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  • FIRST POST
    • palgrave
    • By palgrave 19th Apr 17, 8:03 AM
    • 88Posts
    • 12Thanks
    palgrave
    Young, dumb and in debt
    • #1
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:03 AM
    Young, dumb and in debt 19th Apr 17 at 8:03 AM
    I can't begin to tell you the number of young couples I've come across, not on the property ladder but renting, relatively low incomes yet have a PCP/car finance for some fancy new wheels.
    My niece who is 21 years old rents with her partner (22 y.o) and has a brand new Audi A3 on finance. She works in retail with an annual salary of £14k while her partner works as a hotel receptionist with an annual salary of £17k. They rent a studio flat that probably takes up more than half of their monthly combined salary. What really annoys me is that they both have the option of moving in with their parents who live close by and are more than ademrnt on them doing so, in order for them to save for a flat deposit but they refuse. They both want to be"independent" yet live on credit cards buying fancy new clothes, Virgin active gym membership and and now the flash new car. I told my niece to save for a flat deposit rather than splashing out for a new Audi and putting them both under debt but she just didn't listen. I realise I'm ranting but what can I really do now???
Page 1
    • GothicStirling
    • By GothicStirling 19th Apr 17, 8:11 AM
    • 912 Posts
    • 678 Thanks
    GothicStirling
    • #2
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:11 AM
    • #2
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:11 AM
    What's your point?

    What other people do with their money, is their problem, not yours. Stop interfering.
    • palgrave
    • By palgrave 19th Apr 17, 8:37 AM
    • 88 Posts
    • 12 Thanks
    palgrave
    • #3
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:37 AM
    • #3
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:37 AM
    I should mention I loaned my niece £15k for her wedding but seems like I won't see that money again.
    • motorguy
    • By motorguy 19th Apr 17, 8:43 AM
    • 14,995 Posts
    • 8,432 Thanks
    motorguy
    • #4
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:43 AM
    • #4
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:43 AM
    I can't begin to tell you the number of young couples I've come across, not on the property ladder but renting, relatively low incomes yet have a PCP/car finance for some fancy new wheels.
    My niece who is 21 years old rents with her partner (22 y.o) and has a brand new Audi A3 on finance. She works in retail with an annual salary of £14k while her partner works as a hotel receptionist with an annual salary of £17k. They rent a studio flat that probably takes up more than half of their monthly combined salary. What really annoys me is that they both have the option of moving in with their parents who live close by and are more than ademrnt on them doing so, in order for them to save for a flat deposit but they refuse. They both want to be"independent" yet live on credit cards buying fancy new clothes, Virgin active gym membership and and now the flash new car. I told my niece to save for a flat deposit rather than splashing out for a new Audi and putting them both under debt but she just didn't listen. I realise I'm ranting but what can I really do now???
    Originally posted by palgrave
    Nothing you can do, and nothing to do with you, frankly.

    They have to "learn" for themselves.

    Also, do you really expect them to move in with their parents??? I would imagine they would rather !!!! on their hands and clap.

    And why would she want to save for a flat deposit? She probably at her age doesnt know even what she wants to do OR where she wants to live, and with Brexit coming up, is buying now the wisest thing to do?

    In fact there would be a school of thought that says buying ISNT the wisest thing to do - some of us (i am sure yourself included) remember the last property bubble bursting and the impact of that to home owners, and theres a growing belief that another burst is on its way.
    You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.
    • motorguy
    • By motorguy 19th Apr 17, 8:43 AM
    • 14,995 Posts
    • 8,432 Thanks
    motorguy
    • #5
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:43 AM
    • #5
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:43 AM
    I should mention I loaned my niece £15k for her wedding but seems like I won't see that money again.
    Originally posted by palgrave
    How dumb was that?

    Never lend friends or family money.

