Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 15th Sep 16, 12:52 PM
    • 2,757Posts
    • 8,940Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    How do you get the Old Style love back?
    • #1
    • 15th Sep 16, 12:52 PM
    How do you get the Old Style love back? 15th Sep 16 at 12:52 PM
    It has been a tough time with drama, courts and custody but hopefully (touch wood / fingers crossed etc.) things are settling down.

    But I have got lazy ...... I used to love all the old fashioned homemaking stuff and really put an effort into fitting it into my day. Between the stress, working shifts, and studying it has got pushed further and further down the list to the point where I run about all day achieving nothing that I want to do!

    I seem to have lost my old style motivation. And I really want it back!! I used to love my bargain hunting and cooking from scratch and baking ...........

    How do you get back on track?
    If you love life, life will love you back.
Page 1
    • katkin
    • By katkin 15th Sep 16, 2:32 PM
    • 526 Posts
    • 4,556 Thanks
    katkin
    • #2
    • 15th Sep 16, 2:32 PM
    • #2
    • 15th Sep 16, 2:32 PM
    Bit by bit. Little easy goals.

    Don't overwhelm yourself.

    What about doing a stock take of the cupboards, freezer. Do a menu plan around this with necessity shopping.

    Best of luck, it's like riding a bike you'll be back into it in no time at all!x
    • Larumbelle
    • By Larumbelle 15th Sep 16, 2:47 PM
    • 2,067 Posts
    • 10,111 Thanks
    Larumbelle
    • #3
    • 15th Sep 16, 2:47 PM
    • #3
    • 15th Sep 16, 2:47 PM
    I agree, baby steps Don't try to change everything at once, it will stress you. Just do one thing at a time, starting with the thing that you enjoy most or the thing that you think will benefit you most. But don't try to dive in and do it all at once, that will leave you frazzled and you won't enjoy it at all, and in turn you won't stick to it. It is perfectly acceptable to pick and choose the OS ways that work for you, and ditch whatever isn't important to you or doesn't fit in with your life and lifestyle!

    Figure out what motivates you to be old-style, and keep that motivation uppermost in your mind. If you remember why an OS way is important to you, it is more likely that you will stick to whatever change you make. Over time, little changes become habits and require little thought or effort. Then you can add another change, and so on.


    • MrsLurcherwalker
    • By MrsLurcherwalker 15th Sep 16, 2:55 PM
    • 10,277 Posts
    • 132,508 Thanks
    MrsLurcherwalker
    • #4
    • 15th Sep 16, 2:55 PM
    • #4
    • 15th Sep 16, 2:55 PM
    First you have to find your balance again and catch your breath until the new world settles down and becomes familiar and stable for you love. Upheaval of any kind means things go awry in every part of life so don't beat yourself up over loosing OS motivation, be understanding to yourself and wait for the need to become OS to be at the forefront of your needs and then change one thing in life to OS ways and stick with that and only that until it becomes normal, then add in another thing until that also becomes normal. It can be something as small as choosing an economy brand of baked beans, small steps woven in until they are the norm one at a time very soon add up to a whole OS lifestyle, Good Luck, you'll get there xxx.
    Go forward with the vision even if no one else can see it!

    Some people use words to reflect who they want to be, but actions ALWAYS show who they really are!
    • DigForVictory
    • By DigForVictory 15th Sep 16, 3:17 PM
    • 5,525 Posts
    • 13,664 Thanks
    DigForVictory
    • #5
    • 15th Sep 16, 3:17 PM
    • #5
    • 15th Sep 16, 3:17 PM
    Have you the time you'll need to OS? As wonderful though scouring charity shops & home cooking & so forth are, they take up hours you may have to accept aren't spare yet.
    Start with tagging 5 OS pleasures in your day? Just to get your eye for an OS pleasure back in?
    • suki1964
    • By suki1964 15th Sep 16, 3:44 PM
    • 9,031 Posts
    • 19,583 Thanks
    suki1964
    • #6
    • 15th Sep 16, 3:44 PM
    • #6
    • 15th Sep 16, 3:44 PM
    Can only echo the above, baby steps. One little thing that can be slotted in and becomes second nature, then the next, the next

    Taken me years to get as far as I am and I'm not even hardcore
    if you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it
    • dandy-candy
    • By dandy-candy 15th Sep 16, 4:13 PM
    • 1,650 Posts
    • 7,913 Thanks
    dandy-candy
    • #7
    • 15th Sep 16, 4:13 PM
    • #7
    • 15th Sep 16, 4:13 PM
    Envisaged what you want your home to be. I used to love the brambly hedge books and when I had kids I wanted a home of home cooked meals, lovely hm cakes, reading them bedtime stories, making them toys and lots of playtime and cuddles. And that is what I did.

