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    • safehouse
    • By safehouse 25th May 15, 7:13 PM
    • 698Posts
    • 1,877Thanks
    one day at a time
    • #1
    • 25th May 15, 7:13 PM
    one day at a time 25th May 15 at 7:13 PM
    I am a 48 year old mother of one DS, I have a mortgage of 100,000 on my little bungalow and a few other debts CC etc of approx 5,000 or less..................
    We have a wonderful DS. We have a quite successful business (for now anyway)………
    My OH is a functioning alcoholic, (there I said it), too look at him you would never know, and probably never believe it. When sober there isn't a better man walking, he is a hard worker, kind, considerate and a fantastic father. When he drinks, which is most evenings he can be all of the opposite. Don't get me wrong we do sometimes still have good days, especially when OH is on the wagon, but many more bad than good....
    I have been trying now for years to help my OH with his problem, his health has suffered but he refuses to stop. Xmas 2015 gave me the strength to take a massive step backwards, I am exhausted with it him mentally and physically, not to mention the affect this was having on my DS.
    OH can only help himself, it is not my duty and it has taken me a long time for me to accept this, but I finally have................I am now putting myself and my rock my DS first.
    Future protection in mind, I have been saving without his knowledge now for roughly 10 years scrimping with the intention of paying off our mortgage "My life the last 10 years have given me a terrible fear of being homeless to the point of constant nightmares".....To my amazement I have managed to secretly save £63,550 to date....(69,140 updated 19th November 2016)
    These are my reasons for wanting to pay my mortgage off as quickly as possible, I have no idea how long my OH will manage to carryon working or how much longer before our little business will crumble or how long the relationship will take the strain, I just know by focusing on saving for our future and my little house I get back a sense of control which helps get me through each week.
    I also have a diary to help keep me in check when tempted to spend and a place to throw out my emotions when I feel like I am falling backwards…………………

    DS 270…. CC 3,950 …. Mortgage £100,000 /£63,550/72,420 paid £36,450/27,580 remaining….Xmas Hols £0
    Last edited by safehouse; 03-05-2017 at 8:33 PM.
Page 46
    • safehouse
    • By safehouse 30th Jun 17, 6:06 PM
    • 698 Posts
    • 1,877 Thanks
    Weekend here and instead of dreading OH antics I am looking forward to Carbooty on Sunday.
    Sold bag for a fab £45 on Teabay only cost me £5 on carbooty so heck of a result .
    DS has been accepted for 2nd choice at university and interview for first..........fantastic news as he has a back up now if 1st choice doesn't suit, or falls second hurdle student finance and harder hill to climb! ....fingers crossed.
    Wish the rain would stop now, need to get some washing done and refuse to use tumble dryer ....
    Tea time....tummy's a rumbling made a lovely cottage pie and veg yummy x
    • safehouse
    • By safehouse 5th Jul 17, 3:49 PM
    • 698 Posts
    • 1,877 Thanks
    Funny few days but in a good way. OH on his best behavior and very happy....which is very unsettling for me, maybe he has seen the light Lol
    Best news Student finance have agreed to support DS new degree.............has interview on Friday for 1st choice ...
    Business very busy meaning savings doing just as well........managed a massive £650 into mortgage this morning when 3 customers not only paid their invoices early but in full .
    Selling on Teabay seems to have gone quiet, but cant complain.
    Need to do food shop but trying to get though as many days as I can by raiding the freezer.
    Finally stopped raining so walkie time for mollymoo ...must say nice to write such a positive post for a change Lol x
    Also have OH daughter from past relationship visiting this evening and staying for a few days.....shes a little gem so looking forward to seeing her

    mortgage 72,370/27,630
    Last edited by safehouse; 05-07-2017 at 4:14 PM.
    • please-let-me-be-lucky
    • By please-let-me-be-lucky 9th Jul 17, 9:26 PM
    • 8,023 Posts
    • 44,212 Thanks
    Hope you've continued to have a good few days Xx
    Debts @ LBM £23,729.31. Debts @ 08/04/2016 £0

    NSDs achieved in July - 1/5
    Lbs lost - 9
    • safehouse
    • By safehouse 11th Jul 17, 8:21 AM
    • 698 Posts
    • 1,877 Thanks
    Thanks Lucky.but unfortunately the usual problem has reared its ugly head literally! normally does after a quiet calm period, also his daughter has just gone home, its as if he was waiting for her to go.
    OH stayed off work yesterday, no reasoning to it, just fell off the wagon again, now we have a string of very annoyed customers .... everyone's mood has taken a complete nose dive as a result and house is like a freezer at the moment.
    My DS was talking about retirement the other day and it got me thinking about OH retiring I cant get the thought/dread out of my mind live every day like yesterday makes me feel physically sick.
    These are the days that are given as a reminder...... I should carry on with my secret saving and every penny possible.
    Some good news.... my DS has been accepted for student finance for University although over shadowed again by OH pure selfishness.
    Sorry for the moan everyone feeling very low this morning..........xx

    • maddiemay
    • By maddiemay 11th Jul 17, 10:55 AM
    • 2,931 Posts
    • 25,477 Thanks
    Sending virtual hugs. Great news about your D's though. Try and keep focused on stashing the cash, that will be the key for your future when the time is right.
    • safehouse
    • By safehouse 15th Jul 17, 9:48 AM
    • 698 Posts
    • 1,877 Thanks
    Thankyou Maddiemay x
    Things have settled down again.......but for how long I do not know?
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