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    • triplea35
    • By triplea35 11th Jun 17, 7:59 PM
    • 179Posts
    • 47Thanks
    triplea35
    Parental ' house gift'
    • #1
    • 11th Jun 17, 7:59 PM
    Parental ' house gift' 11th Jun 17 at 7:59 PM
    My son, in his mid 20's, and his girlfriend are talking about setting up a home together. They are both on relatively low wages so I can't see how they could afford a mortgage and all the other ongoing expense of running a home.

    Fortunately I am in a position to buy a house for my son.

    I am just concerned that if they split up his girlfriend might be entitled to half of the house.

    Can anyone offer any advice on best way to go about this.
    Can I put it in some form of trust? Should I just buy the house in my name? Should I just let them get a mortgage and help with the payments?
Page 1
    • BrassicWoman
    • By BrassicWoman 11th Jun 17, 9:24 PM
    • 1,361 Posts
    • 5,726 Thanks
    BrassicWoman
    • #2
    • 11th Jun 17, 9:24 PM
    • #2
    • 11th Jun 17, 9:24 PM
    If it is a gift, your son gets to decide what he does with it

    If there are strings, it is not a gift

    Why not save the money for now and let them try renting together ? If it looks like it's forever, decide then.
    Downsized and mortgage free
    Nov17 grocery challenge £133.10/£150
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 11th Jun 17, 9:28 PM
    • 28,515 Posts
    • 72,650 Thanks
    Mojisola
    • #3
    • 11th Jun 17, 9:28 PM
    • #3
    • 11th Jun 17, 9:28 PM
    My son, in his mid 20's, and his girlfriend are talking about setting up a home together.

    Fortunately I am in a position to buy a house for my son.

    I am just concerned that if they split up his girlfriend might be entitled to half of the house.
    Originally posted by triplea35
    If you buy the house and it is put in your son's name, then he will own the house.

    Unless they marry, she will have no claim on the property unless she puts money into repairing and improving it.

    I agree with BrassicWoman - they should try renting somewhere first to see if they can get on when they are living together.
    • Ithaca
    • By Ithaca 11th Jun 17, 11:56 PM
    • 220 Posts
    • 233 Thanks
    Ithaca
    • #4
    • 11th Jun 17, 11:56 PM
    • #4
    • 11th Jun 17, 11:56 PM
    My brother and his girlfriend signed a "declaration of trust" when my parents gifted him a deposit on their first house. Basically acknowledged that if they split up my parents would get the value of their deposit back first before my brother and his girlfriend split any remaining equity.

    A solicitor should be able to advise if something similar is suitable if you bought the entire house for your son and his girlfriend.

    I think the situation changes after marriage so take advice on what would happen if your son gets married while they are in the house.
    • Mojisola
    • By Mojisola 12th Jun 17, 8:56 AM
    • 28,515 Posts
    • 72,650 Thanks
    Mojisola
    • #5
    • 12th Jun 17, 8:56 AM
    • #5
    • 12th Jun 17, 8:56 AM
    If it is a gift, your son gets to decide what he does with it
    Originally posted by BrassicWoman
    As BW says, once the house is your son's, he can do what he wants with it - sell it and head off to live on a beach in the sunshine?

    If you want some kind of control, you could lend him the money and put a charge on the house which would have to be repaid when the house is sold. That protects your money from the GF even if she became his wife.

    You can decide whether you eventually give him (them?) the money depending on how life goes.
    • cjdavies
    • By cjdavies 12th Jun 17, 1:44 PM
    • 2,786 Posts
    • 2,791 Thanks
    cjdavies
    • #6
    • 12th Jun 17, 1:44 PM
    • #6
    • 12th Jun 17, 1:44 PM
    As they want to get a house together and you are adding strings like her getting half, it's best to stay out of it and and leave them do it themselves.
    • HoneyOnThePavement
    • By HoneyOnThePavement 12th Jun 17, 10:06 PM
    • 26 Posts
    • 6 Thanks
    HoneyOnThePavement
    • #7
    • 12th Jun 17, 10:06 PM
    • #7
    • 12th Jun 17, 10:06 PM
    Is she a wife or a girlfriend? How can a girlfriend claim for your son's property?
    • trailingspouse
    • By trailingspouse 12th Jun 17, 10:52 PM
    • 2,368 Posts
    • 3,373 Thanks
    trailingspouse
    • #8
    • 12th Jun 17, 10:52 PM
    • #8
    • 12th Jun 17, 10:52 PM
    All of us struggled to afford our first home. Working together to achieve something independently of your parents is part of making a life with someone and entering the grown-up world.

