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  • FIRST POST
    • kellbanks
    • By kellbanks 16th Jun 17, 10:39 AM
    • 7Posts
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    kellbanks
    Teaching assistant wouldn't let daughter go to the toilet
    • #1
    • 16th Jun 17, 10:39 AM
    Teaching assistant wouldn't let daughter go to the toilet 16th Jun 17 at 10:39 AM
    Hi, just after a bit of advice.

    My daughter 6 year 2, says that the TA took the class yesterday and that 5 minutes after lunch she needed a wee. She said she asked and was told no and that she should have gone at lunch. The TA made her wait all afternoon despite asking 3 more times and explaining that holding her wee was giving her stomach ache. My little girl said she was bouncing up and down and had to keep her legs crossed. They don't have an afternoon break so she had to hold on for 2 hours.

    Should I speak to her regular teacher
    Last edited by kellbanks; 16-06-2017 at 11:56 AM.
Page 11
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 5:43 PM
    • 74 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Vickytaylor
    When I was about 9 I had a teacher who was notorious and never let children go to the toilet no matter how desperate even though it was in the classroom. I cannot believe it is still happening, Vicky if that had been my little girl who you had made wait all afternoon I would be instructing her to urinate in your classroom next time. Disgusting from a yr 2 teacher
    Originally posted by Judymumto3
    That would just embarrass a child, much easier to side with the teacher and encourage the child to go at break.
    • Jojo the Tightfisted
    • By Jojo the Tightfisted 19th Jun 17, 6:02 PM
    • 22,339 Posts
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    Jojo the Tightfisted
    I retrieved some teenagers from a dark corner of the site today. All had convinced their teachers that they were absolutely desperate to go to the toilet, met up and thought they'd have some fun rather than an end of year examination.

    Before going back to their classes (and each receiving a detention) they all claimed that they still needed to go to the toilet, claiming their Human Rights were being abused and threatening to p*ss all over the class if they weren't allowed to go.

    I wonder where they learned this behaviour?
    I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die: I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by.

    Yup you are officially Rock n Roll
    Originally posted by colinw
    • ossie
    • By ossie 19th Jun 17, 6:06 PM
    • 302 Posts
    • 291 Thanks
    ossie
    We only allow them to the toilet one at a time from exams so they do not confer.
    • LilElvis
    • By LilElvis 19th Jun 17, 6:18 PM
    • 2,998 Posts
    • 8,255 Thanks
    LilElvis
    In your opinion, I don't let my year 2 class go and they manage fine, they either go during break or hold on in lesson time
    Originally posted by Vickytaylor
    Fortunately my daughter's year 2 teacher is far more humane than you are. It doesn't sound as though you even like the children let alone have any empathy with them so I'm surprised you chose teaching as a career.
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 6:26 PM
    • 74 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Vickytaylor
    Fortunately my daughter's year 2 teacher is far more humane than you are. It doesn't sound as though you even like the children let alone have any empathy with them so I'm surprised you chose teaching as a career.
    Originally posted by LilElvis
    I love my job, I just don't see why they should go to the toilet in lesson times when that is what breaks are for, never had an accident when I have refused a child.
    • tooldle
    • By tooldle 19th Jun 17, 6:41 PM
    • 268 Posts
    • 425 Thanks
    tooldle
    I remember things being the same when i was at primary school, in the 70's. Toilets at break time only. Back in tjos days the toilet blocks were in the playground. They were generally cold and uninviting. Going in class time was unheard of. Nobody wanted to go outside to those toilets on their own.
    • LilElvis
    • By LilElvis 19th Jun 17, 6:48 PM
    • 2,998 Posts
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    LilElvis
    I remember things being the same when i was at primary school, in the 70's. Toilets at break time only. Back in tjos days the toilet blocks were in the playground. They were generally cold and uninviting. Going in class time was unheard of. Nobody wanted to go outside to those toilets on their own.
    Originally posted by tooldle
    I went to primary school in the 70s and we were allowed to go to the toilet during class time as long as we put our hands up and asked.
    • LilElvis
    • By LilElvis 19th Jun 17, 6:53 PM
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    LilElvis
    I love my job, I just don't see why they should go to the toilet in lesson times when that is what breaks are for, never had an accident when I have refused a child.
    Originally posted by Vickytaylor
    And is your stance regarding toilet breaks replicated across the school you work in, from Foundation to Year 6?
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 6:59 PM
    • 74 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Vickytaylor
    That still is the way it is still done, a child raises ther hand and asks to go,some teachers say yes and some say no.I just happen to say no
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 7:04 PM
    • 74 Posts
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    Vickytaylor
    At my school it is down to teachers discretion. Foundation have toilets in the rooms and are always allowed to go but yr 1 onwards it is down to the teachers, some say yes and some say no
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 7:12 PM
    • 74 Posts
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    Vickytaylor
    It is very rare for a KS2 child to be allowed to go. I'm the only KS1 teacher in the school who has the no toilet rule, but like I say no child has wet themselves and they are ok with holding it
    • LilElvis
    • By LilElvis 19th Jun 17, 7:33 PM
    • 2,998 Posts
    • 8,255 Thanks
    LilElvis
    It is very rare for a KS2 child to be allowed to go. I'm the only KS1 teacher in the school who has the no toilet rule, but like I say no child has wet themselves and they are ok with holding it
    Originally posted by Vickytaylor
    Perhaps your KS1 colleagues have the right approach then. Disregarding Foundation that means that at least 3 other teachers don't hold your views.
    • happyandcontented
    • By happyandcontented 19th Jun 17, 7:53 PM
    • 669 Posts
    • 1,393 Thanks
    happyandcontented
    That still is the way it is still done, a child raises ther hand and asks to go,some teachers say yes and some say no.I just happen to say no
    Originally posted by Vickytaylor
    I don't think that you can have a blanket rule, and I suspect the Governing Body would not back such a stance either.