    You have to imagine your dream home life and work towards it, and unless you want a Porsche and a yacht (if so you're on the wrong boards lol ) then you can do it
    • VfM4meplse
    • By VfM4meplse 15th Sep 16, 4:17 PM
    • 19,842 Posts
    • 38,890 Thanks
    VfM4meplse
    • #8
    • 15th Sep 16, 4:17 PM
    • #8
    • 15th Sep 16, 4:17 PM
    How do you get back on track?
    Originally posted by Angel_Jenny
    The most effective catalyst is running out of money! Necessity is the mother...

    A quiet life is very under-rated.
    Value-for-money-for-me-puhleeze!

    "No man is worth, crawling on the earth"- adapted from Bob Crewe and Bob Gaudio

    Hope is not a strategy ...A child is for life, not just 18 years....Don't get me started on the NHS, because you won't win...If in doubt, don't pull out... I love chaz-ing!
    • FairyPrincessk
    • By FairyPrincessk 15th Sep 16, 5:16 PM
    • 2,038 Posts
    • 20,564 Thanks
    FairyPrincessk
    • #9
    • 15th Sep 16, 5:16 PM
    • #9
    • 15th Sep 16, 5:16 PM
    I agree with all of the above. Baby steps--choose one thing to focus on first. Don't beat yourself up for things. I also use films and books when I'm low on inspiration. Seeing the strength and innovation of other people inspires me! Don't forget the fun stuff. Meal planning and scratch meals for every day and budgeting will get you far, but it is also ok to splash out on some flowers (I like geraniums for an OS feel) or treat yourself to a cocoa or an afternoon reading a novel or baking. Try to get the fun and adventure back and the rest will follow.
    • Blackbeard of Perranporth
    • By Blackbeard of Perranporth 15th Sep 16, 6:19 PM
    • 3,761 Posts
    • 22,324 Thanks
    Blackbeard of Perranporth
    How does BoP get the old style love magic back?

    I chase BoPsie round the bed, and give her a big slap every night. She gets cuddles as well. Works fine!
    Two Lovers
    Siting on a bench in Sydney Park
    • amandaatnumber7
    • By amandaatnumber7 16th Sep 16, 12:08 AM
    • 136 Posts
    • 1,188 Thanks
    amandaatnumber7
    I fall in and out with OS, in my heart I love OS and so does my hubby but I'm only human and get caught up in 'keeping up with the Joneses' and like you when something stressful happens (we've been through the wringer with our eldest this year) I fall back into bad habits.
    My first port of call is this forum, I find it inspiring and it really helps me get back on track and I know it might sound silly to some but if I can find the time usually of an evening I watch an OS movie or series.
    I start in the kitchen as food is our biggest expense apart from the mortgage. So no more takeaways, hm cake and biscuits, take our own snacks and drinks when we go out and eventually will get around to charity shops, I do love it but its hard with 2 little boys in tow
    • Caterina
    • By Caterina 16th Sep 16, 9:28 AM
    • 5,227 Posts
    • 34,764 Thanks
    Caterina
    I started a similar thread a while back, it really resonated with a lot of people. I think that OS is a movable feast, sometimes you are on, sometimes off, depending on how the circumstances of life change.

    Just by expressing your feelings in this board means that you are "on the up" again and ready to reintroduce OS principles in your life.

    Go with what feels right, it might be food, or curbing a magazine/latte/makeup/whatever habit, or saving all your change in a jar at the end of each day...there are as many OS things to choose as there are OSers, we are all different, even if we follow this lifestyle. Some things would be right for you and not for others.

    For me, I am starting again in earnest in having more NSDs, trying to find lovely and enjoyable pursuits that don't cost money.

