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    • Karmacat
    • By Karmacat 16th Jan 14, 7:37 PM
    • 27,736Posts
    • 151,598Thanks
    Karmacat
    Breaking Through, Travelling On
    • #1
    • 16th Jan 14, 7:37 PM
    Breaking Through, Travelling On 16th Jan 14 at 7:37 PM
    Hello

    I think a few people on this board know me already, from the dfw board

    I really need the focus of an mse diary - debts are all paid off, except for about 40% of a French mortgage - but income has been declining, and is currently pitiful. And without a diary, I've lost focus on getting the best deal for the things I *do* need to spend out on, like insurance, and Christmas train tickets, that sort of stuff. So I've come back properly after pootling about on other people's threads, and on general threads too, to be fair

    The focus is so that I can replace lost income - so that I can have a holiday of my choosing, for instance - and stopping digging into my savings for ordinary living expenses would be nice too Its also so that I can get my pension up beyond "miserable penury" - its kind of urgent, as under the system that lasted till about 15 years ago, I'd be retiring at the end of this year But I'm not, sadly. The aim is to retire in July 2016, when my younger sister retires, with a reasonable pension.

    One complication in earning more is that between arthritis, energy issues and the need to stay available to what clients I have, I can't / don't want to, take a second job. So more income has to be through other work - patchwork, portfolio, call it what you like (I know I do ).
    Retired August 2016
Page 300
    • greent
    • By greent 11th Jul 17, 8:53 PM
    • 6,207 Posts
    • 62,884 Thanks
    greent
    Aww, Kc - sorry to hear you've taken a backwards step at the mo with health . Hopefully you'll be back climbing forwards again soon xx
    I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul
    Repaid mtge early (orig 11/25) Bal 01/09 £124616 01/10 £104927 01/11 £89873 01/12 £76317 01/13 £52546 01/14 £35356 01/15 £12133 07/15 £NIL
    Next: BTL Mtge 12/16 £69786. 2017 OPs (#18) £4151/£3286
    Net sales 2017 £1152.39/£500 PAYDOX17 £11333/£10k Decluttered 1515/2017 items
    • muddywhitechicken
    • By muddywhitechicken 11th Jul 17, 9:00 PM
    • 3,709 Posts
    • 33,979 Thanks
    muddywhitechicken
    A big hug from me too KC - hope you feel better soon.
    MWCx
    Mortgage at highest (April 2008): ~£195,000
    Outstanding balance: ~£42,000
    Current total overpayments: ~£116,250
    • Fortune Smiles
    • By Fortune Smiles 12th Jul 17, 6:41 AM
    • 2,531 Posts
    • 20,826 Thanks
    Fortune Smiles


    Fortune x
    Mortgage: 0.94% paid House Deposit Contribution: 72%

    All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us - J R R Tolkein
    • themadvix
    • By themadvix 12th Jul 17, 10:02 AM
    • 1,029 Posts
    • 5,441 Thanks
    themadvix
    Hugs from me too KC. I know I'm guilty of filtering my posts - not intentionally, but they certainly miss out the bleurgh feeling I often have.

    Hope you're feeling better today - take it **very** gently!!
    OPs 2017 = £2603/£10000
    S&S ISA = £300/£600
    OPs made 2016 = £6142.12
    Starting balance 2012: £132000; balance June 2017: £99,974
    MFW2017 no. 38
    • Suffolk lass
    • By Suffolk lass 12th Jul 17, 10:11 AM
    • 1,476 Posts
    • 16,885 Thanks
    Suffolk lass
    You must listen to your body KC, especially if you are ill. Take care of yourself xx
    MFiT T4 #2 update 31.2% after Q6
    Save £12k in 2017 #64 - £8112.39 saved (73.74%) after August - my annual target is £11,000
    OS Grocery Challenge 2017 budget of £3,600 £3000 (reduced from Apr) - 61.61/66.66% including stores after July
    My DFD is http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5593594
    • earthgirl
    • By earthgirl 12th Jul 17, 10:19 PM
    • 2,408 Posts
    • 19,454 Thanks
    earthgirl
    I get annoyed with myself sometimes for wasting time and I sometimes mention it, but really I just mention it and then talk about what I'm needing to do. It's my way of getting myself back to it, but I think it gives a unbalanced impression too.

    Hope you get plenty of rest and feel better very soon.

    You make my life fuller and I love to see your comments.

