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  • FIRST POST
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 27th Jul 16, 10:00 AM
    • 848Posts
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    debtaghh
    I want to stop drowning
    • #1
    • 27th Jul 16, 10:00 AM
    I want to stop drowning 27th Jul 16 at 10:00 AM
    Hi,

    I am not sure where to start or what I want from this but here goes ...

    We are in major debt and things seem to be getting worse, I have been looking at this site for years and know there is no point me posting my soa as we literally can't cut back any more e.g

    food shop for fam of 5 £240- if you can help me reduce this then that would be great. I shop at Aldi, Lidl etc and have most shops locally.
    We just got rid of sky and have reduced mobiles, gas etc.

    We can't do an iva or dmp etc as we are in rented accomadation and I know estate agents can use guarantors etc but we don't have one plus they are not that keen as I have mentioned it before to them. Where we live , it's really hard to rent as there are limited properties and having bad credit would just go against us which we really can't do.

    Our biggest issues are that I do things that I end up regretting e.g booking holidays in the uk which still add up, book parties for the kids etc. I don't know how we got into so much debt but assume it must be down to this and i've never been on a good salary. My business has been hit badly and never recovered. I'm currently looking for a part time job but can't see this happening soon as I need it to be enough salary to cover childcare for my baby. My husband is on a good salary but works shifts which means I can't rely on him for childcare help and we don't have any family that can help us. I've tried working for direct selling companies and sell things on music magpie, ebay and gumtree ( I literally have nothing else to sell). I use cashbaack sites too and did do surverys but never seem to be eligible but will stary back with that- any recommendations for good ones? Or any ideas of making more money from home?

    We are due to go away soon and I would love to have advice on how we can save money on food whilst staying at a hotel, I thought I will bring snacks from home and croissants, drink cartons for breakfast but don't want to be speending loads on lunch and dinners.

    I also feel pressure from my family when it comes to birthdays and christmas time with regards to buying expensive pressies. We have a holiday booked at christmas too ( I know not ideal).

    I supoose I'm writng this to start afresh as I can't carry on like this anymore. I am severly depressed and wake up exhausted every day and have no motivation to do anything. I feel like we are drowing in debt. I am currently receiving cbt but in all honesty the crux of the situation is the debt is the issue. I'm sick of having regrets and living life like this so fingers crossed to new me, it' going to take years but here goes.....
Page 35
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 1st Dec 17, 11:13 AM
    • 4,827 Posts
    • 9,110 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Well done. If you keep on being as frugal as that it will help your chances of getting more 0% deals next summer. Congratulations on getting rid of the Tesco card. Are you leaving it open in case they offer you another 0% deal next year or closing it?
    2 weeks to go until early retirement in December . Debt free and mortgage free.

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 1st Dec 17, 11:21 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Well done. If you keep on being as frugal as that it will help your chances of getting more 0% deals next summer. Congratulations on getting rid of the Tesco card. Are you leaving it open in case they offer you another 0% deal next year or closing it?
    Originally posted by enthusiasticsaver
    I was thinking Iíll keep it open in hope they offer me a deal. They have just offered me a deal but itís rubbish 0% until October next year plus transfer fees. Hopefully by next summer when the deals are due to end they can offer me a longer period of 0%.

    To save even more Iím asking my fam if they want to buy some of my kids pressies off me.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 2nd Dec 17, 7:22 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Morning,

    Yesterday I went to a friendís house and normally I would buy something sweet from the bakers but instead I bought something I had from home, that saved a few pounds! Today we are buying a Christmas tree, I have money allocated but am hoping to spend less than what I allocated. My son has a party to go to and the present is something I bought on offer a while ago. I need to go food shopping at some point but Iím trying to make do with what I have. I do have £6 going onto my Iceland card today which will be useful.

    Have a nice frugal day everyone.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 2nd Dec 17, 4:44 PM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    The Xmas tree was £8 cheaper then I allocated which is good as I have some extra work this week so will need to pay for childcare on the day which I hadn’t allocated ( I won’t get paid for this work until end of Jan. I’m trying to get out of a meal booked with friends , I’ve made out that it’s so busy at this time of the year and hinted about the cost. I’m just waiting to hear back from one more friend to confirm they are ok with cancelling. That will save approx £20.
    Last edited by debtaghh; 02-12-2017 at 4:47 PM.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 3rd Dec 17, 8:00 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Morning,

    I’ve managed to get out of one meal ... approx £20 saving My husband is due to take an exam next year which could eventually lead to a promotion but the books cost £80 which I have accounted for but I’ve asked him if he can share with his friend who is doing the same exam. That way it will be £40 each instead.

