58 PM
    • 3,723 Posts
    • 6,098 Thanks
    sangie595
    Surely people can hold a poo in for a couple of hours??????????

    Even 32 weeks pregnant with twins I never once had to escape from teaching a lesson for en emergency poo!!

    Personally if it was that desperate I would have walked off!
    Originally posted by pinkshoes
    Nice for you. I'm not pregnant. But I have a disability which means I have to take drugs that impact on my bowels. What a shame everyone isn't like you. If you've never had to hold it in, when the need to go is desperate- no you can't f*** ing "hold it in," for a couple of hours!
    • sangie595
    • By sangie595 10th Sep 17, 10:02 PM
    • 3,723 Posts
    • 6,098 Thanks
    sangie595
    You're arguing over a poo troll guys!
    Originally posted by IAmWales
    So? What? If not real, then some of us are wasting some time. If true (and this sort of situation actually isn't uncommon,) then real advice helps others if not this person. It might seem funny. It might not be true. This time. But this does actually happen...
    • nicechap
    • By nicechap 10th Sep 17, 10:16 PM
    • 762 Posts
    • 1,831 Thanks
    nicechap
    The OP's friend should get a doctor's note saying she needs to be allowed to go to the toilet when she has to.

    I presume all the milk was thrown away after the OP's friend poo'd herself for health & safety reasons? If not, was HSE informed?
    Quote was right and saw into the future.
    • steampowered
    • By steampowered 10th Sep 17, 10:34 PM
    • 1,685 Posts
    • 1,611 Thanks
    steampowered
    Surely this is a Health and Safety issue.

    The Health and Safety at Work Act 1974 requires all employers to ensure the health, safety and welfare of their employees.

    The Workplace (Health, Safety and Welfare) Regulations 1992 states that sanitary conveniences should be 'readily accessible'.

    Preventing an employee from going to the toilet sounds pretty outrageous to me.

    Can't your friend simply go to the toilet, regardless of whether she is authorised to go? I can't imagine what the employer could do about it. Issuing a warning for going to the toilet would look ridiculous. If the employer dismissed her, they would face an unfair dismissal claim (health and safety cases are exempt from the requirement to have 2 years service to claim unfair dismissal).
    • xapprenticex
    • By xapprenticex 10th Sep 17, 10:48 PM
    • 1,194 Posts
    • 1,102 Thanks
    xapprenticex
    "what responsibility is the man taking?".
    Originally posted by sangie595
    Was waiting for you to say that.



    Come at me bro

    Nice for you. I'm not pregnant. But I have a disability which means I have to take drugs that impact on my bowels. What a shame everyone isn't like you. If you've never had to hold it in, when the need to go is desperate- no you can't f*** ing "hold it in," for a couple of hours!
    Originally posted by sangie595
    Try a She-Pee, if you're talking about a lil'nuke then i cant help you there.

    You're arguing over a poo troll guys!
    Originally posted by IAmWales
    lmao, you never know.
    Last edited by xapprenticex; 10-09-2017 at 10:55 PM.
    • sangie595
    • By sangie595 10th Sep 17, 11:11 PM
    • 3,723 Posts
    • 6,098 Thanks
    sangie595
    Was waiting for you to say that.
    .
    Originally posted by xapprenticex
    I. glad you think that possible discrimination and breaches of health and safety are amusing. If you genuinely can't find anything more constructive to do with your life than find is amusing that some of us have health conditions that affects our bodily functions, then you really have a sad existence.
    .
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