    Big hugs
    15/5/12 Paid off Mortgage 1 (£220k) Dec 13 - £116,508 Bought Dream House Dec 14 - £94, 402 (£22,106 offset in 2014) Jan 16 - £67, 852 (£26,550 offset in 2015) Dec 16 - £33,529 ( £34,323offset in 2016)
    Jan 17 - £39, 773 (Re-estimation of endowments )
    June 17 £32,053 Sept 17 £22,619
    Kids savings 13,578/36k
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 12th Jul 17, 10:27 PM
    • 47,244 Posts
    • 169,868 Thanks
    beanielou
    Take care of you.
    Baby steps
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • earthgirl
    • By earthgirl 14th Jul 17, 7:14 PM
    • 2,408 Posts
    • 19,454 Thanks
    earthgirl
    Hope all is well karma x
    15/5/12 Paid off Mortgage 1 (£220k) Dec 13 - £116,508 Bought Dream House Dec 14 - £94, 402 (£22,106 offset in 2014) Jan 16 - £67, 852 (£26,550 offset in 2015) Dec 16 - £33,529 ( £34,323offset in 2016)
    Jan 17 - £39, 773 (Re-estimation of endowments )
    June 17 £32,053 Sept 17 £22,619
    Kids savings 13,578/36k
    • EatingTheElephant
    • By EatingTheElephant 14th Jul 17, 7:45 PM
    • 1,105 Posts
    • 5,962 Thanks
    EatingTheElephant
    Thinking of you Karma, hope all is well.
    • ZTD
    • By ZTD 15th Jul 17, 4:41 PM
    • 23,094 Posts
    • 39,741 Thanks
    ZTD
    I'm only productive first thing in the morning, madvix - see below
    Originally posted by Karmacat
    You should always count your blessings - I'm not productive at any time...

    Turns out I was finished for the day when I replied yesterday another 3 hours in bed, feeling awful. I try to be positive, but I've obviously been ignoring the effects of being ill, completely so, on here.

    So, this is what I *don't* do any more, because I feel so ill:
    edit: there were 20 items in this part of the post, I deleted them, too much to see at once.
    .....

    I get really, really bored with such an empty life, and when I do something (because I can do things, even some of the things above, for 15 - 30 minutes or so) I'm exhausted, sometimes for days. The current, severe fatigue attack came on because I went on a gentle country walk with my sister. We walked slow, we drank water, we sat and rested. And still it's knocked me out for 3 weeks now. It's very upsetting.
    Originally posted by Karmacat
    Well that's the thing. You need to try to take the emotion out of it. It happens, not something you can do anything about - so:


    It doesn't matter how much you rail against the fairness or otherwise of it, it's not going to change. All you need to do is accept that if you want to do A, you will need B time to do it, and C time to recover. Don't get upset at C - every day has its night.

    The alternative is "pacing" which the medical professionals love, but which I've found to be nonsense so palpable, you can cut it with a knife.

    I try to focus on the positives, but that doesn't mean the negatives aren't there, and I'm maybe giving a false impression of my life, it seems as though its getting a bit out of balance. Sorry for that, but I need to redress it.
    Originally posted by Karmacat
    "Follow the money!" - Deepthroat (AKA William Mark Felt Sr - Associate Director of the FBI)
    "We were born and raised in a summer haze." Adele 'Someone like you.'
    "Blowing your mind, 'cause you know what you'll find, when you're looking for things in the sky."
    OMD 'Julia's Song'
    • rtandon27
    • By rtandon27 15th Jul 17, 6:51 PM
    • 1,965 Posts
    • 12,028 Thanks
    rtandon27
    Hey KC - how's things with you???
    Mine/Hers: May 2011£10835.33May 2016£4709.46Oct 2016£0
    Not Mine/His: June 2016£8175.38Oct 2016£0
    Grand Total£0
    PSST - WE ARE DEBT FREE!!! (24 OCT 2016)
    (With heartfelt thanks to those who have gone before us & their indubitable generosity.)
    • carbootcrazy
    • By carbootcrazy 16th Jul 17, 10:19 AM
    • 4,085 Posts
    • 22,932 Thanks
    carbootcrazy
    You should always count your blessings - I'm not productive at any time...



    Well that's the thing. You need to try to take the emotion out of it. It happens, not something you can do anything about - so:


    It doesn't matter how much you rail against the fairness or otherwise of it, it's not going to change. All you need to do is accept that if you want to do A, you will need B time to do it, and C time to recover. Don't get upset at C - every day has its night.

    The alternative is "pacing" which the medical professionals love, but which I've found to be nonsense so palpable, you can cut it with a knife.



