Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • Waves and Smiles
    • By Waves and Smiles 17th Mar 16, 5:23 PM
    • 5,105Posts
    • 21,576Thanks
    Waves and Smiles
    Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3
    • #1
    • 17th Mar 16, 5:23 PM
    Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3 17th Mar 16 at 5:23 PM
    This thread is a continuation of The Mental Health thread “Here we can all be heard for a little while Part 2”. The previous thread can be found here-

    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5320917&page=501

    I started the original thread when I was lonely and suffering with mental health issues and was lucky to find a wonderful group of amazing new friends who now mean the world to me. My name was Worried and Scared back then but with the help of everyone here I became Waves and Smiles. This thread is no longer just about me, it is about all of us and for anyone who needs mental health support, their carers and anyone who is interested in learning more. Sometimes we speak seriously, sometimes we offer gentle advice and a lot of the time we laugh together. Sometimes I write mini-novels about my experiences of living with complex mental illness. What is important is everyone here is there for each other. New posters are welcome to join in, or just lurk (we call them humming birds because they hover!) if they would prefer. This is a place without judgement or pressure, and a safe place for everyone. We try to keep abbreviations to a minimum but if there are some that you do not understand please ask.

    Sir Pugliet is our Good Mental Health pug! You may notice that he is mentioned from time to time, he is a little cuddly pug toy that was sent to me by a friend on the thread. He is something of a celebrity now!


    Hugs and warm handshakes, or finger squishes, whichever you prefer.

    Also, please take a look at the following links which offer great advice written by the lovely people at MSE!

    http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/news/family/2016/03/martin-lewis-launches-new-money--mental-health-policy-institute

    http://blog.moneysavingexpert.com/2016/05/16/the-money-and-mental-health-policy-institute-whatll-it-really-do

    http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/credit-cards/mental-health-guide
    Last edited by Waves and Smiles; 17-05-2016 at 10:29 AM.
    Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened - Anatole France

    If I knew that the world would end tomorrow, I would still plant apple trees today - Martin Luther King
Page 453
    • elsien
    • By elsien 18th Jul 17, 10:22 PM
    • 15,419 Posts
    • 38,709 Thanks
    elsien
    Good luck, knock 'em dead.

    HBS when do you start your new job?

    I gave up on comps Calley - wins stopped and I decided I should do something more constructive with my time. Which tbh generally involves spending too much time on here instead of whatever I should be doing.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
    • Gingernutty
    • By Gingernutty 18th Jul 17, 11:32 PM
    • 3,465 Posts
    • 10,439 Thanks
    Gingernutty
    Thanks.
    Don't know what I'm doing, but doing it anyway...
    • Izadora
    • By Izadora 19th Jul 17, 11:26 AM
    • 1,464 Posts
    • 4,201 Thanks
    Izadora
    Good luck Gingernutty!
    • dandy-candy
    • By dandy-candy 19th Jul 17, 11:55 AM
    • 1,727 Posts
    • 8,988 Thanks
    dandy-candy
    Good luck for today gingernutty

    I'm having a wobbly. DH will be home in an hour or so for us to go away and I'm breaking out in a sweat, feeling sick, shaky, you name it. I know it is utterly ridiculous- we're only going 2 1/2 hours up the road! - but my head is telling me again and again that I can't do it we've only booked the hotel for one night, DH wants to stretch it to 4 nights as we have a different hotel booked for Saturday night but I said we'll see how it goes. I think I'd rather come home inbetween but I can't tell him it's that I'm afraid I will not cope because if I say that he will get all grouchy and ignore me which makes it a thousand times worse.

    I'm trying to pack everything I can think that will help me cope, pills for all possible needs, my knitting, a book, my favourite biscuits and some boiled sweets, even a de-stress essential oil to sniff. I will have my tablet to look up things to visit and watch movies if need be.