    And by lending her a ridiculous amount of money for a "dream wedding" surely you were facilitating and encouraging her credit lifestyle? Surely encouraging her to have a wedding within her means would have been the sensible thing if you're really concerned about her credit lifestyle?
    Last edited by motorguy; 19-04-2017 at 8:47 AM.
    You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.
    • Car 54
    • By Car 54 19th Apr 17, 8:48 AM
    • 1,951 Posts
    • 1,235 Thanks
    Car 54
    • #6
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:48 AM
    • #6
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:48 AM
    I should mention I loaned my niece £15k for her wedding but seems like I won't see that money again.
    Originally posted by palgrave
    So maybe age and dumbness aren't connected.
    • worried jim
    • By worried jim 19th Apr 17, 8:50 AM
    • 8,202 Posts
    • 12,431 Thanks
    worried jim
    • #7
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:50 AM
    • #7
    • 19th Apr 17, 8:50 AM
    My niece who is 21 years old rents with her partner (22 y.o) and has a brand new Audi A3 on finance.
    Originally posted by palgrave
    Surely that should be husband? Or has she spunked your £15k and moved on already?
    "Only two things are infinite-the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe"
    Albert Einstein
    • neilmcl
    • By neilmcl 19th Apr 17, 9:13 AM
    • 9,574 Posts
    • 6,579 Thanks
    neilmcl
    • #8
    • 19th Apr 17, 9:13 AM
    • #8
    • 19th Apr 17, 9:13 AM
    Is this really the right place for this thread?
    • DoaM
    • By DoaM 19th Apr 17, 9:18 AM
    • 2,489 Posts
    • 2,502 Thanks
    DoaM
    • #9
    • 19th Apr 17, 9:18 AM
    • #9
    • 19th Apr 17, 9:18 AM
    Is this real?
    Originally posted by neilmcl
    I've edited your post to reflect what you probably meant to ask.
    Diary of a madman
    Walk the line again today
    Entries of confusion
    Dear diary, I'm here to stay
    • Aylesbury Duck
    • By Aylesbury Duck 19th Apr 17, 9:40 AM
    • 696 Posts
    • 730 Thanks
    Aylesbury Duck
    OP, you really shouldn't beat yourself up about it. You can't help being young but you should stop lending significant sums of money to people to avoid being in debt.
    • davidwood123
    • By davidwood123 19th Apr 17, 10:56 AM
    • 355 Posts
    • 825 Thanks
    davidwood123
    Their decision.

    What is even more stupid is parents buying new drivers brand new cars. In fact, parents funding their adult children in general.

    They aren't doing them any favours.

    Teach them a valuable life lesson....if they want something, work for it.
    • wba31
    • By wba31 19th Apr 17, 10:56 AM
    • 2,149 Posts
    • 1,141 Thanks
    wba31
    I should mention I loaned my niece £15k for her wedding but seems like I won't see that money again.
    Originally posted by palgrave

    Could sue her through the small claims court for your money..?


    At 22 I was living with my rents, earning £20k a year and blew it on cars, TVs, stereos, gadgets and nonsense. Got married at 26 and we have rented up to this day and we still don't have savings to buy a house. Do I regret it? yes! was I told to save by my debt advisor mother? yes! however, I was young and "independent" enough to make my own decisions, and I have learnt lessons because of it, and am now more sensible with my money, and am slowly beginning to save (having a new job with more pay is helping that!)
    Only things I did differently were bought second hand cars outright, and did not get into high amounts of debt with family members.


    Nothing you can do about her attitude, but there is something you can do about the debt you're owed... it's called tough love...
    • kmb500
    • By kmb500 19th Apr 17, 1:03 PM
    • 294 Posts
    • 64 Thanks
    kmb500
    I can't begin to tell you the number of young couples I've come across, not on the property ladder but renting, relatively low incomes yet have a PCP/car finance for some fancy new wheels.
    My niece who is 21 years old rents with her partner (22 y.o) and has a brand new Audi A3 on finance. She works in retail with an annual salary of £14k while her partner works as a hotel receptionist with an annual salary of £17k. They rent a studio flat that probably takes up more than half of their monthly combined salary. What really annoys me is that they both have the option of moving in with their parents who live close by and are more than ademrnt on them doing so, in order for them to save for a flat deposit but they refuse. They both want to be"independent" yet live on credit cards buying fancy new clothes, Virgin active gym membership and and now the flash new car. I told my niece to save for a flat deposit rather than splashing out for a new Audi and putting them both under debt but she just didn't listen. I realise I'm ranting but what can I really do now???
    Originally posted by palgrave

    They earn £30K and you say rent is half of that, £15K for a studio flat? If they live somewhere where studio flats are £1000/month how on earth do you think they will afford a mortgage? Let alone save up for a deposit?


