Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 25th Jan 16, 3:39 PM
    • 672Posts
    • 1,404Thanks
    reality_check
    Reality Check...
    • #1
    • 25th Jan 16, 3:39 PM
    Reality Check... 25th Jan 16 at 3:39 PM
    I need to start writing this diary while I have the motivation to do so! I have been a lurker for a while and reading all the diaries inspire me and I always think "I wish I could sort out my debt" well....today is the day!

    I have buried my head in the sand for too long and it really is time to get a reality check!

    I have done a quick total of my current debt and it is as follows:

    Credit cards: £9817.86 of a possible £13300
    Overdraft: £1857.77 of a possible £2500
    Student loan: £11600.85
    Loan from family memeber: £7000
    Mortgage: £68213.30

    Total: £98489.78!!

    Credit cards and overdrafts are my main priororty, student loan is automatically deducted from my wages and family loan doens't need paid back ASAP, but would rather get that paid sooner rather than later.

    I live with my daughter and 2 dogs, I will list my incomings and outgoings later today....I have tried to cut back to the bare essentials, but a lot of my recent debt has come from renovating my house and generally living beyond my means and going a bit OTT at christmas!

    I am hoping this diary will help hold me accountable for my spendings and get me on the right path to living debt free!!

    Fingers crossed!! xxx
Page 32
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 20th Apr 17, 2:02 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Also, I should mention that my parents house that was bought when I was with my ex husband is for our kids. It was always bought in the intention of splitting the money with our son and daughter. God knows what happens when you throw another baby into the mix....this was never meant to happen with someone else! Sounds like a right old mess!!
    • monz
    • By monz 21st Apr 17, 11:51 AM
    • 2,792 Posts
    • 7,961 Thanks
    monz
    Aww really Louby, how awful!!

    Maybe I do have rose tinted glasses on right now...

    Another option was buying a property together, but....I love that I have a low mortgage not sure I want to start paying high mortgage payments on a big house that we don't really need....I love my house!

    Both the houses he has were his grandparents and Dad's ex council so he too was in a position to buy them cheap and now owened outright and worth about £200,000 in total...so it does seem pretty even....the new one will just be a standard buy to let with a 25% deposit.

    Maybe we should go see solicotors to protect ourselves... I just don't think it is romantic or a good way to start a relationship, but I could end up in a bad position. Trying to think what would I tell a friend to do.....but I really don't kno what my answer would be!!
    Originally posted by reality_check
    Check maybe with a solicitor only to keep you covered. I know I am pretty anti man but I have been screwed over somany times I dont want you hurt or things been taken off which is yours so just ensure youre safe xx
    Debt (1/9/14) £6,702.11 Debt free (30/11/2016)
    house deposit £5,971.23/10,000
    mums xmas vouchers boots 50/50 sisters xmas vouchers topshop 30/30 Dads xmas voucher amazon (surveys) 0/30 (£15 pending)
    holiday - £237.81/1064.72
    Australia 2019 - /5000
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 21st Apr 17, 10:22 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Thanks Monz, it's something we should both look into.... will bring it up next week as OH is currently away to Prague on a stag weekend.

    Yoga was good, will def be going back. Hopefully the more I go the more it will make me nice and calm and love everyone because today was a day that everything and everyone was p!$$ing me off!! Thank god it's Friday and work is over with, has been such a looooong week!! I then came home and my daughter was driving me up the wall but she's away to her bfs for the night so it's just me and the dog!

    Went for dinner with a friend, was £25 and a waste of money. Nice company and catch up, but food wasn't up to much. Also spent £40 on the dogs hair cut, but that was all budgeted for and he is smelling and looking great!

    I've just ran a bath with some Laura Mercier Creme Brûle for a treat, and my house smells amazing!! Going to have a bath, face mask, slap on some fake tan, do my nails and watch some Kardashians - all of that with a cup of tea and some chocolate will put me in a good mood!

