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  • FIRST POST
    • redrabbit29
    • By redrabbit29 15th Oct 16, 10:01 PM
    • 1,014Posts
    • 429Thanks
    redrabbit29
    Any other depression sufferers here?
    • #1
    • 15th Oct 16, 10:01 PM
    Any other depression sufferers here? 15th Oct 16 at 10:01 PM
    Just having a bit of a bad time at the minute.

    Funny thing with depression is things can be going absolutely fine and yet you still get caught up. Also, there's usually nothing really identifiable that makes you slip into it.

    I'm 32, and if you saw me or met me you'd think I was a usual "lad" or "normal guy". I like football, I have some jokes, etc...

    Yet I do suffer from depression. Things effect me at different times. If I'm feeling good then for months on end it doesn't even phase me. However like now it can get me.

    The funny thing is, even missing a train makes it worse, or losing some money, or forgetting something. Embarassingly it makes me feel sorry for myself. I hate that.

    This is not a sad post... I'm just saying how it is. I'm absolutely fine, yet I do feel quite sh**tty at the moment
    Amo L'Italia
Page 2
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 17th Oct 16, 7:14 PM
    • 21,503 Posts
    • 75,551 Thanks
    Pyxis
    Same, reading these stories has made me feel better in a weird way. Good to have support with these things, even if it's online.
    Originally posted by Andrew Ryan 89
    I find it helps knowing that you're not alone with these feelings, particularly when people say that they know what those feelings are like.
    Depression can be very isolating, even if you have lots of people around you, so knowing that there are others who share those experiences is comforting. (Even though you wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy!)
    It is, after all, an illness like any other!
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, P.P..
    ¥ ¥ ¥
    X ~O
    • goodwithsaving
    • By goodwithsaving 17th Oct 16, 7:25 PM
    • 359 Posts
    • 558 Thanks
    goodwithsaving
    I've had depression for many years, more of my life than not. It's an up and down, sometimes dormant for a long time and then it flares up.
    I've found, it helps to be honest. Sometimes my character can be quite Jekyll and Hyde, and I truly can't help it. I always apologise immediately and I have found that sending people the Black Dog video helps them understand why I am sometimes the way I am. I don't hide it, there's no shame. Recently I have succumbed to a major low and have found everyone around me to be so incredibly supportive. I feel lonely, I feel isolated but I've never felt like I can't express that.
    So talk to people, if you don't want to go out much invest in a television package and a good sofa, buy a good bed to sleep well and most importantly, have a goal a day. Mine is just going out to get a coffee and sit reading a newspaper in the coffee shop on a Sunday, or even just going for a long country walk on a Saturday.

    But most of all; talk about it.
    Every time you borrow money, you’re robbing your future self. –Nathan W. Morris
    • Sam Fallow
    • By Sam Fallow 17th Oct 16, 7:31 PM
    • 499 Posts
    • 1,058 Thanks
    Sam Fallow
    I'm 32, and if you saw me or met me you'd think I was a usual "lad" or "normal guy". I like football, I have some jokes, etc...
    Originally posted by redrabbit29
    Pyxis

    Anyone meeting me casually, would think I was fine;
    Originally posted by LameWolf
    I'm the same, I can run a few errands, talk to different people and engage in light, brief conversation and then run home, unable to continue the act any longer. The pretence is exhausting.

    If I'm having a bad day, nobody sees me, I make sure of that.

    Today I motivate myself to go for a ride on my motorbike (the last personal pleasure I have left) but before I even got on it I tripped and took a heavy fall. That was my day finished, I know better than to try anything after that.

    Hope everyone else is having a 'good' day.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 17th Oct 16, 7:51 PM
    • 21,503 Posts
    • 75,551 Thanks
    Pyxis
    I'm the same, I can run a few errands, talk to different people and engage in light, brief conversation and then run home, unable to continue the act any longer. The pretence is exhausting.

    If I'm having a bad day, nobody sees me, I make sure of that.

    Today I motivate myself to go for a ride on my motorbike (the last personal pleasure I have left) but before I even got on it I tripped and took a heavy fall. That was my day finished, I know better than to try anything after that.

    Hope everyone else is having a 'good' day.
    Originally posted by Sam Fallow
    Yes, it's amazing what good actors we can be!
    There should be an Oscar for Best Performance in Acting Being Normal!
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, P.P..
    ¥ ¥ ¥
    X ~O
    • Sleazy
    • By Sleazy 17th Oct 16, 8:07 PM
    • 2,689 Posts
    • 2,492 Thanks
    Sleazy
    There's a physiological reason for the three a.m. dip.

    Certain metabolic functions are at their lowest ebb, certain hormones etc. are at their least optimum levels.

    At 3a.m. the body is physiologically and biochemically at its most vulnerable.

