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  • FIRST POST
    • Knit Witch
    • By Knit Witch 18th Jul 17, 8:29 PM
    • 3,198Posts
    • 29,300Thanks
    Knit Witch
    The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!
    • #1
    • 18th Jul 17, 8:29 PM
    The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat! 18th Jul 17 at 8:29 PM
    As threads are going walkabout I thought I would start the next stage of this off - I will try and do the links later!
    V3ry - £555.59
Page 121
    • monnagran
    • By monnagran 6th Dec 17, 4:51 AM
    • 3,185 Posts
    • 40,067 Thanks
    monnagran
    MMF and VJsmum I woke up early today thinking about you both.

    Just had a long post disappear on me. Inspiration has now flown so I'll leave you with a thought and then get on with the business of feeding the 5,000.

    THOUGHT FOR TODAY

    I've just got home and found all the windows and doors open, and everything has gone.
    Now what kind of sick, twisted person does that to someone's Advent Calendar?
    Last edited by monnagran; 06-12-2017 at 5:42 AM.
    I believe that friends are quiet angels
    Who lift us to our feet when our wings
    Have trouble remembering how to fly.
    • Hard Up Hester
    • By Hard Up Hester 6th Dec 17, 6:46 AM
    • 3,246 Posts
    • 38,810 Thanks
    Hard Up Hester
    Sending love and hugs to MMF and VJ's.
    CHS and I have both lost both our parents so unload here all you want, we are all here to listen and support you both.
    Chin up, Titus out.
    • silvasava
    • By silvasava 6th Dec 17, 9:04 AM
    • 3,291 Posts
    • 52,444 Thanks
    silvasava
    Seconding HuH's post. Huge hugs to both of you and please continue to vent all you like on here. This is something many of us have gone through and many of us will have to face.
    Small victories - sometimes they are all you can hope for but sometimes they are all you need - be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle
    • VJsmum
    • By VJsmum 6th Dec 17, 9:17 AM
    • 4,898 Posts
    • 70,570 Thanks
    VJsmum
    Went to bed early and slept ok. Woke up with a determination to 'get on with it' - every day, in my head, when i sink into self pity, my mum tells me that i have to get on with it. More so today, 8 years to the day since she died I miss her every day but it still makes me smile that she's still telling me off .

    I don't plan to go down today - i live 150 miles away - so i am catching up with washing and trying to do the christmas shopping so that I can tick that off my list. Will have a nice lunch with DD whilst shopping - she's been a bit abandoned of late.

    One day / hour / minute at a time... I don't think this is The End, I do think it's the Beginning of The End

    Thinking of MMF

    So, I need to sort out the s0dding dishwasher now - the pump's gone. I would leave it, but it will start to smell.
    You're out with a friend in the capital, I'm a thousand leagues under the sea
    You're hovering worriedly over your eggs, And I'm pondering trees
    I'm wandering long, And I'm pondering trees
    For you and me
    Guy Garvey
    • mardatha
    • By mardatha 6th Dec 17, 10:50 AM
    • 14,157 Posts
    • 132,272 Thanks
    mardatha
    Sending love. light & strength to all who need it xxx
    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 6th Dec 17, 11:41 AM
    • 11,177 Posts
    • 154,019 Thanks
    MrsLurcherwalker
    And many, many hugs xxx
    Go forward with the vision even if no one else can see it!

    No amount of regretting can change the past, and no amount of worrying can change the future!
    • MMF007
    • By MMF007 6th Dec 17, 12:48 PM
    • 1,034 Posts
    • 23,244 Thanks
    MMF007
    Oh chaos! Mum has a chest infection and with her other long term illnesses there is no way I was chancing not taking her to docs. Also, the weather froecast is abysmal tomorrow and friday, so it was go now or wait til Monday!

    So we visited dad - he looks weaker but is till talking and I managed to feed him some porridge and mum gave me a small amount of weak tea. I told his nurse what we had to do and just asked if he was likely to be still with us in about 4 hrs time, when we could get back. She said she was pretty certain, yes. He still has a good colour and his feet are warm.
    We then had to dash 75 miles to get to mum's doc (no point getting her seen anywhere else, unless they are familiar with her medical hist she gets dismissed easily). We had to ring doc to say we were running 10 mins late, due to a temp bridge closure so an ambulance could get through single-line roadworks!.

