Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • EssexHebridean
    • By EssexHebridean 28th Oct 16, 12:08 PM
    • 8,011Posts
    • 41,402Thanks
    EssexHebridean
    EH - Essex > Hebrides...the next step of the adventure?
    • #1
    • 28th Oct 16, 12:08 PM
    EH - Essex > Hebrides...the next step of the adventure? 28th Oct 16 at 12:08 PM
    Well well - here we are again then, new diary as threatened promised - the previous one can be found HERE - there are others too - if I can be bothered to go find them I'll add in some links, otherwise feel free to go stalking if you should wish to!

    Previous diary to the previous one mentioned above...
    ..and the previous one to that, too...

    So, I've been here a while (since 2008, in fact) and can't ever imagine quite managing to leave entirely now. I've made some seriously good friends thanks to this place (Stripes, Cheery, I'm looking at you ladies!) - and for that reason alone I'll hang about like a bad smell for as long as they'll have me. A brief summary of "me" - too short to reach anything interesting, Londoner (full of resentment due to being forced out when we wanted to buy somewhere to live - damned incomers and property prices!) currently living in Essex with MrEH. The username is Essex = for where we are currently, and Hebridean = representing the fact that the long term plan is to move to the ludicrously far-flung but ridiculously beautiful islands off the west coast of Scotland. (as and when the move happens I shall be requesting a change of name to LondonHebridean so nobody even THINK about taking that one, OK?)

    Started on here with a loan and a tenuous grasp on our money, plus a mortgage. Budgeting happened. Am emergency fund was built. We discovered we liked the challenge of teaching financial institutions a lesson. The loan was kicked into touch first off, and then we started the onslaught on the mortgage. Various adventures along the way including losing half my income practically overnight and a 6 year experiment with being self-employed, all good fun. We waved a cheerful goodbye to the mortgage on 30th September this year - paying it off over 12 years early and according to MrEH's clever spreadsheet saving ourselves around £35k in interest had we left it to run to term. Go us, eh?

    So - this is the next chapter, really. While debt free (and that seems amazing) we want to:

    a) Stay that way
    b) Build a savings pot - firstly to ensure that we can at the least put down a chunky deposit against a future "Islandy" dwelling, and secondly to assist with a lifestyle which is less work and more full when we get there.
    c) Do up our existing flat to make it into a fab place for us to live while we're still here, and a desirable rental for when we're not.
    d) Have fun. Lots of it.

    There will be food, regular lunatic visitors (that's this thread, not at home, although sometimes at home too), a reluctance to wield hairbrushes, some Little Red Jets, and hopefully some laughs along the way. Want to join me for the ride? Well I'd be delighted - grab a chair!!
    Last edited by EssexHebridean; 31-10-2016 at 8:54 PM.
    MORTGAGE FREE 30/09/2016
    Sainsbugs 0% card: 22/12/16 £1229.00/£544.67 (17/10/17)
Page 33
    • EssexHebridean
    • By EssexHebridean 5th Oct 17, 8:41 PM
    • 8,011 Posts
    • 41,402 Thanks
    EssexHebridean
    That's good to know Redo - thank you!

    Spoilt for choice for British stuff in Al's and all cheaper than the T's offering. I grabbed a couple of packs of "Everyday Essentials stuff at £1.23 a pack, and then picked up a third pack of a standard British butter for £1.33 mainly because I was curious to see if it tasted any different! (Obviously it won't - in fact I bet it's the self-same stuff in posher wrapping!)

    Anyway while there I did the sensible thing and got a pot of my favourite yogurt, and another chunk of halloumi as a) we like halloumi and b) it was £1.39 which is the sort of bargain price I won't be turning my back on any time soon!
    MORTGAGE FREE 30/09/2016
    Sainsbugs 0% card: 22/12/16 £1229.00/£544.67 (17/10/17)
    • EssexHebridean
    • By EssexHebridean 9th Oct 17, 10:19 AM
    • 8,011 Posts
    • 41,402 Thanks
    EssexHebridean
    Morning all. Hope everyone's weekend was wonderful!