    It's no coincidence that more people die at or around 3a.m. than at other times of the day, for that very reason .
    Originally posted by Pyxis
    Makes sense - in the process of being dismissed on capability grounds (stress related), and frequently used to wake up at exactly 3 am, couldn't sleep so used to get up, get exhausted .... that round robin. A lot better now on medication, but still don't open letters for days on end, just let things go really.

    However, I am confident that things WILL get better, and as other posters have already mentioned walking or being outside in the sun can help change your outlook. I enjoy dropping Mrs. Sleazy off at work, going into town for a coffee and just chilling out for an hour or so. That's about as 'normal' as I can get at the moment. Doctor hopes that at some time in the future I may be able to work part-time, but currently signed off indefinitely....
    *** IF IN DOUBT, BLAME BREXIT ***
    • *max*
    • By *max* 18th Oct 16, 12:08 AM
    • 2,745 Posts
    • 12,871 Thanks
    *max*
    Thank you Sam.

    I would add these:-

    Depression is the thief that robs you of hope.

    It turns the smallest of everyday tasks into an unscaleable mountain.

    It turns the smallest of everyday tasks into a Thing to be feared, and then that fear itself becomes a Thing To Be Feared.

    Depression is the thief that robs you of hope, robs you of your sense of self, robs you of your sense of worth.
    Originally posted by Pyxis
    If only I could thank this more than once!
    • Bryando
    • By Bryando 18th Oct 16, 2:10 AM
    • 1,367 Posts
    • 413 Thanks
    Bryando
    I suffer also. Been up/down for years and seen inside psychiatric wards in the past. Just lost my job due to being so low. Now I have a partner saying I am lazy as sit on the pc all day.

    My mood goes up and like so for a while then crashes and I punish myself. Taking a packet of Paracetamol for example. Or recently was going to crash into a wall.

    I HATE it and would allow my legs to be cut off if it meant no mental issues. As for the partner thought it was a supportive relationship but pondering tbh.

    Being low I lack no motivation at all.
    Last edited by Bryando; 18-10-2016 at 2:13 AM.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 18th Oct 16, 9:55 AM
    • 21,503 Posts
    • 75,551 Thanks
    Pyxis
    I suffer also. Been up/down for years and seen inside psychiatric wards in the past. Just lost my job due to being so low. Now I have a partner saying I am lazy as sit on the pc all day.

    My mood goes up and like so for a while then crashes and I punish myself. Taking a packet of Paracetamol for example. Or recently was going to crash into a wall.

    I HATE it and would allow my legs to be cut off if it meant no mental issues. As for the partner thought it was a supportive relationship but pondering tbh.

    Being low I lack no motivation at all.
    Originally posted by Bryando
    It is very hard for people close to you, and I can understand how they can get despondent and maybe even lose patience. I'm not sure what the answer is to that except to try to make sure that they are as knowledgeable as possible about the condition.

    Perhaps also things like attending the doctor together, counselling sessions together, going to help groups together, so that they can see it isn't the sufferer 'deliberately' choosing to remain in a depressed state.

    I keep making the analogy with physical illnesses because that is such an easy way for non-sufferers to understand part of the problem........

    ....If you had a broken leg that prevented you from working, that would be completely understandable to everyone. A 'broken' mind is equally debilitating, yet not nearly so easily mended.

    Or, if you had flu, you would feel too ill to talk, or even to read a book or watch TV. 'Flu of the brain', ie Depression, is like that too.


    If you are able to, a tiny bit of compromise might smooth the way with your partner. For example, if they want you to go shopping with them, and that puts the fear of God into you, what about, firstly explaining that, but then saying how about if you go for half an hour, and if it is getting too much, you go and have a quiet coffee and a sit, say for another half hour, until your partner joins you?
    Something like that?

    Small steps, you see. Showing willing, even when feeling like the proverbial s**t.
    It will be exhausting, I know. And if you are feeling very bad, it might not be possible.
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, P.P..
    ¥ ¥ ¥
    X ~O
    • catkins
    • By catkins 18th Oct 16, 9:59 AM
    • 5,205 Posts
    • 10,809 Thanks
    catkins
    Yes, it's amazing what good actors we can be!
    There should be an Oscar for Best Performance in Acting Being Normal!
    Originally posted by Pyxis
    So so true. The only people that actually know I suffer from depression are my OH and my siblings. Even my parents don't know. If I am really down I don't go and visit them.