    Doc gave mum necessary prescription, we raced to home to try and secure everything in readiness for gales, put the kettle on for a quick brew before doing the 75 miles back and ......the phone rang. Hospital to say they are moving dad to nearer home (cottage hospital type place, only 20 miles away). Thank goodness we had vacated the hotel and booked another one on a cancellable basis this morning. So we had our clothes etc with us and don't have go back to inverness again just now.
    Hospital say the transfer will take place this afto and we can, of course, visit once he's settled in.

    His best friend was already on the way to visit, so it's good that dad will see him (timings should work out, otherwise we could all be chasing up and down the road after each other!). Mobile phones are great but not if you driving!

    I have cancelled the hotel, had a brew and drawn breath.

    Our journeys were half the distance you have to do, VJsMum. Please drive safely and take a break when you need to xx
    I have changed my work-life balance to a life-work balance.
    • VJsmum
    • By VJsmum 6th Dec 17, 5:28 PM
    • 4,898 Posts
    • 70,570 Thanks
    VJsmum
    Thanks MMF - I generally don't drive, but go on the train. Take care - I am thinking of you.

    Dad has been told. medics said that they might take a sample of prostate to test but there were many other indicators and now I have had time to take it in i can see that things add up. he took the news fairly well apparently, just is anxious to go home. i wasn't there. yesterday he was so confused that I didn't think they would tell him today, so gambled and came home. I am the only one who lives away. It is a bit strange as he is actually my stepfather but he married my mum when i was 5 and treated me like his own, i think we both forget that he isn't my biological father, but it means that legally i have little influence.

    My sister and two younger brothers are his biological children and they were with him. Doctors have not put a timescale on it but said the prognosis was 'not good'. I'm no medic, but i think i could work that out for myself...

    So a strange and uncertain period starts here. My mum had COPD and, whilst she was diagnosed as terminal, it was a slightly different scenario as it progresses so slowly... December 6th is not a good day in our family, bizarrely it was also the day i was supposed to have arrived in the world - but i waited till the 18th, maybe I knew...
    You're out with a friend in the capital, I'm a thousand leagues under the sea
    You're hovering worriedly over your eggs, And I'm pondering trees
    I'm wandering long, And I'm pondering trees
    For you and me
    Guy Garvey
    • mardatha
    • By mardatha 6th Dec 17, 6:19 PM
    • 14,157 Posts
    • 132,272 Thanks
    mardatha
    MMF007 are you up north now? The forecast is dire, my pal in Skye says Caroline has already hit there. Hope you are not on the road too much tonight and tomorrow x
    • VJsmum
    • By VJsmum 6th Dec 17, 6:25 PM
    • 4,898 Posts
    • 70,570 Thanks
    VJsmum
    On the other hand i spoke to my line manager today and told him that, whilst i should be fine for marking, this had happened.

    He then told me his, i am guessing, 30 something year old daughter was diagnosed with leukemia last week, she was pregnant and has lost the baby that really is shocking...
    You're out with a friend in the capital, I'm a thousand leagues under the sea
    You're hovering worriedly over your eggs, And I'm pondering trees
    I'm wandering long, And I'm pondering trees
    For you and me
    Guy Garvey
    • Islandmaid
    • By Islandmaid 6th Dec 17, 6:33 PM
    • 2,418 Posts
    • 34,139 Thanks
    Islandmaid
    On the other hand i spoke to my line manager today and told him that, whilst i should be fine for marking, this had happened.

    He then told me his, i am guessing, 30 something year old daughter was diagnosed with leukemia last week, she was pregnant and has lost the baby that really is shocking...
    Originally posted by VJsmum
    How sad - life is so cruel sometimes
    Note to self - STOP SPENDING MONEY !!


    DECEMBER GC - not a bloomin clue - opting out of December as itís my 50th and i think once a half century itís okay not to mind - back in the saddle January
    • nannywindow
    • By nannywindow 6th Dec 17, 6:39 PM
    • 454 Posts
    • 5,570 Thanks
    nannywindow
    Hello all
    I know you are all lovely people here and a lot of you are going through tough times, but could you spare some healing thoughts to send to a friend of my DGC. He was diagnosed with Leukemia on Thursday and has already had his first chemo session. Bless him he's only 5 years old.
    Thanks
    nan
    • monnagran
    • By monnagran 6th Dec 17, 7:08 PM
    • 3,185 Posts
    • 40,067 Thanks
    monnagran
    Life is really messy sometimes. My heart goes out to MMF and VJsmum All the more difficult when the rest of the world appears to be celebrating.
    Listen you two, we can't do anything for you but you are supported by our love and concern. Just look after yourselves, eat properly and rest as much as you can. There is an awful poignancy about losing a parent, no matter how old you are, more so if it has been a good relationship. Just hoping that you both have lots of happy memories.

