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  • FIRST POST
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 4th Nov 14, 12:03 PM
    • 463Posts
    • 1,144Thanks
    AleMrsT
    Mini meltdown and light bulb moment
    • #1
    • 4th Nov 14, 12:03 PM
    Mini meltdown and light bulb moment 4th Nov 14 at 12:03 PM
    Hi everyone,
    I posted on the forum yesterday and after some soul searching, I have contacted Step Change and am now in the initial stages of sorting a Debt Management Plan. The guy was really helpful, and said I am definitely taking the right steps for the circumstances, and I need to put me first.
    To get it all out in the open and off my chest is going to be the second box ticked on my 'getting my life on track' checklist.
    Number one was admitting that I cannot do this any more. I can't work full time any more, and I can't carry on getting in debt to pay debt.
    With my health deteriorating, I knew I needed to do something, but knew too that I just could not afford part time wages.
    I've figured it out so that I can reduce my hours by one day a week, meaning less sick days overall, so not too much of a pay reduction, but still less money than I need to service my debts with the increasing interest.
    So, Step Change are putting me on Debt Management Plan, it will take me a long time to pay it all off, but least it will be manageable, affordable and I wont have any more mini meltdowns.

    The next step is to have a big chat with the OH, which is the part I'm looking forward to the least. I married him knowing he has an IVA, and that he has 'around £15000' of debt, but I have no idea about anything else, when it will be paid off, how much he's paying, etc, so I want us to sit and have an open chat about the complete bigger picture, so that we can really start to get to grips with everything. I also want to encourage him to embrace being more frugal, I have really tried, I've saved on food shopping by cooking from scratch, with using up what we have, and selling things on ebay to raise money for Christmas, but he's bought a coffee machine, sofa cushions and a wii U, which has thoroughly CHEESED ME OFF. So, a big chat is needed there. (to be fair, I agreed to the Wii U, he had a bonus from work and we have sold the Wii).
    I already feel a bit better, I'm off to Barclays this afternoon to set up a 'basic cash card account' so that I can transfer my PayPal funds and start my (long) debt free journey.
    I will try and update here when I can, but figures as at today are (taken off my Noddle credit report, not called for accurate balances from bank or CC company):
    Loan £2176
    OD £1050 (this is my OD limit, no idea how far into it I am, I daren't look!)
    N CC £2389
    H CC £1971
    TOTAL £7586.

    I am so looking forward to having a bank account without a negative balance!!
    Last edited by AleMrsT; 06-11-2014 at 10:26 PM.
Page 20
    • misstara
    • By misstara 5th Oct 16, 4:37 PM
    • 1,900 Posts
    • 12,550 Thanks
    misstara
    Good luck
    Debt at LBM Jan 2014 £10458.09 Now £485.11 (95.4% paid)
    New flat debt Nov 2016 £1252.44
    Mini Targets
    Exercise target - 2/12. Groceries target £25.59/£135. NSD target 4/15.
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 5th Oct 16, 5:16 PM
    • 463 Posts
    • 1,144 Thanks
    AleMrsT
    Woo hoo I got the job! Start in 4 weeks, got to hand my notice in on Monday. I'm so excited. It's definitely the right decision to take this job, I was no way near as happy or enthusiastic about the hospital job.
    Debt @ LBM Nov 2014 = £7586.85
    DEBT AT START OF DMP JAN 2015 £7202.85 now £5468.26
    NCC £2060.00/£2414.66 HCC £1677.87/£1973.50 LOAN £932.06/£1759.69 OVERDRAFT £798.33/£1055
    General savings for Christmas/holidays etc £100.07/£500
    Furniture £950/PAID
    • misstara
    • By misstara 5th Oct 16, 10:56 PM
    • 1,900 Posts
    • 12,550 Thanks
    misstara
    Congratulations fab news
    Debt at LBM Jan 2014 £10458.09 Now £485.11 (95.4% paid)
    New flat debt Nov 2016 £1252.44
    Mini Targets
    Exercise target - 2/12. Groceries target £25.59/£135. NSD target 4/15.
    • twiggy86
    • By twiggy86 10th Oct 16, 3:53 PM
    • 1,246 Posts
    • 6,230 Thanks
    twiggy86
    Well done on the new job AleMrsT!!!
    LBM 16.10.14 - TOTAL - £9,863.64 - now £1,344.82
    LBM2 10.10.16 - TOTAL - £5,224.87- now £4,890.88
    £1,000 EF #31 - £438.40/£1,000
    Pay off by xmas 2015 £6,329.96/£5,000
    Pay off by xmas 2016 £613.14/£1,957.96
    Mortgage overpayments 2015 - £500, 2016 - £1,000
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 11th Oct 16, 9:20 AM
    • 463 Posts
    • 1,144 Thanks
    AleMrsT
    I got the offer letter for my new job emailed to me on Friday so I handed my notice in on Friday afternoon. Friday was a really tough day for everyone, especially the managers, and I topped it off at 5pm by handing my notice in! Ha!
    Because I'm going to a competitor I've had to be put on garden leave, even though they need me there to finish my work and hand stuff over. So on Friday I had my pc switched off and had to hand my work over with no time to go through any of it with them to explain where I'm at with things or how to do x, y and z! I spent the last half an hour cleaning the kitchen and clearing my desk. I wasn't the least bit upset to be leaving, I couldn't stop smiling!
    The rest of the staff were a bit shocked and commented 'what are we going to do if you're not here?!' Ah well!