    I was working somewhere with about 20 other people and one day they started talking about depression. I said that I suffered and they all looked amazed, a couple laughed and one literally accused me of being a liar (I think they thought I was just seeking attention). I had worked with them for about 5 years at the time and yet not one of them had a clue that I suffered.
    The world is over 4 billion years old and yet you somehow managed to exist at the same time as David Bowie
    • Scorpio33
    • By Scorpio33 18th Oct 16, 10:37 AM
    • 352 Posts
    • 550 Thanks
    Scorpio33
    Depression is a very weird thing. When I was younger, depression and anxiety used to drive me forward career and health wise. I was awkward around girls and literally had no friends, so I worked to jobs so that way I was at least richer than my peers. I also used to go gym so I would be in shape when I did meet that girl.

    Then something weird happened. I started making friends. Met a beautiful girl who ended up being my wife. I had dreams of earning £25k a year, now I earn £50k. Never thought I would own my own home, now I have 2 bedrooms and a garden. Everything I dreamt about, things I genuinely thought was not possible, have all come. However, the anxiety that drove me is gone but the depression remains. I simply don't care.

    I wake up everyday and I can't be bothered to work, and not worried at all about the consequences of not being so. I count the weeks left where my insurance policy will pay out for suicide. Waste my whole day daydreaming and staring out the window.

    I can't figure out what it is that will get me back on track. What I can do to get my mojo back. Sadly, it could just be a chemical thing that I have little to no control of.
    Originally posted by Andrew Ryan 89

    You are writing my life as I see it!!


    I have PMd you.
    • morocha
    • By morocha 18th Oct 16, 1:11 PM
    • 1,543 Posts
    • 3,446 Thanks
    morocha
    Could anybody PM me that support group, please ?
    I am back on medication... week 4 and now and again depending on the day have a little bit of energy.
    Mejor morir de pie que vivir toda una vida de rodillas.
    • Andrew Ryan 89
    • By Andrew Ryan 89 19th Oct 16, 5:49 PM
    • 417 Posts
    • 239 Thanks
    Andrew Ryan 89
    So, if one is suffering from depression, is it simply a case of seeing your GP, letting them know and they refer you to counselling?
    • tiger eyes
    • By tiger eyes 19th Oct 16, 6:02 PM
    • 922 Posts
    • 2,330 Thanks
    tiger eyes
    So, if one is suffering from depression, is it simply a case of seeing your GP, letting them know and they refer you to counselling?
    Originally posted by Andrew Ryan 89
    Pretty much. You tell your GP about the symptoms you're experiencing (you can bring a written list if you're worried you might get emotional during the appointment) and they ask you some questions and possibly give you the PHQ. They may prescribe medication and/or refer you to some form of therapy. GPs see this very commonly and they're used to diagnosing and treating depression.

    Please do tell them if you have thoughts of self-harm or suicide - it's a significant symptom.
    • Andrew Ryan 89
    • By Andrew Ryan 89 20th Oct 16, 7:17 PM
    • 417 Posts
    • 239 Thanks
    Andrew Ryan 89
    Another similar question. Does getting treatment for mental issues have any repercussions I should consider? Is it something I may have to declare on a job application form? I pretty sure you will have to do it with life insurance, would this make the cost sky rocket?
    • Nomoonatall
    • By Nomoonatall 20th Oct 16, 7:42 PM
    • 1,132 Posts
    • 2,885 Thanks
    Nomoonatall
    So, if one is suffering from depression, is it simply a case of seeing your GP, letting them know and they refer you to counselling?
    Originally posted by Andrew Ryan 89
    Depends on your area...it could be a year long waiting list...and then the referrals are cancelled...for the next few years. Or they could just keep piling on different antidepressants for the next 40 years.

    Yes, I'm cynical, tired and very depressed. I wish everybody well x
    Last edited by Nomoonatall; 21-10-2016 at 4:53 PM.
    • ska lover
    • By ska lover 21st Oct 16, 1:28 PM
    • 2,474 Posts
    • 5,867 Thanks
    ska lover
    The worst part of depression for me - would be waking up in the morning, not having the motivation to do anything. A no care attitude towards life itself. I know an excellent place to chat for depression sufferers. If you are interested. I'll send it to you in a private message. It's open 24/7 with a safe, friendly community.☺
    Originally posted by TE1979

    Please can you pm me this info
    Blah blah blah.
    • comeandgo
    • By comeandgo 21st Oct 16, 1:45 PM
    • 1,318 Posts
    • 1,690 Thanks
    comeandgo
    Another similar question. Does getting treatment for mental issues have any repercussions I should consider? Is it something I may have to declare on a job application form? I pretty sure you will have to do it with life insurance, would this make the cost sky rocket?
    Originally posted by Andrew Ryan 89
    Hi Andrew, I was thinking of fostering but did not go ahead as thought with depression and medication I would not be considered. Holiday insurance goes up a bit, I don't have/need life insurance, get it with my work. I did get counselling and it did nothing for me. There is a web site, moodjuice, which may give you help, it is a national health site and different areas have different web addresses so just google it.
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