    Also, new cars can end up being affordable, even if not outright cheap. Compared to an older, cheaper car, that may need significant work doing to it regularly, would use more petrol, etc. Also many deals include breakdown, tax, servicing costs.
    And unless you know how much they're actually paying I don't see why you're bringing it up. You can get some very good deals... and German makes are often cheaper than you expect on finance because they hold their value so well that after your 3 years are up the dealer can still sell it on for a good price.


    Ultimately it's their money, don't know why you need to get involved or they need to do what you want. They're living together and sounds like they are enjoying their life. Let them be.


    The days of young people buying houses are long gone. There is nothing wrong with renting.
    • Jackmydad
    • By Jackmydad 19th Apr 17, 1:21 PM
    • 190 Posts
    • 105 Thanks
    Jackmydad
    It's up to them how they spend their money.

    Apart from the payments on the loan the OP made that is. Personally I wouldn't have lent them money, but it needs to be pursued for proper repayment IMHO. Otherwise it's a bad learning experience, in that normally loans do need to be repaid.
    • Herzlos
    • By Herzlos 19th Apr 17, 1:29 PM
    • 5,061 Posts
    • 4,511 Thanks
    Herzlos
    Leasing new cars gives a pretty predictable expense - it's essentially lease payment + fuel. That's ideal for people on a budget, who rely on the car.

    Older cars are generally cheaper to buy, but tend to be inconsistent - repayments + MOT + tyres + repairs etc. My 7-year old car has cost me nothing but the repayments (£120) for about 6 months, then £450 in tyres, then repayments, now an A/C compressor (£600!).
    That's awful to budget for unless you've got a lot of flexibility.
    • motorguy
    • By motorguy 19th Apr 17, 1:30 PM
    • 14,995 Posts
    • 8,432 Thanks
    motorguy
    It's up to them how they spend their money.

    Apart from the payments on the loan the OP made that is. Personally I wouldn't have lent them money, but it needs to be pursued for proper repayment IMHO. Otherwise it's a bad learning experience, in that normally loans do need to be repaid.
    Originally posted by Jackmydad
    Its stunning that the O/P has an issue with his niece and her partner living beyond their means but lent them £15,000 to live beyond their means....
    You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.
    • mohawk1
    • By mohawk1 19th Apr 17, 2:51 PM
    • 10 Posts
    • 0 Thanks
    mohawk1
    Seriously, why are you bothered by this? look after your own business and keep your nose out of others. It has NOTHING to do with you!
    • treboeth
    • By treboeth 19th Apr 17, 3:34 PM
    • 793 Posts
    • 871 Thanks
    treboeth
    Its stunning that the O/P has an issue with his niece and her partner living beyond their means but lent them £15,000 to live beyond their means....
    Originally posted by motorguy
    To be fair the OP and reality don't connect well.
    School starts soon though
    • Zola.
    • By Zola. 19th Apr 17, 3:42 PM
    • 948 Posts
    • 324 Thanks
    Zola.
    Not really anyone's business but the person involved but hey ho!

    The fancy car thing is typical though... its the social media generation, everyone wants to look rich etc, digitalised keeping up with the Jones'
    • motorguy
    • By motorguy 19th Apr 17, 3:52 PM
    • 14,995 Posts
    • 8,432 Thanks
    motorguy

    What really annoys me is that they both have the option of moving in with their parents who live close by and are more than ademrnt on them doing so, in order for them to save for a flat deposit but they refuse.

    I told my niece to save for a flat deposit rather than splashing out for a new Audi and putting them both under debt but she just didn't listen.
    Originally posted by palgrave
    Why are you so insistant your niece puts her life on hold to save for a deposit for a flat when on another thread you put -

    Andy, what's wrong with renting a house? Depending on your circumstances, renting can be far more beneficial to someone. In fact, look at Germany's housing market. Most people there rent.
    Originally posted by palgrave
    You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.
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