    If I’m being honest this minimum increase has really shocked me as I would have never thought that’s what they can do , it’s kind of made me more determined to get rid of this debt once and for all!

    I’ve managed to sell some of the Xmas presents I bought to my family, that will be another £50

    I still haven’t been food shopping, I think I’ll buy some grapes and tomatoes and try and delay a proper (£30) shop for a bit longer!

    Have a lovely frugal day everyone.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 3rd Dec 17, 8:44 AM
    • 4,827 Posts
    • 9,110 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver

    If Iím being honest this minimum increase has really shocked me as I would have never thought thatís what they can do , itís kind of made me more determined to get rid of this debt once and for all!

    .
    Originally posted by debtaghh
    Credit card companies which allow low minimum payments effectively keep people in debt for decades which is not in your interests at all. If the minimums had been at a sensible level all along you would have been forced to give the debt priority when it was at a much lower level than it is now which would have made it easier to clear. It is not always going to be easy to get 0% deals so I think reining in your spending and doing as you have been doing for the last few days is very sensible. Think about every penny you are spending and focusing on clearing it is the way to go now.
    2 weeks to go until early retirement in December . Debt free and mortgage free.

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 3rd Dec 17, 8:51 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Credit card companies which allow low minimum payments effectively keep people in debt for decades which is not in your interests at all. If the minimums had been at a sensible level all along you would have been forced to give the debt priority when it was at a much lower level than it is now which would have made it easier to clear. It is not always going to be easy to get 0% deals so I think reining in your spending and doing as you have been doing for the last few days is very sensible. Think about every penny you are spending and focusing on clearing it is the way to go now.
    Originally posted by enthusiasticsaver
    I completely agree.

    Iíve also decided to contact a friend who has been offering me a job ( I used to help out there) . It isnít what I want to do but can bring in a few hundred extra a month ( potentially more) as I canít work around dh shifts. Me and dh had a massive argument last night and itís all due to the stress of money. I wonít allow this debt to break us up therefore it needs going ASAP. Iíve just swallowed my pride and contacted him and will hopefully get some extra money coming in... Iíll keep you posted.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 3rd Dec 17, 9:15 AM
    • 4,827 Posts
    • 9,110 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    That would certainly help if you bring in more income even if it is not what you want to do in the short term. Clearing debt is stressful and as your OH has not been fully engaged with it so far then no doubt reining in your spending even further is not going to be easy for either of you. It is however necessary for your long term future.
    2 weeks to go until early retirement in December . Debt free and mortgage free.

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 3rd Dec 17, 9:37 AM
    • 884 Posts
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    Cumbria lass
    Have had visitors past few days so only caught up with you now. Sorry to hear you are stressed with it all.

    I think getting a job , and reining in your spending as you have done is great. Sometimes it needs a shock to get you refocused.

    You are doing really well, keep going.
    Nov 2017 CC1 £3329 CC2 £600

    Debt Free Nov 2019: earlier if I have my way
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 4th Dec 17, 7:16 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Thanks Cumbria.

    I returned an item yesterday-£40 going back into my account. My dh has messaged his friend about sharing books and paying half each.

    I randomly received an email from nectar yesterday saying they have given me £5 worth of points for free. I donít really shop in Sainsburyís but will now have 2500 worth but this is from special promotions and has taken months. Iím saving them up for next summer as Iím hoping they will do their deal again where 1000 points gets you two mains at pizza express or two cinema tickets.

    Dh went to the shops for me and used my £6 bonus card in Iceland plus got 10% discount that they are currently offering for the emergency services so spent £5 cash. He then went to Tesco and spent £11. Havenít been for a proper shop in over a week.

    Today I need to:

    Check finances
    Answer business email
    Dust
    Sort kitchen out
    Washing
    Post items
    Maybe return item
    Buy bread... I never run out as I usually have lots in the freezer but Iíve actually run out!

    Have a lovely frugal day everyone.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 4th Dec 17, 2:28 PM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Dhís friend has agreed to go halves ... £40 saving
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 4th Dec 17, 6:50 PM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Another £84 of returned goods and £57 worth of presents being bought off me.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 5th Dec 17, 6:23 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Morning,

    Another £70 paid off the Nuba. I checked my Tesco cc and itís so nice seeing £0 balance. Nuba now stands at £1590.

    Iím due to go out for dinner this weekend but am wondering if itís worth just losing the £5 deposit paid instead of paying another £20🤔

    Still havenít been for a food shop but think I may have to go today. Iím hoping to spend less than £30. It becomes quite addictive challenging yourself.

