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    • stringer_bell
    • By stringer_bell 19th Jun 17, 8:54 PM
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    stringer_bell
    Neighbour feeding my cat, advice?
    • #1
    • 19th Jun 17, 8:54 PM
    Neighbour feeding my cat, advice? 19th Jun 17 at 8:54 PM
    Got an 8 year old cat, he has had an operation because of urinary crystals in past so is on a special diet, we lace his diet with treats so he eats it

    about a year ago, my neighbour got a cat, and ever since she has started feeding my cat, so much that he doesnt come home for days and spends time in her house

    I have told her countless times to stop as hes on a diet, but the cat never seems to come home, which is weird, if its hungry it would come in, so i guess its meal needs are being met elsewhere.. no surprises for where

    so what options do I have? I have told her about 5 times now, and it just doesnt sink in

    I have treats for it so it eats his meds, if she is feeding it the good stuff, he has no need to eat its prescription food, and we never see it.. it even stays in her house..
Page 1
    • DCFC79
    • By DCFC79 19th Jun 17, 8:58 PM
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    DCFC79
    • #2
    • 19th Jun 17, 8:58 PM
    • #2
    • 19th Jun 17, 8:58 PM
    Try and be a bit firmer with her (the neighbour not the cat ), explain it is imperative she doesnt feed your cat although you are grateful for her doing so its not ideal as hes not getting his meds.
    Can people stop loaning money/being a guarator to family/friends, it rarely ends well and you lose out as your money is gone or you get shafted with being a guarantor.
    • Geoff1963
    • By Geoff1963 19th Jun 17, 9:03 PM
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    Geoff1963
    • #3
    • 19th Jun 17, 9:03 PM
    • #3
    • 19th Jun 17, 9:03 PM
    Tell the neighbour that you had to take your cat to the vet, again. Apparently someone has been . . . etc.
    Of course, with cat flu being so contagious, he really should be kept indoors, but he keeps running off.
    • Jojo the Tightfisted
    • By Jojo the Tightfisted 19th Jun 17, 9:10 PM
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    Jojo the Tightfisted
    • #4
    • 19th Jun 17, 9:10 PM
    • #4
    • 19th Jun 17, 9:10 PM
    Send her the next vet bill.
    I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die: I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by.

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    Originally posted by colinw
    • stringer_bell
    • By stringer_bell 19th Jun 17, 9:10 PM
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    stringer_bell
    • #5
    • 19th Jun 17, 9:10 PM
    • #5
    • 19th Jun 17, 9:10 PM
    Tell the neighbour that you had to take your cat to the vet, again. Apparently someone has been . . . etc.
    Of course, with cat flu being so contagious, he really should be kept indoors, but he keeps running off.
    Originally posted by Geoff1963
    I could keep my cat in I guess, but of course, it would be meowing its t*ts off at the door, I have told her last night it needs surgery again and she was like " ohh no " and yet today it hasnt come in, I guess that didn't sink in either. maybe she can share half the vet bills?
    • Malthusian
    • By Malthusian 20th Jun 17, 11:06 AM
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    Malthusian
    • #6
    • 20th Jun 17, 11:06 AM
    • #6
    • 20th Jun 17, 11:06 AM
    Occupational hazard if you have a cat and allow them to roam. Either keep him in and put up with the miaowing, or accept that cats make their own decisions.

    You could threaten to sue her for the vet bills if you don't mind making an enemy of your neighbour. It would be a hollow threat as the chance of winning in court would be almost nil. She would simply argue that she just puts food out for her cat and your cat steals it, and that it's your job to keep him shut in. No judge in the world would think it reasonable to to expect someone to constantly guard their cat's food bowl to make sure another person's cat isn't eating there. But the threat would probably stop her deliberately feeding him - if that's what she's doing.
    • Guest101
    • By Guest101 20th Jun 17, 11:09 AM
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    Guest101
    • #7
    • 20th Jun 17, 11:09 AM
    • #7
    • 20th Jun 17, 11:09 AM
    You cant tell her what to do in her garden.


    If it's that important, keep your cat in doors.
    • stringer_bell
    • By stringer_bell 20th Jun 17, 12:05 PM
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    stringer_bell
    • #8
    • 20th Jun 17, 12:05 PM
    • #8
    • 20th Jun 17, 12:05 PM
    Occupational hazard if you have a cat and allow them to roam. Either keep him in and put up with the miaowing, or accept that cats make their own decisions.

