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  • FIRST POST
    • birtley90
    • By birtley90 12th Jul 17, 1:25 PM
    • 10Posts
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    birtley90
    Teacher told child she could wet herself
    • #1
    • 12th Jul 17, 1:25 PM
    Teacher told child she could wet herself 12th Jul 17 at 1:25 PM
    My daughter year 6 asked the teacher if she could go to the toilet during the afternoon but was refused. She waited a bit and asked again but was told to wait until hometime. My daughter said she couldn't wait that long and the teacher replied with "If you can't wait you will just have to wet yourself"

    Fuming with the teacher!
Page 3
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Jul 17, 3:22 PM
    • 28,226 Posts
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    Mojisola
    Like I said if they have their period they can bring a note from home
    Originally posted by louiseturner
    Do you think periods always start at specific times?

    Have you never started during the day?
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Jul 17, 3:41 PM
    • 28,226 Posts
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    Mojisola
    And during that conversation, a responsible mother would explain to her daughter how to be prepared, how to be discreet and how to make sure that they don't have to skip out of class just s few minutes after having a break.
    Originally posted by jondav
    As a responsible adult, I've had to leave meetings suddenly to get to the loo quickly when a period started.

    Not every woman has regular, low-flow periods.
    • pollyanna24
    • By pollyanna24 12th Jul 17, 3:46 PM
    • 3,668 Posts
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    pollyanna24
    Don't be ridiculous.

    A young girl of this age who has started her period will have (or should have had) that conversation with her parents, at least her mother.

    And during that conversation, a responsible mother would explain to her daughter how to be prepared, how to be discreet and how to make sure that they don't have to skip out of class just s few minutes after having a break.

    They will have to learn to deal with periods sooner or later - why not start now??

    Mollycoddled, spoiled kids are the reason this country is in such a mess - they expect everything to just go their way and the worst thing is the parents back them up!!
    Originally posted by jondav
    Are you male? Once in school, in the summer, I wasn't allowed to go the toilet for the above reason. Wasn't much over 11. Summer dresses were stupidly white with grey stripes.

    Got into huge trouble for wearing my cardigan tied around my waist. Point blank refused to take it off. In the end, I got sent home after ringing my mother in tears as I didn't want to tell the teachers the reason why.

    I don't think this is about spoiled kids to be fair.
    Pink Sproglettes born 2008 and 2010
    House Worth (approx) - £400,000
    Mortgages (2nd July 2017) - £183,377.40
    Equity - £216,522.60
    • KateySW
    • By KateySW 12th Jul 17, 3:53 PM
    • 99 Posts
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    KateySW
    Don't be ridiculous.

    A young girl of this age who has started her period will have (or should have had) that conversation with her parents, at least her mother.

    And during that conversation, a responsible mother would explain to her daughter how to be prepared, how to be discreet and how to make sure that they don't have to skip out of class just s few minutes after having a break.

    They will have to learn to deal with periods sooner or later - why not start now??

    Mollycoddled, spoiled kids are the reason this country is in such a mess - they expect everything to just go their way and the worst thing is the parents back them up!!
    Originally posted by jondav
    Sigh...

    I'm going to skip over the weird comment about kids ruining the country because honestly the whole 'this generation is all that's wrong in society' thing is as old as flipping time and yawn (not to mention it's incredibly weird to make that comment in relation to girls learning how to deal with periods)...

    So I'm just going to throw a wild card out there and guess that you've never had to deal with periods yourself...? Because if you had you'd know that unfortunately, as much as you can be prepared and have "learnt how to deal with it", sometimes it isn't enough. Sometimes it catches you out and it can be at the most inconvenient of times. Even as an adult. It doesn't happen every single time of course, but alas the beginning of periods cannot be neatly scheduled into a lunch break.

    Needing to go for a wee and needing to deal with your period, really not the same thing. Going to the bathroom, yes, you can usually hold for at least some time. Periods, not so much. Biology, funny old thing ain't it?

    N.B. very aware the OP's daughter didn't have her period, but just found that comment a tad ridiculous.
    Last edited by KateySW; 12-07-2017 at 3:58 PM.
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 12th Jul 17, 3:56 PM
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    Pollycat
    Lots of talk about periods but the OP's daughter wasn't having her period when she asked to go to the toilet.
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Jul 17, 3:59 PM
    • 28,226 Posts
    • 71,814 Thanks
    Mojisola
    Lots of talk about periods but the OP's daughter wasn't having her period when she asked to go to the toilet.
    Originally posted by Pollycat
    But the teacher didn't know that.