    Let them do it on their own. If they come to you desperate for help with a deposit or some such, then you can (carefully) get involved. But until then, leave them be.
    • cjdavies
    • By cjdavies 12th Jun 17, 11:38 PM
    • 2,786 Posts
    • 2,791 Thanks
    cjdavies
    • #9
    • 12th Jun 17, 11:38 PM
    • #9
    • 12th Jun 17, 11:38 PM
    My son, in his mid 20's, and his girlfriend are talking about setting up a home together.
    Originally posted by triplea35
    How can a girlfriend claim for your son's property?
    Originally posted by HoneyOnThePavement
    This is the problem.
    • agarnett
    • By agarnett 12th Jun 17, 11:59 PM
    • 1,282 Posts
    • 536 Thanks
    agarnett
    All of us struggled to afford our first home. Working together to achieve something independently of your parents is part of making a life with someone and entering the grown-up world.

    Let them do it on their own. If they come to you desperate for help with a deposit or some such, then you can (carefully) get involved. But until then, leave them be.
    Originally posted by trailingspouse
    I am amazed at the ignorance of some people who have no bloody idea how easy it was a generation or two ago to fall on your face in the muck of life in the UK and somehow always come up smelling of roses!

    Just take a look at the change in average first time buyer age over the past three decades, especially in London.

    Young people are paid far too little now for far too long at the start of their careers. They do not have sufficient disposable income to save substantial deposits (and nor did earlier generations but we got high LTV mortgages liberally spread upon us anyway). The average house prices in 2017 are astounding, and so are rents incurred by youngsters whilst trying to save a deposit.

    We weren't cleverer or smarter. We simply took too much out of the system, pulled up the drawbridge and are rather ignorantly waving from the battlements and shouting about how to build ladders rather than providing them.

    The only way the economy can be rebalanced in practice at the moment to ensure young people get on the housing ladder is for families to operate as families and give the poor youngsters a leg up (and quite obviously 'family' doesn't include the first boyfriend or girlfriend or two who come along and want to shack up).

    So I understand the OP's question perfectly. It is very sensible.

    It's bad enough our young people being saddled with student debt, let alone having the added risk of a shacking-up relationship suddenly becoming as financially burdensome as a celebrity divorce.

    The OP is correct to use the word gift. When you give someone a gift, you do not expect them to immediately give it to someone else. In fact in most cultures, including ours, it's rude to do that. It's even ruder for an outsider to say I'm leaving but I'm taking half of it, but rudeness seems the norm these days when it comes to easy money.

    I have kids also in their 20s whom I'd like to help in a similar way to the OP if they need it in a year or two.

    I'd be interested in learning as much as possible about how to help without the family entering into stupid risks arising from typical shackings up in 2017.
    Last edited by agarnett; 13-06-2017 at 12:04 AM.
    • Poppyhead
    • By Poppyhead 25th Jun 17, 2:17 PM
    • 14 Posts
    • 3 Thanks
    Poppyhead
    Argarnet, I totally agree with you. I've recently posted a similar question regarding best way to purchase a property for a child and am just currently scrolling through previous posts for any info I might have missed. A life spent scraping by on the breadline is plain miserable, I've been there and can't say it was particularly life enhancing or made me a better person. Why would I stand back and watch my children live through the same if I am in a position to prevent it? Anyway the advice I've been given from very helpful posters is to arrange a private mortgage. This way you lend the child the money to purchase the property but a solicitor documents the loan and you retain a charge on the property so that the outstanding loan is repaid to you when the property is sold. I think this is the route I will take though my husband is still in favour of buying as a second property and taking all the tax hits.
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