    You could threaten to sue her for the vet bills if you don't mind making an enemy of your neighbour. It would be a hollow threat as the chance of winning in court would be almost nil. She would simply argue that she just puts food out for her cat and your cat steals it, and that it's your job to keep him shut in. No judge in the world would think it reasonable to to expect someone to constantly guard their cat's food bowl to make sure another person's cat isn't eating there. But the threat would probably stop her deliberately feeding him - if that's what she's doing.
    Originally posted by Malthusian
    she knows the cat is ill, yet she keeps feeding it normal food.. feeding it so much it does not come home for its medication, because why would it? It's medication ( hills prescription cat food ) is probably awful.. so in a way, she is being cruel to my cat... because if the crystals develop again, it will need another surgery

    but we know she isn't leaving the cats bowl out, shes letting it in her house and feeding it, we asked her son " have you seen our cat today " to which he replied " yes, its in our house "
    • stringer_bell
    • By stringer_bell 20th Jun 17, 12:07 PM
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    stringer_bell
    • #9
    • 20th Jun 17, 12:07 PM
    • #9
    • 20th Jun 17, 12:07 PM
    You cant tell her what to do in her garden.


    If it's that important, keep your cat in doors.
    Originally posted by Guest101
    course not, but surely its reasonable to stop her feeding my cat? It can't have normal food all the time.. she is basically slowly poisoning it.

    I'm going to keep the cat indoors now, I have today, fed it early this morning and I've seen the neighbour walking past by my garden shouting " her " cat, never does that.. must be wondering where it is
    • Undervalued
    • By Undervalued 20th Jun 17, 1:03 PM
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    Undervalued
    course not, but surely its reasonable to stop her feeding my cat? It can't have normal food all the time.. she is basically slowly poisoning it.

    I'm going to keep the cat indoors now, I have today, fed it early this morning and I've seen the neighbour walking past by my garden shouting " her " cat, never does that.. must be wondering where it is
    Originally posted by stringer_bell
    How do you know it hasn't got a third (or even fourth) "home"?

    Maybe your neighbour has done as you have asked and your cat has found other soft touches?

    I used to be visited regularly by a large, friendly long haired cat. Despite the fact I never offered food or drink it would wander in and seek attention given half a chance. Eventually my neighbour's child told me that the cat actually lived next door to one of their school friends about 300 yards away!
    • Malthusian
    • By Malthusian 20th Jun 17, 3:46 PM
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    Malthusian
    she knows the cat is ill, yet she keeps feeding it normal food..
    Originally posted by stringer_bell
    You've not said anything that indicates that she is deliberately feeding it normal food just to annoy you, as opposed to feeding her cat normal food, which your cat then eats.

    Or as Undervalued said it could be wandering into a third home and they're the ones feeding it.

    Make your mind up as to whether you want to let your cat roam or not. If your cat is going to roam about then it runs the risk of eating something that is bad for it, just as it runs the risk of being mauled by a dog or hit by a car. If it's not safe for your cat to roam because anything it eats other than your special food will poison it, then you shouldn't be letting it roam.
    • stringer_bell
    • By stringer_bell 20th Jun 17, 4:27 PM
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    stringer_bell
    You've not said anything that indicates that she is deliberately feeding it normal food just to annoy you, as opposed to feeding her cat normal food, which your cat then eats.

    Or as Undervalued said it could be wandering into a third home and they're the ones feeding it.

    Make your mind up as to whether you want to let your cat roam or not. If your cat is going to roam about then it runs the risk of eating something that is bad for it, just as it runs the risk of being mauled by a dog or hit by a car. If it's not safe for your cat to roam because anything it eats other than your special food will poison it, then you shouldn't be letting it roam.
    Originally posted by Malthusian
    That is just not happening. My cat wandering into her home everyday and stealing her cats food? Come off it, she is feeding it because she can't help herself. Why is she letting my cat eat her cats food? We already know she lets it sleep in her house

    as for keeping it in, I live next to a huge field, it almost feels cruel keeping it in, but I get what you are saying, I have kept it in today. She has already made a few passes by my garden

    I have had my cat for 8 years, and now suddenly since she started feeding it, which she has admitted to btw, it wont come home and turns its nose up as medication. I don't believe in coincidences

    I'm guessing I will have to keep it in, I was hoping for someone who went through similar situation
    • stringer_bell
    • By stringer_bell 20th Jun 17, 4:29 PM
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    stringer_bell
    How do you know it hasn't got a third (or even fourth) "home"?

    Maybe your neighbour has done as you have asked and your cat has found other soft touches?

    I used to be visited regularly by a large, friendly long haired cat. Despite the fact I never offered food or drink it would wander in and seek attention given half a chance. Eventually my neighbour's child told me that the cat actually lived next door to one of their school friends about 300 yards away!
    Originally posted by Undervalued
    I don't know it hasn't got a third home, its highly unlikely though due to the timing
    • katiefinger
    • By katiefinger 21st Jun 17, 3:15 PM
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    katiefinger
    I had a VERY similar situation, although my cat wasn't on medication.