    I start my new job on 1st November so can enjoy 3 weeks off at home which I wasn't expecting but I'm looking forward to.

    Day two of garden leave today, think I'm going to clean the house and make an apple crumble to have as pudding tonight.
    Last edited by AleMrsT; 11-10-2016 at 9:27 AM.
    Debt @ LBM Nov 2014 = £7586.85
    DEBT AT START OF DMP JAN 2015 £7202.85 now £5468.26
    NCC £2060.00/£2414.66 HCC £1677.87/£1973.50 LOAN £932.06/£1759.69 OVERDRAFT £798.33/£1055
    General savings for Christmas/holidays etc £100.07/£500
    Furniture £950/PAID
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 15th Oct 16, 12:07 PM
    • 463 Posts
    • 1,144 Thanks
    AleMrsT
    Enjoyed my first week of garden leave, the house is spotlessly clean!

    Off out with my mum and grandma today, not sure where we're going but other half is at work until 3pm, then its an evening in as usual.

    I've started writing a meal plan again, it is so much easier when you plan! We have salmon and rice tonight with peppers and spring onions, then we'll probably finish watching Luke Cage on Netflix, we love the Marvel stuff.

    We've spent so much money on groceries this month, £117 in morrisons and £20 in B&M just this week! But, we are fully stocked up with meat, freezer stuff, toiletries, washing powder etc, and we also bought some storage boxes for the kitchen as we had to have the built in fridge taken out as it wasnt working properly, and I have bought a new cushion for the lounge as the seam had split on one of them so I had to throw it away.

    Now I'm back on track with meal planning, and I still have Wednesdays off with my new job, we've decided to do our grocery shopping online, as morrisons do cheap midweek deliveries, which is perfect. Going to spend some time making a 'list' online of regular purchases so that it makes it easier when to do the shopping when we need to.

    I also returned some shoes that OH bought a couple of weeks ago, typical man behaviour, he didnt try them on before he bought them, wore them once for work and realised they hurt his feet so theyve been sitting in the wardrobe for 3 weeks.

    It cost me £4 in bus fare in to town and back to return them, but better than wasting £45 by not returning them.

    I have also finished buying birthday stuff for my other half, its his birthday next week so I have got him a T shirt he wanted, and used a cineworld voucher that I got through TCB to book tickets to see Dr Strange at Imax, so it only cost £17!
    I've booked us a meal at his favourite restaurant too, but the money for that is in my savings account and is budgeted for so pleased with all of that!

    I have also finished the christmas shopping things for my niece, and I have bought the baby a little something for christmas although she will only be 8 weeks old.

    Got a busy week next week, I'm in London on Tuesday for a hospital appointment, its a super early start as we have to be there at 10.10am! We will drive and park at Stanmore for £5, so reasonably cheap day.
    Then I've got a hair cut next Wednesday, again I have the money aside for this, I transfer money to my savings account once I book the appointment, its much easier than cancelling because I don't have the money, and I enjoy the treat!
    Seeing my friend on Wednesday night, haven't seen her in months so that will be nice.
    Then Thursday is OH's birthday and I've got things planned for that, then its Friday again and a week left of garden leave!
    It's going far too fast, but I'm looking forward to starting my new job!
    Debt @ LBM Nov 2014 = £7586.85
    DEBT AT START OF DMP JAN 2015 £7202.85 now £5468.26
    NCC £2060.00/£2414.66 HCC £1677.87/£1973.50 LOAN £932.06/£1759.69 OVERDRAFT £798.33/£1055
    General savings for Christmas/holidays etc £100.07/£500
    Furniture £950/PAID
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 24th Oct 16, 9:29 AM
    • 463 Posts
    • 1,144 Thanks
    AleMrsT
    Haven't posted for a few days so thought it was time for an update.