    Spending tomorrow at home, cleaning, ironing, washing windows etc and not sure what else. Will be glad of a weekend doing nothing!! Hope everyone has a more exciting weekend planned than I do! xx
    Last edited by reality_check; 21-04-2017 at 10:35 PM.
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 21st Apr 17, 10:24 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    p.s £85 spent on food in Sainsburys last night, to save me going tomorrow will do next 7-10 days and £20 spent in home bargains on toilet roll, bleach, diluting juice and bottles of water x
    • Verbatim
    • By Verbatim 22nd Apr 17, 7:50 AM
    • 4,501 Posts
    • 13,088 Thanks
    Verbatim
    You said in an earlier post that you didn't think you'd be together if you hadn't been pregnant. This rang alarm bells for me and would make me extra cautious about keeping everything in separate names. You don't need a joint account which would make you financially linked. You could just decide how much your joint life together costs and split the money in whatever way seems fair with him paying the agreed sum into your account by so each month.
    CCs @0% £24k Dec 05 £19,621.41 Au £13400 S 12600 Oct £11,981 £9481 £7500 Nov £7250 D £7100 Jan 6950 F £5800 Mar£5400 May £4830 June £4660 July £4460 Aug £3200, S £900, £0 18/9/07 DFW Nerd 042
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 22nd Apr 17, 10:53 AM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    I meant that because he is still young and always wanted kids and I don’t think I could deny someone that. He did say what would be would be and wouldn’t be put off being together if it didn’t happen, but I just don’t think I could have. We decided to try for a baby, and given past experience I thought would take a few years if it was to happen, not happen in month 1 of trying!!

    I think until my debt is clear we should keep finances separate. Then once I have paid it off we can maybe combine? I’ll need to mention this to him when he is back. Keep our own mortgages for now and combine food/utilities?

    xx
    • Verbatim
    • By Verbatim 22nd Apr 17, 6:42 PM
    • 4,501 Posts
    • 13,088 Thanks
    Verbatim
    Even combining utilities will make you financially linked I believe.
    Congrats on the baby by the way!
    CCs @0% £24k Dec 05 £19,621.41 Au £13400 S 12600 Oct £11,981 £9481 £7500 Nov £7250 D £7100 Jan 6950 F £5800 Mar£5400 May £4830 June £4660 July £4460 Aug £3200, S £900, £0 18/9/07 DFW Nerd 042
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 23rd Apr 17, 11:01 AM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Thanks! and will maybe look into all the other stuff too.

    Ended up going to see Ed Sheeran in Manchster last night, he was so so good!! I was designated driver, managed to last the pace and went out after it for a few drinks so never woke up until after half 10 this morning and feel totally refreshed!

    Finding out this week about possible bonus in next months pay, fingers crossed!! xxx
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 25th Apr 17, 7:34 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    I thought I was getting zero commission, but turns out some of the days I was in either end of being off fall into this commission period, some days off were holidays so get an average commission for these and with the back dated pay rise/quarterly bonus I should have an extra (aprox) £1,700 next month after tax…a lot better than nothing that's for sure!!

    I am hoping to use £1,000 for debt, and £700 for some baby stuff and spending money for Portugal.

    I have also decided to use the £600 that I saved for debt, I want to tackle credit cards as much as possible before August...

    That's the plan for today anyway - as usual it is subject to change lol xxx
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 26th Apr 17, 8:15 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Went for a free 20 minute facial in Clarins today! Not sure if this is a national offer or just with the one by me....

    Anyway, was so good!! I then signed up for another one that's normally £25 for 40 minutes but was 10% off and its buy 1, bring a friend....soooo I am taking my sister and getting her to sign up for it too, £12.50 for a Clarins facial is an absolute bargain!

    The girl was so lovely and gave me loads of free samples!! I was debating to buy a new moisturiser and she gave me 6 samples of 5mls each so 25 ml and a full pot is 50ml... going to give it a go and see how I get on.

    There is NO pressure or obligation to sign up for a paying one, so if it's an offer on your local Clarins counter and something you would like you should all go get one!

    xxx

    p.s if you don't like facials, you can either get 20 minute back and shoulder massage or 20 minute arm and hand x
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 27th Apr 17, 9:48 AM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Ok so I have since spent £115 on the Clarins website this morning - what is wrong with me!!

    Bought some eye cream, toner and oil to help with stretch marks.