    Any tips or advice that might help please?
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 19th Jul 17, 12:11 PM
    • 31,050 Posts
    • 114,391 Thanks
    Pyxis
    Good luck for today gingernutty

    I'm having a wobbly. DH will be home in an hour or so for us to go away and I'm breaking out in a sweat, feeling sick, shaky, you name it. I know it is utterly ridiculous- we're only going 2 1/2 hours up the road! - but my head is telling me again and again that I can't do it we've only booked the hotel for one night, DH wants to stretch it to 4 nights as we have a different hotel booked for Saturday night but I said we'll see how it goes. I think I'd rather come home inbetween but I can't tell him it's that I'm afraid I will not cope because if I say that he will get all grouchy and ignore me which makes it a thousand times worse.

    I'm trying to pack everything I can think that will help me cope, pills for all possible needs, my knitting, a book, my favourite biscuits and some boiled sweets, even a de-stress essential oil to sniff. I will have my tablet to look up things to visit and watch movies if need be.

    Any tips or advice that might help please?
    Originally posted by dandy-candy
    Can you promise yourself a reward or treat if you make it through the first night?
    Then you could also up the reward/treat for each subsequent night, that you might manage.

    Also, can you look at their menus online, and see what you really fancy?

    Also, can you order dinner and/or breakfast in the hotel room, to make it seem less daunting?

    Take some luxury smellies, to have a pamper bath while you're there. Assuming there is a bath and not just a shower!
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom
    Founder Member: WIMPS ANONYMOUS
    • heartbreak_star
    • By heartbreak_star 19th Jul 17, 3:17 PM
    • 7,610 Posts
    • 16,788 Thanks
    heartbreak_star
    Hello all! Started new job Monday, everyone is fab but my head is in overload atm haha!

    Good luck GN!

    Elsien - oh Gitdog is such a cutie

    Hope everyone is well

    HBS x
    I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another.

    #JC4PM
    • dandy-candy
    • By dandy-candy 19th Jul 17, 7:06 PM
    • 1,727 Posts
    • 8,988 Thanks
    dandy-candy
    Thanks for the ideas Pyxis we've arrived and it's a very nice room and staff friendly. There's a flea market tomorrow so I'm promising myself a little pressie tomorrow as suggested!
    We had a walk around the town and there looks like some interesting shops to explore and I picked up a leaflet on local attractions. If tonight goes ok then there would be plenty to see if we stay on so fingers crossed it all goes ok!
    I've already realised I forgot to pack a nightie but DH has offered me one of his t shirts to sleep in. I said only if it's a clean one and not the one he's wearing
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 19th Jul 17, 7:11 PM
    • 31,050 Posts
    • 114,391 Thanks
    Pyxis
    Thanks for the ideas Pyxis we've arrived and it's a very nice room and staff friendly. There's a flea market tomorrow so I'm promising myself a little pressie tomorrow as suggested!
    We had a walk around the town and there looks like some interesting shops to explore and I picked up a leaflet on local attractions. If tonight goes ok then there would be plenty to see if we stay on so fingers crossed it all goes ok!
    I've already realised I forgot to pack a nightie but DH has offered me one of his t shirts to sleep in. I said only if it's a clean one and not the one he's wearing
    Originally posted by dandy-candy
    Yey! You got there!
    That's the biggest hurdle over!
    It's all a doddle from now on....... just doing whatever takes your fancy!

    If you do feel a bit overwhelmed, just pop back to the hotel room for a bit of standby-mode time! And while in standby-mode, think of what your next treat will be!
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom
    Founder Member: WIMPS ANONYMOUS
    • xXMessedUpXx
    • By xXMessedUpXx 20th Jul 17, 2:50 AM
    • 17,051 Posts
    • 44,827 Thanks
    xXMessedUpXx
    Saw doctor today. Told me i need to stay on my mood stabiliser, but need to male sure i split dose it, morning and night. Said he would speak to a psychiatrist about my meds. Left a voucemail saying he;s left info that might be helpful with reception. I'm crashing. It feels bad. I was so so up and now i feel like i've rock bottom. This is what they want though. Cant get help till im in crisis. well here i am, in crisis. thats what they wanted thats what they get. they could have helped me before getting to this point but they didn't. so here i am. havemt got my pip renwal sorted because i've been up all week and i blocked it out. cannot deal with the stress of that on top of how im feeling. im so frustrated. why the hell can i not get help? doctor told me to have someone around me wh0o can look after me but i'm st mine monday to friday cos swain has work early on weekdays and i dont finish till 10pm so too late to go to his. I don;t know what to do. If i'm still feeling like this tomorrow !!!! it i;m calling 111.
    "Life Is Like A Beautiful Melody Only The Lyrics Are Messed Up"
    To see the rainbow you need both the sun and the rain to make its colours appear
    weight lost: 1lbs
    • Gingernutty
    • By Gingernutty 20th Jul 17, 8:30 AM
    • 3,465 Posts
    • 10,439 Thanks
    Gingernutty
    Hey MU.