    It was my husbands birthday on Thursday so he had the day off, I took him to his favourite restaurant then we found a really cool bar that has just opened, so we had a really enjoyable evening. I had put the money aside for the meal in my savings account so was all in budget too
    We're off to the cinema on Tuesday for the final part of his birthday present, I managed to use a voucher that I got through TCB for part of the cost so I only had to pay for one ticket instead of two

    He's at work all week this week with the weekend off, I did all of the cleaning and ironing yesterday and I nipped in to town in the morning to go to Lush to get myself some bath treats so I can pamper myself this week on my last week off. Think today I'm going to visit my grandma then come home and clean the windows inside seeing as the window cleaner has been and done the outsides, then go through the freezer and write the meal plan for this week. We should have enough food in that i can write the plan based on what we have without having to factor in any trips to the shop.

    Something else I need to do today is chase up my manager at the my old job about my payslip. Had my payslip through on Friday and it states that I'll be getting paid £441, with no explanation as to why. Not once was I told that garden leave wouldnt be full pay, and neither of the letters I've had or the payslip mention any deductions. The manager was off last week so I'm pretty sure her first day back today will be super busy, but the deadline for raising payroll queries is 12noon on pay day, which is tomorrow, otherwise it rolls over to next month, and employees cant raise queries themselves, it has to go through a manager. I'm going to call later on today to make sure she's received my email and is going to look into it. The amount on my payslip doesnt even cover our rent, I'll be at least £450 out of pocket!

    Luckily my husband gets his bonus this month so we should be ok covering my share of the bills if it isnt sorted straight away, however we were planning to use his bonus to put towards the credit card that is accruing interest, which we wont be able to do now which makes me mad.
    Debt @ LBM Nov 2014 = £7586.85
    DEBT AT START OF DMP JAN 2015 £7202.85 now £5468.26
    NCC £2060.00/£2414.66 HCC £1677.87/£1973.50 LOAN £932.06/£1759.69 OVERDRAFT £798.33/£1055
    General savings for Christmas/holidays etc £100.07/£500
    Furniture £950/PAID
    • misstara
    • By misstara 25th Oct 16, 7:57 PM
    • 1,900 Posts
    • 12,550 Thanks
    misstara
    £441 hope you got it sorted.
    Debt at LBM Jan 2014 £10458.09 Now £485.11 (95.4% paid)
    New flat debt Nov 2016 £1252.44
    Mini Targets
    Exercise target - 2/12. Groceries target £25.59/£135. NSD target 4/15.
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 26th Oct 16, 9:12 AM
    • 463 Posts
    • 1,144 Thanks
    AleMrsT
    £441 hope you got it sorted.
    Originally posted by misstara
    Thanks misstara. She emailed me on Monday to say she'd queried it with payroll, then payroll replied within the hour to say they had me down as an October leaver instead of November, and they've actioned the correction straight away, the rest of my wages should go in tomorrow. I've had a revised payslip and it is the full months wage, not even a deduction for my hospital absence

    I had to cancel the standing order that goes to the bills account in case it wasnt sorted, but once the rest of the money goes in tomorrow I can make a manual payment to the bills account, and it means OH can use his bonus for the CC as originally intended.

    It was a big sign of relief when the revised payslip came through.

    Yesterday was a NSD for me, but was a spendy day for OH. I spent the day cleaning the windows and making a meal plan, and not much else. Then when OH got back from work I had a nice soak in the bath and we went out to the cinema which was the last of his birthday present.

    OH suggested we eat out and make an evening of it instead of cooking at home, so we went to a really quirky bar and had food and cocktails, it was amazing! One of the best meals I've had in a long time. Then at the cinema OH cannot resist the pick and mix, and I had a drink and a small popcorn (£5!!).

    Today I'm waiting for the estate agent to come round to inspect the house, she'll be here for less than 5 minutes and all is fine, so I'm just catching up on diaries whilst I wait. Hopefully she'll be here before 10am as I'm off to my sisters today. She doesnt like being on her own at the moment, she's 39 weeks pregnant and baby could come any day now, so shes worried she'll go in to labour when shes on her own with my two year old niece, although how much help she thinks I'm going to be I have no idea!
    Debt @ LBM Nov 2014 = £7586.85
    DEBT AT START OF DMP JAN 2015 £7202.85 now £5468.26
    NCC £2060.00/£2414.66 HCC £1677.87/£1973.50 LOAN £932.06/£1759.69 OVERDRAFT £798.33/£1055
    General savings for Christmas/holidays etc £100.07/£500
    Furniture £950/PAID
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 21st Nov 16, 7:58 PM
    • 463 Posts
    • 1,144 Thanks
    AleMrsT
    I haven't updated this for ages, again! I'm so rubbish.

    My sister gave birth the day after my last post, so I'm an auntie again they're both doing really well, and my 2 year old niece is in love with her baby sister already.