    I also really need to buy some new bras! Don't think can hold of much longer, I look like I've had a boob job!! Don't want to spend loads, but underwear is always pricey!! xxx
    • AspiringButAnxious
    • By AspiringButAnxious 27th Apr 17, 1:54 PM
    • 613 Posts
    • 2,484 Thanks
    AspiringButAnxious
    Wow, this is what happens when I don't check in for a while! Congratulations
    Rainy day fund — 580/500 Emergency fund — 1009/1000
    Loan — 0/20,000 = 0% Fun fund: £10 Credit card balance — £0
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 29th Apr 17, 6:35 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Lol thanks ABA, don't check for a while and then suddenly I am 5 months pregnant

    Was asleep last night before half 8!! So been up since 5am!! Got all the housework done first thing and then was at the shops with my daughter today. Shopping on a Saturday afternoon is horrendous!! But we had a nice little day, and she bought me lunch (a Subway, had been dreaming about one for days!). I took a few things back I had had since Christmas that I bought DS and I never returned them, so just pretended I had forgot my receipt and was able to exchange in store and got myself 2 pairs of trainers. Was in Sports Direct and had to pick there and then so was £90 on 2 pairs of trainers, but I plan on getting this baby weight off by walking for miles when he/she gets here.

    Spent £9 in an Asian supermarket which got me 3 MASSIVE chicken breast for £4.78 - I am very funny about chicken but they have passed the look and smell test so far, will see if they pass the taste test later...and if they do I might start going there, far better than the pumped up water filled supermarket chicken. Also some fresh chillies and extra hot dried chillies, coriander, garlic & ginger paste, massive bit of ginger and some onions. I feel I got a lot for my money! OH has a few friends over later to watch the boxing, so I am going to have a bath, face mask and chill out in bed nice and early. Changed my bedding and you can't beat fresh bed sheets! I am about to go iron them and get them on, this is what Saturday nights are made of, can't wait!

    My sister brought round a box of 12 crispy creme doughnuts as they had some deal on and she bought 3 boxes?! So will be having 1, maybe 2 later with a cup of tea in bed - I've already claimed the nutella one!

    Oh I also spent £16 on one of those water bottles that you infuse with fruit etc...probably could have shopped about online and got it cheaper but I wanted it there and then after the facial lady told me my skin is dehydrated and I need to be drinking 8 a day!!

    All my friends who have had babies recently swear by the Sleepyhead Delux pods so might just bite the bullet and pop one on the credit card, but they are about £120ish so not cheap. These things weren't around 20 years ago when I had my daughter, but I remember sleepless nights oh so well, so anything that help a baby sleep is priceless, yes?! I have asked and all my friends have got rid of theirs, which is annoying as would have used one of them rather than shelling out on a new one.

    Better go check on this curry, hope everyone is enjoying the long weekend xxx
    Last edited by reality_check; 29-04-2017 at 6:47 PM.
    • monz
    • By monz 2nd May 17, 10:43 AM
    • 2,792 Posts
    • 7,961 Thanks
    monz
    ohhh the chicken sounds lovely!!!
    Debt (1/9/14) £6,702.11 Debt free (30/11/2016)
    house deposit £5,971.23/10,000
    mums xmas vouchers boots 50/50 sisters xmas vouchers topshop 30/30 Dads xmas voucher amazon (surveys) 0/30 (£15 pending)
    holiday - £237.81/1064.72
    Australia 2019 - /5000
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 2nd May 17, 1:24 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Turns out it wasn't!! It was rubbery and really put me off. Everyone else liked it, but it won't be getting bought again. Reminded me of the chewy chicken Tesco sell...yuck! The only chicken I trust is Lidl, def won't be deviating again!! xx
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 3rd May 17, 9:23 AM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    £130.58 due to Scottish Power that I need to pay – will use credit card…(I’ve still not sent it to his new home of living with my mum and dad). I was in credit of £252 I think so had a bill nearly £400.00 is this expensive for 3 months?!I think it is but not sure.I may have paid energy bills for the past 17 years but last 4 years been on this awful tariff and years before I never looked so don’t have a clue.

    TODAY I AM SWITICHING PROVIDERS!! This is my task today, that is LONG overdue!!
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 7th May 17, 11:23 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Had a spendy weekend...spent roughly £250 on artificial plants for the garden. I have been wanting some for so long, but was wary of online because really wanted to see how fake they looked... anyway, I found some in saindburys and they are perfect! Also bought some cute fairy lights and little signs to hang up. I already have artificial grass that I put in when I moved in, so after this I should't need to buy plans ever again!!

