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  • FIRST POST
    • poorlittlefish
    • By poorlittlefish 20th Jul 16, 8:32 PM
    • 330Posts
    • 324Thanks
    poorlittlefish
    Finding the dating game so harsh!
    • #1
    • 20th Jul 16, 8:32 PM
    Finding the dating game so harsh! 20th Jul 16 at 8:32 PM
    To cut a very long story short I met a guy on a dating site last year, we had a wonderful few months then he almost became a different person overnight and messed me about for another few months until I finally decided I was worth more than the crumbs he was feeding me and ended it.

    I joined Match on friends' advice and rejoined PoF. I don't know what's happened to online dating over the past year but boy, am I finding it harsh this time around! Men I find attractive and make contact with rarely reply, which makes me feel a bit rubbish. The two that did reply both asked me on dates, but one stood me up and the other blocked me before we finalised arrangements. Guys who contact me either abruptly disappear (presumably because they've had a better offer) or provisionally arrange dates then also disappear or just block me!

    For instance, last Friday I'd agreed to go on a date on the Sunday. I asked if he had any suggestions for where to meet and offered one of my own. I turned my phone on the next morning to find he'd blocked me. I could understand if I'd said something offensive or was coming on strong, but I hadn't!

    Am I just having a run of exceptionally bad luck or do others have this kind of experience?!
Page 6
    • caprikid1
    • By caprikid1 10th Oct 16, 11:49 AM
    • 304 Posts
    • 340 Thanks
    caprikid1
    Strange
    I have been single on and off for a couple of years, certainly not gods gift and as a dad who has his children a lot with a busy job sometimes quite restrictive.


    I tend to message quite a few people and if a conversation goes ok arrange to meet up.


    Never been stood up, had two serious relationships (Now on the second) and made a few friends I am still in touch with.


    I think in terms of men


    1. Undateables
    2. Married
    3. Liars / Serial Daters
    4. Decent - Won't be around for long.


    A lot of women don't rush into meeting and have met a few that have not been on a date for 12 months.


    Women
    1. Inaccurate photos / description (Really whats the point).
    2. Not seeking a relationship
    3. Seriously fussy (1 date in 12 months).
    4. Undatable - Crazy
    5. Decent - Won't be around for long.


    Don't take it serious, be sensible, stay safe and enjoy the richness that is meeting new people. I loved every moment of online dating.
    • beckysbobbles1
    • By beckysbobbles1 10th Oct 16, 4:19 PM
    • 250 Posts
    • 338 Thanks
    beckysbobbles1
    Internet dating sucks!!!


    I tried in back in 2012 and it was fine. Guys were nice, not too many weirdos and had a few dates but when I went back on it, it had completely changed!!


    I had so many people stalk me when I didn't reply and then when you reply politely saying you're not interested, you get a load of abuse.


    I was always quite open to meeting up. I never really say the first meet as a date. More a quick coffee or drink to see if you 'click' and can hold a conversation. I'd say only 1 in 10 meets went on to a second date.


    People hide behind computers and pretend to be something they are not. I wish it was easier for people to meet new people but we are all obsessed with our gadgets that we don't even make eye contact with strangers.
    • chanda
    • By chanda 10th Oct 16, 8:26 PM
    • 33 Posts
    • 26 Thanks
    chanda
    I've been single for over 5 years now, I'm thinking about online dating but it scares me.

    I'm 24 by the way (female)

    I've heard about Tinder which I'm gonna try next month.

    I always generally attract guys who only want sex because I've got big boobs, I'm also tall and slim too.

    But I'm not at all familiar with POF, is it similar to Match.com?
    Determined to live the best life! 😃 😍 🌏 🎉 🎆 🎈

    Paid off all my Debt! 07.10.16. Savings £300.00/£5000.00 £4700.00 left
    • pimento
    • By pimento 10th Oct 16, 9:06 PM
    • 5,012 Posts
    • 6,495 Thanks
    pimento
    I've been single for almost a year now and am enjoying the time to myself. I do wonder how easy it will be to meet a lady - especially with me being very carful with money.

    would any ladies out there be happy to eat reduced price food everyday? How about going for a walk in the park rather than spending money on a dinner date? Any frugal ladies are welcome over here!

    I think i'm too busy saving up for a house/retirement than looking for a partner. If the right person came along i would of course go for it.

    I'm also against meeting people online or via apps - i don't think you can get your personality across online. Keep at it and don't let the few guys who mess you around get to you. I think most guys would see it as a game and wouldn't even think the person on the other side has feelings!
    Originally posted by superpauk
    I could put up with a lot of things but parsimony isn't one of them. It's on a par with keeping your socks on in bed.
    "If you think it's expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur." -- Red Adair
    • powerful_Rogue
    • By powerful_Rogue 10th Oct 16, 9:23 PM
    • 2,745 Posts
    • 3,949 Thanks
    powerful_Rogue
    Became single in May 2015.

    Signed upto POF, OKCupid & Tinder. Met a lot of women and had a lot of fun. In November met "The One" and shes currently in the process of moving in.

    Always amazed me the stories women told me about men on these sites. The missus was offered £100 just to kick a man in the balls in POF!

    Just a case of weeding the no hopers out.
    • bundly
    • By bundly 12th Nov 16, 1:18 PM
    • 914 Posts
    • 783 Thanks
    bundly
    I have tried in the past to find someone this way, with mixed results.

    99% of the people on a site won't suit you, so you have to be persistent.

    The best advice I can give is to BE RUTHLESS. You will be led up the garden path many times by men who live 500 miles away but insist that distance is no object when two people are right for one another, but never can meet up due to time and expense. Big timewaster!

    Ignore anyone still living with his ex.

    Ignore anyone who won't send you photos of himself.
    • smudger1964
    • By smudger1964 17th Nov 16, 2:55 PM
    • 609 Posts
    • 241 Thanks
    smudger1964
    I have been using online dating for a few years on and off met some lovely girls on there and tbh some very strange ones..
    If only everyone used recent pictures like I do it would be so much better..
    I met one lady in Costa last year didnt even recognise her from the "recent pictures" she had put on the dating site..
    The trick is to get a phone number fairly quickly then have a chat on the phone not message on the site for weeks as it quickly becomes tedious..

    Then just meet for a quick coffee or a drink the first date doesnt need to be a marathon unless you get on so well that you want it to go on longer..You soon know if you have an attraction or not
    And remember not all blokes are after one thing,so much better to get to know someone for a while first before you get down to all that stuff
    Last edited by smudger1964; 17-11-2016 at 3:03 PM.
    • Oakdene
    • By Oakdene 17th Nov 16, 3:10 PM
    • 501 Posts
    • 678 Thanks
    Oakdene
    Given up on dating for now. I never, until earlier this year, understood those people who said they had met 'the one' & they just knew. My partner & I separated but for me she is/was the one who I cant move on from no matter what I try.
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