    I confess I'm feeling a bit "adrift" about the forum today following on from a comment from another poster on a different thread yesterday. I've only ever posted on here for two reasons - 1) to ask for help and support myself - which I have had IN SPADES, may I say, and always been grateful for, and 2) to try to offer that same help and support to others - however what I WON'T do - I'd go as far in fact as to say CAN'T do - is to sit back, watch someone making massive mistakes, and pat them on the head and say "well done" for that. I've always been committed to the Money saving stuff from my own perspective - if you're on here regardless of your circumstances I think it's important to take it seriously - as soon as you start "playing at it" it turns into a bit of an insult to those who may be struggling on a whole different level to you, is my view. The very fact that I got the help myself when I started out on here 10 years ago is what makes me want to "give something back" - and I know from the comments and thank you's from new posters who's thread's I've contributed to that I'm seen to have done a good job of offering advice etc in the past. It nearly made me cry recently when someone who'd been a member for a while but had only just asked for help said that they had "hoped I'd comment on their thread" - what a nice thing to say. Apologies, this has turned into a ramble filling in the background - not what I intended. The short of it is, I'm wondering whether I should "butt out" of other's diary threads on here - when I started posting on the diaries board it was essentially an extension of the main DFW board and so it was accepted that people would cheer, support, help and occasionally administer a virtual kick up the behind if they could see mistakes being made - but I'm wondering whether a change has been made to diary threads now being expected to be "cheerleader" threads where constructive criticism isn't what is required. Personally I don't see the point of that - but it may be that I'm behind the times a bit in terms of the way things have moved on here.

    I'm honestly unsure where to go from here - I'll probably continue to post on Stripes & Cheery's threads - they are both "real life" friends and I know them well enough that they would certainly tell me personally if my input was no longer welcome - but as things stand I'm not feeling confident enough to post on other diary threads I don't think. I'll leave subscriptions in place for the time being and will continue reading a lot, I'm sure, while I make up my mind what to do. I'll certainly still be posting on the main DFW board as well. I've always been happy to give up time to post on diary threads on here to support and help, and have always tried to do that to the best of my knowledge and ability, and with kindness, tact, and above all, respect, so being made to feel like some kind of "virtual bully" who adminsters "on-screen batterings" is certainly not what I've ever wanted, and indeed I'm truly horrified and upset to think that my comments have come across that way.
    MORTGAGE FREE 30/09/2016
    Sainsbugs 0% card: 22/12/16 £1229.00/£544.67 (17/10/17)
    • Hiddenidenity
    • By Hiddenidenity 9th Oct 17, 10:35 AM
    • 5,042 Posts
    • 22,841 Thanks
    Hiddenidenity
    Don't stop posting, you've given me invaluable advice and I'll be forever grateful for. I think sometimes it's hard to see how the comments are given online and thing's come across harsher than maybe they would in an actual conversation. Hope this makes sense. ETA I also appreciate the constructive criticism, plus the odd kick up the rear. I think it helps when someone 'on the outside' takes a look and gives advice and then I can think, hmm you know what that's right, I'll try that etc. I also don't think the comment you mentioned was in regards to you if you take a read back you'll notice a few 'new' members comments were more of a bashing than a stop look at this and try this if that makes sense x

    You have helped on so many diaries and the posts on the main boards and I still find myself taking some of the replies you leave to others onboard.

    As for butter.. I miss real butter
    Last edited by Hiddenidenity; 09-10-2017 at 11:15 AM.
    DFW £1388.71/£7348.71 Rent Arrears £511.28/£3381.28

    Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 9th Oct 17, 11:59 AM
    • 4,410 Posts
    • 8,176 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Don't stop posting EH. I think it is hard to sit back and watch others make mistakes but I have always thought your advice is right on the money.

    I have sometimes inadvertently upset some diary writers myself and all you can do is accept that some are occasionally not ready for hearing some things but I think we would be wrong to sit back and say nothing if we can see some are digging themselves into a bigger hole but not ready yet to make the changes to avoid it. This is a forum for encouragement yes but also advice from those who have been there and seen what can happen if the debt is not addressed. That is all you did yesterday if it is on the diary I think you are talking about. I also think the comment was not just addressed to you and maybe the OP was just feeling a bit attacked from several people.
    Countdown to early retirement on 21.12.17 3 months to go.
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 9th Oct 17, 12:46 PM
    • 392 Posts
    • 2,000 Thanks
    redofromstart
    Although I have been on MSE since the very early days, I'm very new to the debt free boards, and as such read and ponder more than offer advice because I just don't have the knowledge.

    I thought hard before I started my own because I just don't (currently) have the horrendous all consuming challenges that some of the other diarists do, and I feel almost guilty to be taking up space. When we were up to our eyeballs I just kept my head down and battered on, and it was only in the final days that I signed up, and that was mostly to keep me on track.