    nannywindow, That is pure tragedy. Cruel beyond imagining.Lots of prayers for the little lad and his family.
    Last edited by monnagran; 06-12-2017 at 7:11 PM.
    I believe that friends are quiet angels
    Who lift us to our feet when our wings
    Have trouble remembering how to fly.
    • candygirl
    • By candygirl 6th Dec 17, 7:12 PM
    • 26,088 Posts
    • 105,741 Thanks
    candygirl
    VJSMUM My Dad had terminal prostate cancer with bone secondaries, and the Prostate Cancer charity forum was a really good place to go for advice, to vent etc.Love to you all, and to MMF and family xxx
    "You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf"

    (Kabat-Zinn 2004)
    • VJsmum
    • By VJsmum 6th Dec 17, 7:39 PM
    • 4,898 Posts
    • 70,570 Thanks
    VJsmum
    VJSMUM My Dad had terminal prostate cancer with bone secondaries, and the Prostate Cancer charity forum was a really good place to go for advice, to vent etc.Love to you all, and to MMF and family xxx
    Originally posted by candygirl
    That is really useful, thank you
    You're out with a friend in the capital, I'm a thousand leagues under the sea
    You're hovering worriedly over your eggs, And I'm pondering trees
    I'm wandering long, And I'm pondering trees
    For you and me
    Guy Garvey
    • MMF007
    • By MMF007 6th Dec 17, 8:55 PM
    • 1,034 Posts
    • 23,244 Thanks
    MMF007
    Oh how terrible - the little boy and the lady in her 30's. My dad has had a great life and his time has come. We take comfort from that. So much worse seeing young folk and kids suffering.

    Yes, Mardatha, we are north of inverness. Dad has been moved to the cottage hosp and we have visited just now. We have battened down the hatches ready for tomorrows storm! We shall watch the weather closely and really hope to get to see Dad tomorrow but we simply cannot travel unless the storm allows.
    He is in a lovely room, there is a recliner chair for us and a lounge with pillows and blankets and a shower for us, if we need to stay. He was a lot calmer, although still wanting to go home - he started listing what he liked about being home but it was funny because he started to say he wanted his own chair, but corrected that and said 'well not my chair but my own bed, my own shower (etc). Obvs he is not that kean on his new chair!

    So, I am off to bed with a good book until I fall asleep. Nite all x

    Thinking of all you lovely people and your families xx
    I have changed my work-life balance to a life-work balance.
    • burtha
    • By burtha 6th Dec 17, 10:03 PM
    • 591 Posts
    • 6,249 Thanks
    burtha
    Just a quick hi , sending hugs out to anyone that needs one ....
    This thread is fantastic, simple as .......xx
    • camelot1001
    • By camelot1001 7th Dec 17, 6:32 AM
    • 3,586 Posts
    • 41,770 Thanks
    camelot1001
    So sorry to hear of all the sadness on here at the moment, my thoughts, love and prayers are with you all.
    • silvasava
    • By silvasava 7th Dec 17, 9:11 AM
    • 3,291 Posts
    • 52,444 Thanks
    silvasava
    So much sadness around - just know you are all in my thoughts and wishing you strength the face the day
    Small victories - sometimes they are all you can hope for but sometimes they are all you need - be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle
    • MMF007
    • By MMF007 7th Dec 17, 9:41 AM
    • 1,034 Posts
    • 23,244 Thanks
    MMF007
    It's a funny old world. The wind is howling around us and mum says it is not safe to go on the road (she's right really). I am worried that we should be going to see dad but I can see how much good this little break from hospital visiting is doing mum. She's been at it for 16 days ow, having seen the collapse, the cpr, etc and then having stayed in a hotel to be near the hospital. She's 78 and very ill herself. I have decided that she must be the person calling the shots now. If she wants to travel I'll take her, if not I'll help her here (at least we are at home now and that makes so much difference to what things we can usefully do!).

    Er, we've just had a horrendous gust and the BBC weather says it is generally 68 - 72 mph

    Hospital say dad has been watching football on his tv! They'll tell him we rang and that we are planning to visit asap.
    I have changed my work-life balance to a life-work balance.
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