    OH and I are taking the eldest niece out for the day next Monday to give my sister a break at home with the newborn, as its hard work now her husband is back at work.

    I've started my new job, been there around 2 and half weeks now, I'm really enjoying it, and definitely like getting home before 6pm each day, leaving work half an hour early has made a huge difference to the day, mainly because everyone is out of the door at dead on half 5 or a couple of minutes before some days, whereas we didnt start actually clearing away until 6pm at the old place, so it was always 10 minutes later that you're actually leaving the office.

    I've had my last payslip for my old job, because they paid on 25th each month I've got about £330 to be paid from 26th October to 4th November, then I'll get a full months pay for my new job on the last day of the month, so the 'extra' £330 will come in handy for christmas presents and additional December expenses.

    In not so MSE friendly news, I've booked a refresher driving lesson, as although I've had a license for 13 years, I haven't even sat in the driver seat of the new car that we got in July, and my OH wont let me use it, even though I'm paying towards it as he's worried about my driving. So I've decided to have a couple of refresher lessons to improve my driving and my confidence, hopefully the instructor will reassure me that I'm not terrible or dangerous and then OH will have no reason not to let me use the car! If he doesnt let me use it after my lessons, I've decided I'm cancelling my half of the car payment.
    I don't see why I should pay my bus fare, and pay towards a car that I don't get to use. He claims that I get use of it because he takes me and drops me off to places, but I don't want a chauffeur, I want some independence. This has all stemmed from me telling him I was going to be late to get somewhere, again, and him moaning that he's always having to run to other peoples time schedules. I got mad at him and just blurted that he wouldnt have to if he let me use 'our' car.

    I've just got to a stage where I feel completely dependent, to get anywhere I have to get picked up, dropped off or spend loads on bus fare and spend ages on public transport when the car is sitting, unused, on his work car park. Especially on my days off midweek or in the evenings when he's on a late shift, I am just stuck at home. I could go and see my friends, (who I rarely see because they live in different towns and I have to rely on them to pick me up etc) or go for a swim, or go into the city and have a look around, or even do the grocery shopping!

    I've been feeling a bit 'stuck in a rut' for a while now, and have realised its because I have absolutely no independence so I feel isolated and fed up. I'm looking forward to seeing how it goes, its £48 per two hour lesson, and the instructor has said he is happy to take me out in our car too so that I at least get to test drive it 'safely'.

    I don't really have anything else to update so I'm going to catch up on diaries then get on with some ironing.
    Last edited by AleMrsT; 21-11-2016 at 8:02 PM.
    Debt @ LBM Nov 2014 = £7586.85
    DEBT AT START OF DMP JAN 2015 £7202.85 now £5468.26
    NCC £2060.00/£2414.66 HCC £1677.87/£1973.50 LOAN £932.06/£1759.69 OVERDRAFT £798.33/£1055
    General savings for Christmas/holidays etc £100.07/£500
    Furniture £950/PAID
    • AleMrsT
    • By AleMrsT 2nd Dec 16, 8:16 PM
    • 463 Posts
    • 1,144 Thanks
    AleMrsT
    Just a quick post this evening as I have some ironing to do before I settle down on the sofa to finish my book (I swear I'm always ironing when I post here!)

    I had my driving lesson, it went well and he pointed out the main concerns and explained why my husband probably isnt comfortable with my driving. I have another lesson booked for next week, so fingers crossed that goes ok. I also have my hair appointment next week too, so thats a lot of money to pay out on one day (£48 for driving, £67 for hair), luckily I still have some money saved so its all good.

    I got the final pay from my old job, which I spent on christmas presents so that i could leave money in my savings account for hair and driving. I now have everything, including my sisters birthday present. I just have to think of something to get my grandma and grandad but other than that I'm all done! I've spent a lot more than I have in previous years, but this year I've saved and luckily got two lots of pay in November so its worked quite well. Definitely going to save again for next year, it makes it so much easier.

    I have one meal out planned before christmas with my friends, so will also have to put some money aside for that, but otherwise I have nothing else to pay for for the rest of December. Inevitably something will crop up so I'm going to have as many NSD's as possible and keep the funds going as long as possible.
    Last edited by AleMrsT; 02-12-2016 at 8:19 PM.
    Debt @ LBM Nov 2014 = £7586.85
    DEBT AT START OF DMP JAN 2015 £7202.85 now £5468.26
    NCC £2060.00/£2414.66 HCC £1677.87/£1973.50 LOAN £932.06/£1759.69 OVERDRAFT £798.33/£1055
    General savings for Christmas/holidays etc £100.07/£500
    Furniture £950/PAID
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