    I would miss your comments on my diary, and would hope that you carry on calling in.
    • Tea&Kittens
    • By Tea&Kittens 9th Oct 17, 1:07 PM
    • 128 Posts
    • 469 Thanks
    Tea&Kittens
    Don't stop posting EH! I've enjoyed your comments on my diary
    I hope you'll stop by and say hi / eat a virtual cheese scone or something .... and feel free to give me a virtual kick up the behind if you think I need it! Part of the reason I joined here and shared my diary was so I feel more accountable, and having someone who has been through the rough giving me pointers, or highlighting where things might improve is going to be a damn sight more helpful than if nobody says anything!
    T&K xx
    October: NSDs 6 / 17 NSDs in a row: 1 / 5
    I started my debtfree journey on 07 September 2017: Total: £20,521 £19847
    Barclaycard: £14659 £14435 Oct 2017 HSBC Credit Card : £3112 £3012 Oct 2017
    Overdraft: 350 £0 Oct2017 MBNA : 2400
    A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. I'm on my way!
    • EssexHebridean
    • By EssexHebridean 9th Oct 17, 1:21 PM
    • 8,011 Posts
    • 41,402 Thanks
    EssexHebridean
    Don't stop posting, you've given me invaluable advice and I'll be forever grateful for. I think sometimes it's hard to see how the comments are given online and thing's come across harsher than maybe they would in an actual conversation. Hope this makes sense. ETA I also appreciate the constructive criticism, plus the odd kick up the rear. I think it helps when someone 'on the outside' takes a look and gives advice and then I can think, hmm you know what that's right, I'll try that etc. I also don't think the comment you mentioned was in regards to you if you take a read back you'll notice a few 'new' members comments were more of a bashing than a stop look at this and try this if that makes sense x

    You have helped on so many diaries and the posts on the main boards and I still find myself taking some of the replies you leave to others onboard.

    As for butter.. I miss real butter
    Originally posted by Hiddenidenity
    Hidden thank you for those lovely comments - appreciated, massively.

    Don't stop posting EH. I think it is hard to sit back and watch others make mistakes but I have always thought your advice is right on the money.

    I have sometimes inadvertently upset some diary writers myself and all you can do is accept that some are occasionally not ready for hearing some things but I think we would be wrong to sit back and say nothing if we can see some are digging themselves into a bigger hole but not ready yet to make the changes to avoid it. This is a forum for encouragement yes but also advice from those who have been there and seen what can happen if the debt is not addressed. That is all you did yesterday if it is on the diary I think you are talking about. I also think the comment was not just addressed to you and maybe the OP was just feeling a bit attacked from several people.
    Originally posted by enthusiasticsaver
    I think we've all been there in terms of having things taken the wrong way ES, and having upset people that way. And that's fine - it's difficult sometimes the way things can come across in writing when you've not got the "softeners" of tone of voice and facial expression to get a true meaning over. There was something particularly hurtful about the wording that was chosen by the OP on that diary though - it felt as though whereas the advice that had been given was kindly meant, the reaction to it was intended to wound, and frankly that really doesn't sit well with me. I unsubscribed from the thread immediately as you can probably imagine, and shan't be returning. I rather think my time is probably spent elsewhere, I'm not and never will be a good "head patter".

    Although I have been on MSE since the very early days, I'm very new to the debt free boards, and as such read and ponder more than offer advice because I just don't have the knowledge.

    I thought hard before I started my own because I just don't (currently) have the horrendous all consuming challenges that some of the other diarists do, and I feel almost guilty to be taking up space. When we were up to our eyeballs I just kept my head down and battered on, and it was only in the final days that I signed up, and that was mostly to keep me on track.

    I would miss your comments on my diary, and would hope that you carry on calling in.
    Originally posted by redofromstart
    Redo thank you - and I totally get what you mean about it being a tough decision on starting a diary because of the circumstances - I nearly didn't start this one, but to be honest I find (well usually!) posting on here SO helpful and love the community spirit that we (mostly!) have here too. I've always been very open about the fact that "technically" I don't "belong" here these days, but that while people feel I've got something to offer I'd like to stick around. I'd love to continue posting on your diary though Redo - thank you for the reassurance (and all the cheese chat!)

    OK - a lot of thinking done and probably more to do. The problem I have is that I've never been someone who just posts on my own diary and rarely elsewhere - I post more "elsewhere" in fact! The idea of just coming in here, posting on my thread and going away again, or putting the occasional largely meaningless platitude elsewhere - no, that's not for me, it would feel pointless aside from anything else, plus my reason for being here still IS at least in part to be able to give something back, as I said. Hmmm. There is of course the point that I'd miss you lot - we have some laughs, don't we!