    Sorry to see you're still not well.

    I doubt they wanted you to feel so bad, they just need you to come down off your high and reach a stable state.

    You were feeling fabulous while you were high and delayed calling for help, it's a stupid system.

    The system waits for us to call for help, even though we have definite diagnoses of pretty serious illnesses.

    It would make more sense if we had more check ups at GP and psychiatrist level in order to ascertain progress, moods and stability.

    Please take care of yourself.

    In other news, I'll hear tomorrow afternoon about the job.
    Don't know what I'm doing, but doing it anyway...
    • elsien
    • By elsien 20th Jul 17, 8:55 AM
    • 15,419 Posts
    • 38,709 Thanks
    elsien
    MU call 111 if you need to, that's what it's there for.
    I'm sorry you're feeling so bad at the moment. Can swain call DWP for you and let them know you're unwell? They can't give him any information but they will log the call for future reference to explain any delays.

    GN fingers crossed for good news for you today.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
    • mellymoo74
    • By mellymoo74 20th Jul 17, 11:15 AM
    • 5,684 Posts
    • 13,036 Thanks
    mellymoo74
    MU if you are comfortable with it you can get SWAIN to be your appointed person with the DWP.
    I do it for OH
    You don't need to be married
    Money can still go into your account
    Xxx
    • Gingernutty
    • By Gingernutty 20th Jul 17, 6:37 PM
    • 3,465 Posts
    • 10,439 Thanks
    Gingernutty
    I left work, hooked onto the bus' wifi and checked my emails.

    BEFORE THEY'VE EVEN FINISHED INTERVIEWING FOR THE ROLE, they've rejected me.

    They've got more interviews tomorrow.

    I'm gutted and feel like a complete failure.

    I can't even get a job doing what I used to do.
    Don't know what I'm doing, but doing it anyway...
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 20th Jul 17, 8:12 PM
    • 31,050 Posts
    • 114,391 Thanks
    Pyxis
    I left work, hooked onto the bus' wifi and checked my emails.

    BEFORE THEY'VE EVEN FINISHED INTERVIEWING FOR THE ROLE, they've rejected me.

    They've got more interviews tomorrow.

    I'm gutted and feel like a complete failure.

    I can't even get a job doing what I used to do.
    Originally posted by Gingernutty
    What a shame, Gingernutty. I'm so sorry.

    I wonder if they felt it was a come-down for you, despite you saying you wanted less responsibility?
    I do find it hard to understand why employers can't accept that sometimes people do just want to take a step back, and not keep charging up the prospects ladder.

    But one door closes and another opens.
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom
    Founder Member: WIMPS ANONYMOUS
    • Gingernutty
    • By Gingernutty 20th Jul 17, 8:35 PM
    • 3,465 Posts
    • 10,439 Thanks
    Gingernutty
    This door has closed and the temp position I'm in has been offered to someone who starts at the end of the month.