    Good luck, I look forward to reading about your progress.
    2016 NSDs so far: 2
    From September 2016: 1
    • Uhtred Ragnarsson
    • By Uhtred Ragnarsson 16th Sep 16, 11:22 AM
    • 51 Posts
    • 193 Thanks
    Uhtred Ragnarsson
    I prefer to think of it as a scale - call it being on the OS Scale. You may move up and down it and of course there are those who are firmly wedged at one end or the other. In my head I picture the scale as being between 1 and 100. At this point in time I'm sitting at around 40 .
    Fate is everything
    • MrsTinks
    • By MrsTinks 16th Sep 16, 12:02 PM
    • 14,262 Posts
    • 21,250 Thanks
    MrsTinks
    I dip in and out of OS too - think I always have

    Most things have an OS option and a non-OS option (or several!) - some times I choose OS, sometimes I choose convenience. I have however stopped beating myself up over it

    So tonight I'll be making banana loaf - because I have bananas and I finally found my recipe! Yay! But I've had a horrid week and with a frozen shoulder I've done NO housework (flying has just not been possible ) so I might need to get a cleaner in next week to help me catch up as I work full time and sometimes late... So that won't be OS in the least. I'm trying to do a freezer challenge too as I need to get a grip of what is in there before we head off on holiday in a months time. SO if I OS in one area others might slip - it's ok... we can only do as much as we can
    Sept 2016 - £10811 to clear FlyLady challenge taken up! Declutter 50 items in Sept target: 1/50 Make £10 extra a day in Sept: £110/£300
    DFW Nerd #025...well that's embarrassing...
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 22nd Sep 16, 6:03 PM
    • 2,757 Posts
    • 8,940 Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    Thank you all! I am a bit of a perfectionist which tends to mean I procrastinate or build tasks up in my head and never actually get started ......

    It is tricky too as I am the only one at home into this stuff. Really need to cut back on spending - just popping to the supermarket is £20 minimum gone on just random stuff.

    I make myself sound so old to my partner's children when I tell them that a day trip when I was growing up was either a drive around and lunch at a truck stop, a picnic on the moors or a trip to the seaside for chips by the sea. Now it seems to be all theme parks and expense! And it wasn't all that long ago .......

    I already get jokes that I was born in the wrong era with my aprons and wanting to learn old fashioned crafts.
    If you love life, life will love you back.
    • Angel_Jenny
    • By Angel_Jenny 22nd Sep 16, 6:07 PM
    • 2,757 Posts
    • 8,940 Thanks
    Angel_Jenny
    Envisaged what you want your home to be. I used to love the brambly hedge books and when I had kids I wanted a home of home cooked meals, lovely hm cakes, reading them bedtime stories, making them toys and lots of playtime and cuddles. And that is what I did.

    You have to imagine your dream home life and work towards it, and unless you want a Porsche and a yacht (if so you're on the wrong boards lol ) then you can do it
    Originally posted by dandy-candy
    Oh my - how lovely you make that sound! I love that cosy idea of children coming in from school to home made cookies and a cold glass of milk. And bedtime stories - especially at Christmas. Unfortunately though that stuff won't be possible.

    House-wise I want cosy and welcoming rather than show home perfect. I want some Brambly Hedge books now ...........
    If you love life, life will love you back.
    • suki1964
    • By suki1964 22nd Sep 16, 6:31 PM
    • 9,031 Posts
    • 19,583 Thanks
    suki1964
    Thank you all! I am a bit of a perfectionist which tends to mean I procrastinate or build tasks up in my head and never actually get started ......

    It is tricky too as I am the only one at home into this stuff. Really need to cut back on spending - just popping to the supermarket is £20 minimum gone on just random stuff.

    I make myself sound so old to my partner's children when I tell them that a day trip when I was growing up was either a drive around and lunch at a truck stop, a picnic on the moors or a trip to the seaside for chips by the sea. Now it seems to be all theme parks and expense! And it wasn't all that long ago .......

    I already get jokes that I was born in the wrong era with my aprons and wanting to learn old fashioned crafts.
    Originally posted by Angel_Jenny
    My DH wonders at times what century I was born

    GS is 10 tomorrow and he loves that we are kind of old style.

    He gets internet connection but he also gets that veg comes out the ground, cakes and buscuits are made and there's no such thing as a home delivery. He loves that when I've lifted him and he says I'm hungry and I make him fresh pancakes

    He loves a glass of milk and a cookie ( he made) for supper


    I'm no perfectionist. I do what I can. Show the kids another way it's up to them
    if you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim's to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

66Posts Today

2,504Users online

Martin's Twitter