    Also, who said Aldi is cheap?! Or is it just me that buys the wrong things.... I was £69 today and I got, 1 medium chicken (free range so not the cheapest) mince, smoked salmon (small 100g pack), prawns, smoked mackerel, sausages, bacon, bag of frozen tuna steaks to try about £10 worth of fruit, £5 worth of veg, £15 worth of stuff for my mum, milk, cleaning wipes and bleach, few tins of tomatoes and I honestly can't remember what else but think that was it! I know it is cheaper than some places but I think would have been about £35 in Lidl! My Lidl that I go to is closed for 6 weeks so been shopping at the new Aldi that has opened but think I will stick to the extra drive for another Lidl.

    I shouldn't even have been shopping I am mean to be using food from the freezer/cupboards but we really wanted a roast today, but that was another spend onto the credit card.

    I have another week until pay day (and no money in any of the pots) and probably need about £10 worth of petrol to last me until then, and apart from that I am going to try my hardest not to buy anything so I can sort my life out again and look at my debt and see whats what!

    Oh no just as I've typed that I realised I need to buy one of those sheets you put at the bottom of the oven to keep it clean and protect it and I also need to buy some oven enamel paint because I was cleaning the oven last night with that oven pride and this morning when I was cleaning it off I noticed it had got on a little bit of the door and scraped it off!! Would drive me insane if I don't fix it!!

    I've just got out the bath and about to go get into fresh bedding, my marine has drove up to Scotland tonight as is working away this week so I was left to put the bedding on, it's a blinking work out in itself! Monday again tomorrow but at least it's a 4 day week for me!! xxx
    Last edited by reality_check; 07-05-2017 at 11:26 PM.
    • Eager_Elephant
    • By Eager_Elephant 8th May 17, 6:58 AM
    • 4,107 Posts
    • 22,134 Thanks
    Eager_Elephant
    Oh reality I love you!!!

    Could you announce for the next month you will just spend what you want? I noticed that each time you announce you are going to try really hard to pay off debt and hide the credit card or give to your parents you seem to spend loads of money that month.

    Is it a form of self-sabotage??
    I'm not a psychologist but would be interesting to read up on it?

    Good luck with surviving the next week!!!
    Ninja Saving Turtle No. 33 for October
    NSD - 0/18
    (up to 01/10/17)
    My Diary is here - http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=2175629 (Eager Elephants Effective Everyday Excursion)
    • monz
    • By monz 8th May 17, 10:36 AM
    • 2,792 Posts
    • 7,961 Thanks
    monz
    Oh reality I love you!!!

    Could you announce for the next month you will just spend what you want? I noticed that each time you announce you are going to try really hard to pay off debt and hide the credit card or give to your parents you seem to spend loads of money that month.

    Is it a form of self-sabotage??
    I'm not a psychologist but would be interesting to read up on it?

    Good luck with surviving the next week!!!
    Originally posted by Eager_Elephant
    Is it just me or do you find this post quite rude!?

    Take no notice! You are doing amazing <3
    Debt (1/9/14) £6,702.11 Debt free (30/11/2016)
    house deposit £5,971.23/10,000
    mums xmas vouchers boots 50/50 sisters xmas vouchers topshop 30/30 Dads xmas voucher amazon (surveys) 0/30 (£15 pending)
    holiday - £237.81/1064.72
    Australia 2019 - /5000
    • reality_check
    • By reality_check 8th May 17, 2:54 PM
    • 672 Posts
    • 1,404 Thanks
    reality_check
    Haha tell me about it, but I don’t think I can tell myself just to spend what I want in risk of actually following through!!

    Aww Monz don’t worry I def wasn’t offended, takes a lot more than that (even though I didn’t find it offensive) to get to me but thanks x

    In other news, OH has just txted me to say his brother is now moving his wedding from December to August...21 days after my due date!! Who changes their wedding date so late on!! It is in Brighton, where loads of hotels are booked or VERY expensive!! Let’s hope I’m not overdue!!
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

1,623Posts Today

7,315Users online

Martin's Twitter