    We still havenít heard from dhís barclaycard so Iím assuming and hoping that his hasnít gone up. Even if his goes up in six months time Iím hoping by then the minimums will be reduced. Iím just focusing on debt clearing as much as possible. Iíve been doing quite a few surveys lately.

    Have a lovely frugal day.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 5th Dec 17, 6:28 AM
    • 884 Posts
    • 4,512 Thanks
    Cumbria lass
    Remember to keep debt busting balanced, if you have loads of outings planned then cancelling some seems sensible, if not and you cancel everything you may get resentful of it.

    Some people might not agree and say no fun until it's all paid off but I couldn't do that. Maybe look at the crowd going , do you really want to go out with them , if not cancel .

    Have a good day debtagh.
    Nov 2017 CC1 £3329 CC2 £600

    Debt Free Nov 2019: earlier if I have my way
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 5th Dec 17, 6:33 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Remember to keep debt busting balanced, if you have loads of outings planned then cancelling some seems sensible, if not and you cancel everything you may get resentful of it.

    Some people might not agree and say no fun until it's all paid off but I couldn't do that. Maybe look at the crowd going , do you really want to go out with them , if not cancel .

    Have a good day debtagh.
    Originally posted by Cumbria lass
    Thanks, itís funny you say that as they actually arenít proper friends. I donít want to be rude but we only know each other through past baby classes and meet up every so often with the kids but literally a handful of times a year. I just donít want them to think Iím funny if I cancel but likewise Iíll be really annoyed if I go and I feel itís rubbish. Due to mental health issues Iím not really enjoying things as much esp with ppl I barely know. I have other nice things with my family that Iím looking forward to.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • Cumbria lass
    • By Cumbria lass 5th Dec 17, 7:33 AM
    • 884 Posts
    • 4,512 Thanks
    Cumbria lass
    There is your answer then . Better to spend time with people who are friends rather than acquaintances .
    Nov 2017 CC1 £3329 CC2 £600

    Debt Free Nov 2019: earlier if I have my way
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 5th Dec 17, 2:22 PM
    • 4,827 Posts
    • 9,110 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    I think you are doing so well. I agree with CL in that you have to live a bit but maybe really only go to things you know you will have a good time at. At this time of year there is usually lots going on but not all get togethers are worth paying out a lot for. The £20s all add up so cancelling a few are saving you quite a lot and reserve your time and money for real friends rather than just people you know and are not likely to see again on a regular basis. I don't think anyone would think you are funny if you cancel as there is lots going on this time of year.
    2 weeks to go until early retirement in December . Debt free and mortgage free.

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 6th Dec 17, 6:36 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Morning,

    So if all goes well by the end of the week I would have managed to move some debt that is coming off 0% to 4.9% for 36 months and put some on 0% until July 2019. Whilst I know doing balance transfers isnít ideal , I saw it as a better option than paying 16.9% Apr. They now make you pay the one off fee in your next statement rather than add it to the credit card which is good. It means deals ending next year will be just under £7.5k worth of debt rather than the over £20k like it was going to be. The idea ( all being well )is for this to get cleared. Once all the transfers are done I might update my signature to include individual debt.

    I have a full days work today which should bring in £85 at the end of Jan. I still havenít been food shopping in over a week and a half but really need to.

    Have a good frugal day everyone.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
    • enthusiasticsaver
    • By enthusiasticsaver 6th Dec 17, 6:45 AM
    • 4,827 Posts
    • 9,110 Thanks
    enthusiasticsaver
    Doing balance transfers is ok as long as the deals are relatively long and you actually clear them so I do think you did the right thing in moving it considering the expensive interest you would be paying and the relatively high balances. Doing balance transfers and only paying very small minimums is self defeating. Paying the fee rather than adding it to the debt is also good. Have a good day.
    2 weeks to go until early retirement in December . Debt free and mortgage free.

    I'm a Board Guide on the Debt-Free Wannabe, Mortgages, Banking and Budgeting boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Any views are mine and not the official line of moneysavingexpert.com. Pease remember, board guides don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com
    • debtaghh
    • By debtaghh 6th Dec 17, 8:41 AM
    • 848 Posts
    • 2,356 Thanks
    debtaghh
    Because I have to pay the transfer fees in Dec it means Iíll be short so am having to use the money I allocated for January. Iím not going to stress about it as things change all the time. Worse case I do have some savings that I can use.
    Debt 16th October 2017: Cc £49,987- family £37,561: total debt £87549

    Current debt: Cc £47, 520 , Family £ 37,288 total debt £84,808
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