    A blanket rule that no child leaves the classroom during lessons is going to be a problem.

    Having to declare to all why you want to go just isn't fair - and neither is going up to the teacher and whispering it because the other kids will still know why you're being allowed to go.
    • pollyanna24
    • By pollyanna24 12th Jul 17, 4:00 PM
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    pollyanna24
    Lots of talk about periods but the OP's daughter wasn't having her period when she asked to go to the toilet.
    Originally posted by Pollycat
    This is true (we assume).

    But the point is, is that she could have been. And unless she announced it to the teacher (and possibly the class), the teacher wouldn't have known.
    Pink Sproglettes born 2008 and 2010
    House Worth (approx) - £400,000
    Mortgages (2nd July 2017) - £183,377.40
    Equity - £216,522.60
    • BJV
    • By BJV 12th Jul 17, 4:02 PM
    • 2,241 Posts
    • 3,359 Thanks
    BJV
    Anyway, who hasn't !!!!ed themselves in public at some point? It's character building.
    Originally posted by fairy lights
    God thought it was just me! ha ha. I still have flash backs to the holiday in grease when after too many beers and having been constipated, so subsequently taking far too many laxatives , I well lets just say if wetting yourself is character building I should be the most interesting person ever!!!! ha ha

    Joking apart since when did having to go the the toilet for what ever reason become a cardinal sin???
    Last edited by BJV; 12-07-2017 at 4:04 PM.
    Happiness, Health and Wealth in that order please!
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 12th Jul 17, 4:17 PM
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    Pollycat
    But the teacher didn't know that.

    A blanket rule that no child leaves the classroom during lessons is going to be a problem.

    Having to declare to all why you want to go just isn't fair - and neither is going up to the teacher and whispering it because the other kids will still know why you're being allowed to go.
    Originally posted by Mojisola
    This is true (we assume).

    But the point is, is that she could have been. And unless she announced it to the teacher (and possibly the class), the teacher wouldn't have known.
    Originally posted by pollyanna24
    Yes, the teacher didn't know that.
    Yes, she wasn't on her period.

    So - imho only - discussion about what happens when someone is having their period and wants to go to the toilet is irrelevant to the OP's specific complaint..

    TBH, a lot of this discussion sounds like 'think of the children'.
    Could have.
    Might have.
    But didn't.
    • Malthusian
    • By Malthusian 12th Jul 17, 4:26 PM
    • 2,884 Posts
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    Malthusian
    Ahhh some real d!jà vu here. There's even the teacher who joined MSE today and is using a full name while she tells us about her policy on no toilet breaks...
    Originally posted by KateySW
    The child should have taken off one of her plimsolls and used that in extremis.
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Jul 17, 4:37 PM
    • 28,226 Posts
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    Mojisola
    So - imho only - discussion about what happens when someone is having their period and wants to go to the toilet is irrelevant to the OP's specific complaint.
    Originally posted by Pollycat
    Where's the rule that says we're only allowed to discuss an issue in terms that are relevant to the opening post?

    If a school has a blanket rule that no child is allowed out to the toilet during lesson times, a girl will eventually have an embarrassing incident.

    Just because it didn't happen with the OP's child isn't a reason not to discuss it.
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 12th Jul 17, 4:42 PM
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    Pollycat
    Where's the rule that says we're only allowed to discuss an issue in terms that are relevant to the opening post?

    If a school has a blanket rule that no child is allowed out to the toilet during lesson times, a girl will eventually have an embarrassing incident.

    Just because it didn't happen with the OP's child isn't a reason not to discuss it.
    Originally posted by Mojisola
    Yes, the teacher didn't know that.
    Yes, she wasn't on her period.

    So - imho only - discussion about what happens when someone is having their period and wants to go to the toilet is irrelevant to the OP's specific complaint..
    Originally posted by Pollycat
    ^^^^
    Did I say there was a rule that says we're only allowed to discuss an issue in terms that are relevant to the opening post?