    Looks like I'll be resting soon.
    Don't know what I'm doing, but doing it anyway...
    • Izadora
    • By Izadora 21st Jul 17, 2:30 PM
    • 1,464 Posts
    • 4,201 Thanks
    Izadora
    Sorry you didn't get the job but at least there's a positive
    Looks like I'll be resting soon.
    Originally posted by Gingernutty
    For the first time in what seems like forever I've got a weekend where I'm not staying away from home or dealing with house guests!!
    The only downside is that IzHe's going to his friend's birthday tomorrow (I already had plans with the girls so have had to miss it) so will be staying there and he's been doing so much overtime this week that I feel like I've barely seen him. On the plus side, I get to have a Buffy marathon on Sunday morning without the annoying commentary
    • Gingernutty
    • By Gingernutty 22nd Jul 17, 1:43 AM
    • 3,465 Posts
    • 10,439 Thanks
    Gingernutty
    Feedback: I didn't expand on the answers and there were candidates with more recent/current experience.

    So my experience was too long ago and I didn't waffle.
    Don't know what I'm doing, but doing it anyway...
    • dandy-candy
    • By dandy-candy 22nd Jul 17, 5:28 PM
    • 1,727 Posts
    • 8,988 Thanks
    dandy-candy
    MU - I hope you are doing ok. Did you need to call 911?

    Gingernutty - sorry interview didn't go your way, are you registered with lots of employment agencies? If not is that something worth doing?

    I'm still away! The first hotel was nice so stretched it to two nights and then didn't seem worth driving back in between. Last night we stayed in a different place that was "ok". Tonight we are in a B&B which seems ok so far. I'm a bit stressed because when I booked I paid by PayPal and had it confirmed. When we arrived the guy showed us to the room and said we pay in the morning. I said I'm sure I've paid in full and he said it just a holding charge, I was sure it wasn't but didn't like to speak up. After he left I checked online and both my PayPal and the booking website says I've paid in full. DH says that's no problem just tell the guy tomorrow morning but I'm getting stressed because what if he says it isn't I know that sounds daft as I have it in writing but I always get afraid of confrontation and not being believed.

    Anyway I hope you all are doing ok, hugs if anyone needs them x
    • xXMessedUpXx
    • By xXMessedUpXx 25th Jul 17, 4:14 PM
    • 17,051 Posts
    • 44,827 Thanks
    xXMessedUpXx
    Ended up not calling them, survived till my GP appointment. I've been told to come off my anti depressant as they think thats what was contributing to the mania. Been off it a week and not feeling too great. Was told to restart it if i find my mood going south. And to book another appointment, and they'd try again for the mental health team referal. Got my PIP form filled in and sent off, now to see if i get called for an asessment, thankfully the charity who helped with my form can accompany me so i wont be on my own if it does happen.

    Back to being on budget this week. Last week was a bit of an impulsive mess so today i took all the cash out i need for the week and my debt card is going in the drawer so i can;t use it. Managed to go swimming twice last week and going again tonight, so at least thats something positive from the manic episode.
    "Life Is Like A Beautiful Melody Only The Lyrics Are Messed Up"
    To see the rainbow you need both the sun and the rain to make its colours appear
    weight lost: 1lbs
    • jobbingmusician
    • By jobbingmusician 25th Jul 17, 11:57 PM
    • 18,827 Posts
    • 19,143 Thanks
    jobbingmusician
    Sooo glad to hear you feeling better, MU. Now all we need is WaS...

    (All you need is WaS.....) Hope you're lurking, hun! <3
    I'm the Board Guide on the Matched Betting; Referrers and Jobseeking & Training boards. I'm a volunteer to help the boards run smoothly, and I can move and merge posts there. Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.

    The good folk of the matched betting board are now (I hope!) supporting Macmillan, in memory of Fifigrace. Visit
    https://www.gofundme.com/running-the-leeds-10k-for-macmillan
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

912Posts Today

6,262Users online

Martin's Twitter
  • RT @SF_England: @MartinSLewis Thanks Martin, just so everyone is aware- check your payslips between when you graduated and the following Ap?

  • Sorry to bubble burst. But each day a lot of people tweet me this. I think it doesn't show any other votes until t? https://t.co/uRny62NRc1

  • Today's Twitter poll: I want to find out are people generally happy. So how happy are you today? PS I did the same? https://t.co/3Gw9ylu2H2

  • Follow Martin