    I became so fed up with a neighbour letting my cat in, feeding her, allowing her to sleep there and finally telling me she was going to the RSPCA because I let my cat out and had the cheek to knock on her door asking for my cat back, that I just made my cat stay in for seven weeks. The first two to three weeks were incredibly painful and I felt really bad whenever my cat mewed or whined at the door or window. She seemed so sad, made worse by the fact my other cat was allowed in and out all the time.

    Anyway, after seven weeks I started letting her out again. I think it was a couple of days later that the Crazy Cat Neighbour knocked on my door, with my cat struggling in her arms.

    I just said, 'thanks' and took the cat off her. That was the last time I spoke to her and my cat has never 'disappeared' for more than a few hours at a time again. That was about four years ago. Crazy Cat Neighbour is still there and we know she's still enticing cats, but not ours!

    It is difficult to keep them in, but if it's for your peace of mind then it's worth it, although I may have been excessive with keeping mine in for seven weeks.
    Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt. So it goes.
    • GlasweJen
    • By GlasweJen 21st Jun 17, 10:38 PM
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    GlasweJen
    My MiL's neighbour is a crazy cat woman too. Her cat isn't allowed out so she basically catnaps other people's cats to keep in her house to keep her own cat company. She also feeds the best stuff like bits of fish and premium brand food to entice the cats back.

    You can't fix crazy, you're best keeping your cat in. Do you have a garden that you can make inescapable?
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    • Shoshannah
    • By Shoshannah 21st Jun 17, 10:48 PM
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    Shoshannah
    If the neighbour is not listening for one reason or another, you'll have to cat proof your garden. If you Google it, there are lots of companies that do this. If you're DIY-minded you can buy the bits to install yourself.

    A lot of people immediately dismiss this option because it's a faff and an expense, but it probably works out less than repeated cystotomies or blocked bladder treatment.
    • his missus
    • By his missus 22nd Jun 17, 3:23 PM
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    his missus
    I have to say that a neighbour's kitten often wanders into my house to interact with my three cats, have a nosey around, enjoy a bit of a fuss and a snooze (I think she likes a bit of peace from my neighbour's boisterous boys).


    As I know the kitten has a home, I would never feed her or shut her in. She does occasionally gets to my cat food before I have chance to pick it up and hide it but I would never purposely feed her.


    I'm sorry to hear your neighbour isn't prepared to not feed your cat. It does seem unfair to keep your cat in but maybe that will break the cycle.

    • eamon
    • By eamon 22nd Jun 17, 6:45 PM
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    eamon
    Next doors cat is currently asleep on my bed. I don't feed him.
    • mademoiselle
    • By mademoiselle 22nd Jun 17, 7:05 PM
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    mademoiselle
    If it is so imperative to the health of your cat that it only eats the food you give it, IMO the only way you can enforce that regime is to make your cat a house cat, and confine it.

    Cats can, and do, make their own decisions about what they will eat - and whose home they want to live at! Or indeed, whether they want to call your place 'home' at all.

    Why are you ignoring the very good advice already given to you on this thread?

    You appear unprepared to make the commitment to keep your cat confined ("it would be meowing its ***s off at the door" sounds neither a responsible, nor constructive, comment)

    Instead, it is far easier, it appears, to blame a neighbour who may, or may not, be feeding your cat - you say she has admitted it, but you don't know how your cat has been behaving, in order to get food elsewhere. It may well have been behaving as if it is starving, or stealing the food of the other cat until the neighbour has taken pity on it, or given it something in order that her own cat can feed in peace. In short, if your cat wanders (as many people on here have pointed out), you really have no idea how much of a problem it is being!

    I really don't see this situation as the neighbour's fault. Your cat, your responsibility. If your cat's food intake needs to be specific, and monitored - step up to the plate and do it! And stop blaming others.
    • hazyjo
    • By hazyjo 27th Jun 17, 2:05 PM
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    hazyjo
    Put a collar with a medical tag on it saying not to feed it in case it is going elsewhere.


    Alternatively, give the food you use to your neighbour. If your cat has chosen another home (as well as yours), there's little you can do other than accept it/keep them inside or contained in the garden. Might as well provide the food.


    We have several cats who sneak into our home. One literally thinks he has another home - not just at ours, we call him Baz, next door but one found him asleep on their son's bed, next to them the lady calls him Bacon, the couple over the road call him Blue. He has loads of homes - including his own - I tracked his owner down eventually who was more embarrassed than anything as she thought he was just off wandering all day. Sometimes he's on a bed at ours for hours!


    Doesn't help at ours that our cat loves other cats and prob sends out invites to all the local cats to come eat his dinner. He wails after Baz when he leaves and follows him everywhere. He's obsessed with cats. He's really not normal lol.
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