    Where is the rule that says we're not allowed to express our own opinions?

    ^^^^ Hypothetical question. I know there isn't one.
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Jul 17, 4:44 PM
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    Mojisola
    Where is the rule that says we're not allowed to express our own opinions?
    Originally posted by Pollycat
    That's ironic! You were telling us that we should be restricting our replies.
    • FBaby
    • By FBaby 12th Jul 17, 4:51 PM
    • 15,812 Posts
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    FBaby
    It's easy. Child is known to mess about and her requests to go to the toilet was the 3rd one that week, after being allowed to go the times before but reminded to go at break. Child took ages to come back leaving teacher suspicious that this was not about needing the toilet: Teacher acted totally reasonable.

    Child is always well behaved, never asked to go to the toilet before, looked uncomfortable and shy about it. Totally unreasonable.
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 12th Jul 17, 4:55 PM
    • 17,638 Posts
    • 44,916 Thanks
    Pollycat
    That's ironic! You were telling us that we should be restricting our replies.
    Originally posted by Mojisola
    I was telling you nothing of the kind.

    It is my opinion that a discussion about what happens when someone is having their period and wants to go to the toilet is irrelevant to the OP's specific complaint.

    You don't have to agree.

    You - or anyone else - don't have to stop discussing how a pupil should deal with a need to use the toilet if she is on her period or how a teacher should deal with a request to use the toilet if the pupil is on her period.
    • Pollycat
    • By Pollycat 12th Jul 17, 4:58 PM
    • 17,638 Posts
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    Pollycat
    This is the point. The period was mentioned by the mother as a "what if" scenario, which makes the situation seem much worse than it actually is.
    Originally posted by jondav
    I agree with this ^^^^.

    Fact is there was no period involved and the girl should have gone to the loo when she had the chance just minutes earlier.
    Originally posted by jondav
    It was 40 minutes after lunch, quite reasonable in my eyes to need a wee after lunch. She had to wait 1hr and half
    Originally posted by birtley90
    • KateySW
    • By KateySW 12th Jul 17, 4:58 PM
    • 99 Posts
    • 148 Thanks
    KateySW
    Don't be ridiculous.

    A young girl of this age who has started her period will have (or should have had) that conversation with her parents, at least her mother.

    And during that conversation, a responsible mother would explain to her daughter how to be prepared, how to be discreet and how to make sure that they don't have to skip out of class just s few minutes after having a break.

    They will have to learn to deal with periods sooner or later - why not start now??

    Mollycoddled, spoiled kids are the reason this country is in such a mess - they expect everything to just go their way and the worst thing is the parents back them up!!
    Originally posted by jondav
    Just posting this here again jondav, seeing as you've just argued back that the whole point is that it wasn't about it being her period - bit odd when you wrote the comment above about dealing with periods, being discreet, having the conversation with mothers, not having to skip out of class etc etc...

    My comment wasn't out of context in response to that
    • Guest101
    • By Guest101 12th Jul 17, 5:05 PM
    • 15,143 Posts
    • 14,754 Thanks
    Guest101
    You think every time a girl is on their period, they should bring in a note from home excusing them to go to the toilet?

    Isn't this a little embarrassing for an 11 year old to have to hand to possibly a male teacher?
    Originally posted by pollyanna24
    Why would it be any more embarrassing? Are you suggesting a male teacher wouldn't understand the issue? Seems a bit sexist....
    • cjdavies
    • By cjdavies 12th Jul 17, 5:09 PM
    • 2,583 Posts
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    cjdavies
    Often I just have the sudden urge to go and need to go.

    There are some stupid !!!!ers who seem incapable of thinking.
    • Guest101
    • By Guest101 12th Jul 17, 5:14 PM
    • 15,143 Posts
    • 14,754 Thanks
    Guest101
    Tell you what, next time one of you is doing your job, invite the teacher along to tell you how to do it..... Until then, you let him/her run their classroom as they see fit and you get on with your job, whether that's parenting or professional or both.


    Using an extreme example to justify a position is a common flaw in liberal arguments. So how about this for a compromise.


    If it's ok to leave the classroom because you are on your period, but not to use the toilet, would that be ok? Then simply explain to the teacher that is the reason and they'll be aware that for next few days it may happen, the situation should only occur a handful of times a term!
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