    In the Op's position if you were my child's teacher I would definitely make a complaint given what you have written here.
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 7:57 PM
    • 74 Posts
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    Vickytaylor
    It is just a matter opinion, my colleagues do what they think is right and I have my approach. I have not allowed a single toilet break during lesson time this year and no accidents, If children were laving puddles in my room regularly then that would be different.
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 8:00 PM
    • 74 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Vickytaylor
    I don't think that you can have a blanket rule, and I suspect the Governing Body would not back such a stance either.

    In the Op's position if you were my child's teacher I would definitely make a complaint given what you have written here.
    Originally posted by happyandcontented
    Never had a complaint, they go only at breaks or hold it in during lessons, if they have a medical complaint they bring a doctor's note
    • parking_question_chap
    • By parking_question_chap 19th Jun 17, 8:03 PM
    • 1,241 Posts
    • 994 Thanks
    parking_question_chap
    When I was about 9 I had a teacher who was notorious and never let children go to the toilet no matter how desperate even though it was in the classroom. I cannot believe it is still happening, Vicky if that had been my little girl who you had made wait all afternoon I would be instructing her to urinate in your classroom next time. Disgusting from a yr 2 teacher
    Originally posted by Judymumto3
    Parents like you are why so any children have no discipline.

    Probably dont do any extra curricular learning with your three kids and moan that they are not progressing.
    • happyandcontented
    • By happyandcontented 19th Jun 17, 8:03 PM
    • 669 Posts
    • 1,393 Thanks
    happyandcontented
    It is just a matter opinion, my colleagues do what they think is right and I have my approach. I have not allowed a single toilet break during lesson time this year and no accidents, If children were laving puddles in my room regularly then that would be different.
    Originally posted by Vickytaylor
    It isn't a matter of opinion, it is about what is reasonable, the reasons behind your stance and the seemingly perverse enjoyment you get from enforcing your rules.

    Most schools have a policy on this kind of issue which expects staff to err on the side of reasonableness, if they can't do that and you seemingly cannot manage that, then they need to be apprised of what the GB consider reasonable and kind. I speak as Chair of Governors at a local school. I would be aghast if one of our staff behaved in the manner you do, and would take steps to sort it out.
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 8:14 PM
    • 74 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Vickytaylor
    It isn't a matter of opinion, it is about what is reasonable, the reasons behind your stance and the seemingly perverse enjoyment you get from enforcing your rules.

    Most schools have a policy on this kind of issue which expects staff to err on the side of reasonableness, if they can't do that and you seemingly cannot manage that, then they need to be apprised of what the GB consider reasonable and kind. I speak as Chair of Governors at a local school. I would be aghast if one of our staff behaved in the manner you do, and would take steps to sort it out.
    Originally posted by happyandcontented
    That is the point though I have never had any complaints of unreasonableness, I made 5 children wait this afternoon during P.E, they should have gone before the lesson, but they did not wee themselves or suffer.
    • Fireflyaway
    • By Fireflyaway 19th Jun 17, 8:14 PM
    • 972 Posts
    • 953 Thanks
    Fireflyaway
    Kids at that age will sometimes say theory need the toilet just to avoid a lesson / wonder about etc. Its very probable that if one child asks, many others will soon be asking. With 30 kids its not practical for them to go whenever they please. When I was at school ( primary and secondary) it was made very clear that you only use the toilet at break. I guess if I was the assistant I would allow a child to go once and then reiterate that in future they need to wait. Unless there is a health issue a 6 year old should be able to wait. They normally have 2 breaks and a lunch so probably no more than around an hour and a half in between. If this happened to me I would let it slide. Kids need to learn to deal with issues / hardship / unfairness at times. There was no harm done andi know I'd struggle to look after 30 kids at one time, all with different agendas!
    • Vickytaylor
    • By Vickytaylor 19th Jun 17, 8:16 PM
    • 74 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    Vickytaylor
    Parents like you are why so any children have no discipline.

    Probably dont do any extra curricular learning with your three kids and moan that they are not progressing.
    Originally posted by parking_question_chap
    Could not agree more, the girl she is referring to had 2 chances to use the toilet, why should I have let her go for a wee on my time.
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