    I'm not going anywhere immediately anyway - and as I said, I'll still be reading even if I'm not necessarily commenting.
    MORTGAGE FREE 30/09/2016
    Sainsbugs 0% card: 22/12/16 £1229.00/£544.67 (17/10/17)
    • EssexHebridean
    • By EssexHebridean 9th Oct 17, 1:25 PM
    • 8,011 Posts
    • 41,402 Thanks
    EssexHebridean
    Don't stop posting EH! I've enjoyed your comments on my diary
    I hope you'll stop by and say hi / eat a virtual cheese scone or something .... and feel free to give me a virtual kick up the behind if you think I need it! Part of the reason I joined here and shared my diary was so I feel more accountable, and having someone who has been through the rough giving me pointers, or highlighting where things might improve is going to be a damn sight more helpful than if nobody says anything!
    T&K xx
    Originally posted by Tea&Kittens
    T&K you snuck in there while my back was turned. Thank you lovely - your final sentence there basically sums up what I've always felt that DFW Diaries should be all about.

    And if you're going to tempt me with cheese scones,....well!
    MORTGAGE FREE 30/09/2016
    Sainsbugs 0% card: 22/12/16 £1229.00/£544.67 (17/10/17)
    • Hiddenidenity
    • By Hiddenidenity 9th Oct 17, 1:27 PM
    • 5,042 Posts
    • 22,841 Thanks
    Hiddenidenity
    So now you all can talk of real cheese and real butter
    DFW £1388.71/£7348.71 Rent Arrears £511.28/£3381.28

    Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.
    • Seasidegal58
    • By Seasidegal58 9th Oct 17, 2:26 PM
    • 895 Posts
    • 4,685 Thanks
    Seasidegal58
    I've come out of lurkdom to echo everyone else! I always enjoy reading what you have to say and think you give excellent advice - both on the diaries and main debt forums. Sometimes I wonder how you get the time to post all you do! Must have supersonic fingers! Anyway thought I'd add my pennysworth and look forward to plenty more EH posts!
    SSG x
    Finally Debt Free! - July 2016
    Finished Emergency Fund- £10,000 April 2017

    Next Scrimpy Goal - Save for New Kitchen!
    My debt free diary - " Paid off the £31,000 - BUT still scrimping!"
    • DebtFreeDuo
    • By DebtFreeDuo 9th Oct 17, 2:31 PM
    • 175 Posts
    • 771 Thanks
    DebtFreeDuo
    Please don't stop posting, I feel exactly the same as the newbie you described in your post in that you are one person I would want commenting on my diary, I love your approach and if I see a post written by you I will always stop to read it rather than skimming through other posts. Your input here in invaluable in my opinion.
    Debt 14/10/17/20/9/17 5395.16/5690.50 = Loan: 2065.32/2207.38 Car Loan: 2292.94/2419.64 0% CC: 1036.90/1063.48 DFD April 19 (Target Dec 18).
    Make up to £10 a day challenge: £76.84/£150..NSD October 4/15
    • EssexHebridean
    • By EssexHebridean 9th Oct 17, 3:05 PM
    • 8,011 Posts
    • 41,402 Thanks
    EssexHebridean
    You're all lovely.

    Hidden both seem to be a bit of a recurring theme on here! Especially the cheese!
    MORTGAGE FREE 30/09/2016
    Sainsbugs 0% card: 22/12/16 £1229.00/£544.67 (17/10/17)
    • EssexHebridean
    • By EssexHebridean 9th Oct 17, 4:24 PM
    • 8,011 Posts
    • 41,402 Thanks
    EssexHebridean
    OK - quick update following on from the weekend then.

    Main shop: £25 odd
    Also spent literally a few £ each in Al's and Lil's.
    Walked to T's yesterday afternoon as MrEH wanted his newspaper anyway and our aim was top get there for the right time for the bread reductions - which we did. There were a LOT of bagels - we grabbed a cinnamon & raisin pack at 5p, 2 x sesame packs at 8p each and a plain pack also at 8p each - plus a pack of 6 "oven bottom muffins" at 4p. That's over 2 week's worth of lunch "rolls", plus weekend breakfasts, for 33p - the bread machine will NOT be going on for a fortnight! It took a bit of jiggling about (the bagels, not me) to get them all stashed away in the freezer but we did it.

    Yesterday's roast chicken was delicious and the balance was stripped off the carcass straight away and popped in a container in the fridge. Planning to team some of that up with onion, peppers, mushrooms, tomatoes and some smoked paprika and garlic to make a Spanish style chicken stew for tonight (There will be enough of the tomatoey sauce for a second day too so that will probably sort wednesday out.) I got 2 POTW butternut squashes from Lil's so butternut squash risotto might well be another day sorted I think. Quite tempted to do roasted veggies with halloumi & couscous for the remaining day - I'll need to check whether we have eggs that need using before I commit to that though.

    Did my last shop using the T's ClubCard Plus on Friday I guess - as it's discontinued after Friday. The October payment went in this morning, so I promptly stripped it back out again and bounced it back to the Joint Account - need to remember to cancel the DD to Tesco Bank and rejig the monthly payment to our "food" account to include that. Quite sad to see that account go to be honest - it's earned us a fair number of extra CC points over the years, but I confess to being quite pleased to not feel any particular kind of "tie" to T's any more too.

    Oh - my most recent Prolific payout hit Paypal at the weekend so I transferred that out and straight across to the 0% card too - signature updated. I'd still like to get that to £700 paid by the end of the year but a lot will depend on whether I can get another payout from onePoll and also whether I can ever get Populus to payout level I think - I'm STILL short by £4!
    MORTGAGE FREE 30/09/2016
    Sainsbugs 0% card: 22/12/16 £1229.00/£544.67 (17/10/17)
    • redofromstart
    • By redofromstart 9th Oct 17, 5:17 PM
    • 392 Posts
    • 2,000 Thanks
    redofromstart
    Meal plan sounds good to me, although at the moment anything someone else has thought about and cooked has a head start.
    • 117pauline
    • By 117pauline 9th Oct 17, 7:06 PM
    • 308 Posts
    • 4,532 Thanks
    117pauline
    Don't you dare disappear, now that is an order
    Don't get it perfect - Get it going
    Better Than Before
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 9th Oct 17, 7:08 PM
    • 47,671 Posts
    • 172,831 Thanks
    beanielou
    Please dont stop posting EH.
    You are welcome to post on mine
    I think some people do just want people to agree with everything they say even when they are spending silly amounts on foe example on sky & mobiles or whatever. But dont like it when you dare to point it out.
    It is a funny old world.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 9th Oct 17, 7:32 PM
    • 1,372 Posts
    • 3,315 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    I'm a bit late to the party Essex but I'd like to say please don't stop posting on the diaries, or anywhere else on DFW for that matter.

    Some OP's are more willing to be helped than others and some are over sensitive, but your advice is always excellent and given with the best of intentions. If a tiny minority are offended then that is their fault and not yours.

    Please post on my diary because you are a financial wizard and I very much value your input
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt at highest = £58,766
    Current debt = £16,234, Emergency Fund = £200
    Long Hauler No. 156 Spendaholics Anonymous No. 47
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 9th Oct 17, 8:17 PM
    • 47,671 Posts
    • 172,831 Thanks
    beanielou
    Have read relevent part of said thread.
    In total denial & living in cloud cukoo land.
    Dont give it a second thought EH.Really.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • stepuptothepl8
    • By stepuptothepl8 9th Oct 17, 8:42 PM
    • 751 Posts
    • 3,554 Thanks
    stepuptothepl8
    I'm popping out of lurkdom to say please don't stop posting, and commenting.. one of the reasons I have a diary is for the accountability (although tbf I don't post often, I do login most days).. and a virtual kick up the proverbial is sometimes exactly what I need. Hugs.
    LBM 1st Feb 2015 £8789 to go
    my diary: time to step up to the plate. SPC#503
    2017 challenges:
    March - Bath Half Marathon DONE!!
    July - trailwalker 100km walk for Oxfam & the Ghurka trust DONE!!
    • HairyHandofDartmoor
    • By HairyHandofDartmoor 9th Oct 17, 8:42 PM
    • 1,372 Posts
    • 3,315 Thanks
    HairyHandofDartmoor
    Have read relevent part of said thread.
    In total denial & living in cloud cukoo land.
    Dont give it a second thought EH.Really.
    Originally posted by beanielou
    I agree beanie. I stopped commenting on the thread in question because I felt that there was a bit defensiveness and denial going on.

    Everyone has a different approach, but I have never seen Essex be anything other than supportive and helpful.
    Last edited by HairyHandofDartmoor; 09-10-2017 at 8:58 PM.
    My Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5716867
    Debt at highest = £58,766
    Current debt = £16,234, Emergency Fund = £200
    Long Hauler No. 156 Spendaholics Anonymous No. 47
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

1,226Posts Today

8,058Users online

Martin's Twitter
  • Hurrah! The ASA's ruled against 2 fake Facebook ads using my image https://t.co/GvNrqDPOC5 tho Facebook still shows others

  • PS Today's poll is obviously inspired by the real question I was asked and tweeted about last night.

  • Not all firms have panels and HR teams. There are many very small businesses out there without such resources :) https://t.co/cLo0zO7Yqu

  • Follow Martin