    Originally posted by ZTD
    What a lovely post, ZTD. Wise words as ever and something valuable for every one of us to reflect on.

    KC, sending positivity and hugs your way. Take care
    Make £10 A Day Challenge 2017. Jan-Aug: £4112.05 Sept: £139.86
    3-6 Months Emergency Fund Challenge #12: £3733.00/£5000.

    Original Debt: £56804 (@ LBM 02/13). Balance now: £15841
    . Getting there
    • Karmacat
    • By Karmacat 16th Jul 17, 11:31 AM
    • 27,736 Posts
    • 151,598 Thanks
    Karmacat
    Me again (oops) (you are wonderful ...)

    Thank you all so much. My backward steps were indeed backward - interesting to know, though, that other people sense that imbalance about their own posts, thank you for that. At the moment, I'm just getting by, not doing anything I don't absolutely have to do. That includes walking for 15 minutes - doing nothing is as bad as doing too much. The priority, though, has to be driving to see my very ill rellie next week, my sister's picking me up and driving me door to door, so I'll be fine.

    After that, the priority is doing stuff to get me back on my feet. Thats a balance of sleep, antihistamines, vits b d and k, probiotics, limiting dairy and upping green leafy, minimal exercise, hydration, low carb, visualisations, meditation, and the gratitude prayer.

    Thats all I can think of right now. Suggestions below gratefully considered, but I'm not online till this next week. Thank you again, all of you.
    Retired August 2016
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 16th Jul 17, 12:37 PM
    • 47,244 Posts
    • 169,868 Thanks
    beanielou
    Great post Z.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • Karmacat
    • By Karmacat 17th Jul 17, 9:27 AM
    • 27,736 Posts
    • 151,598 Thanks
    Karmacat
    It doesn't matter how much you rail against the fairness or otherwise of it, it's not going to change. All you need to do is accept that if you want to do A, you will need B time to do it, and C time to recover. Don't get upset at C - every day has its night.
    Originally posted by ZTD
    This has been itching at me, so I just needed to pop back to get some closure.


    Totally agree, really, except that to fully accept, you first need to explore and acknowledge exactly what it is you're accepting, and with such a hazy, still-badly-researched illness, that takes some time.


    Save
    Retired August 2016
    • earthgirl
    • By earthgirl 17th Jul 17, 7:19 PM
    • 2,408 Posts
    • 19,454 Thanks
    earthgirl
    Great to hear your ok, and wow to all those "looking after yourself" ideas. Think most people should be doing a lot of those. Good luck
    15/5/12 Paid off Mortgage 1 (£220k) Dec 13 - £116,508 Bought Dream House Dec 14 - £94, 402 (£22,106 offset in 2014) Jan 16 - £67, 852 (£26,550 offset in 2015) Dec 16 - £33,529 ( £34,323offset in 2016)
    Jan 17 - £39, 773 (Re-estimation of endowments )
    June 17 £32,053 Sept 17 £22,619
    Kids savings 13,578/36k
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 17th Jul 17, 9:10 PM
    • 47,244 Posts
    • 169,868 Thanks
    beanielou
    This has been itching at me, so I just needed to pop back to get some closure.


    Totally agree, really, except that to fully accept, you first need to explore and acknowledge exactly what it is you're accepting, and with such a hazy, still-badly-researched illness, that takes some time.


    Save
    Originally posted by Karmacat
    I still struggle with this one.
    It is hard.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • ZTD
    • By ZTD 17th Jul 17, 9:26 PM
    • 23,094 Posts
    • 39,741 Thanks
    ZTD
    This has been itching at me, so I just needed to pop back to get some closure.
    Originally posted by Karmacat
    Oops - you needing closure was not the intention.

    Totally agree, really, except that to fully accept, you first need to explore and acknowledge exactly what it is you're accepting, and with such a hazy, still-badly-researched illness, that takes some time.
    Originally posted by Karmacat
    It does, and I've been at this for about 12 years now, and I've been through all the bollox that the medical profession has come up with such as the pacing, the graded exercise and CBT. (just some examples...)

    Essentially, I found that if you carefully pace yourself and shy away from "overexerting" yourself, you end up doing less and less until you do nothing.

    So what I found works best for me, is to nurture my spoons and wait until I feeling my best (in relative terms), then do high priority jobs and cheerfully accept the crash-and-burn that comes afterwards.

    This leads to things like a couple of Fridays ago, where, while doing a physically demanding job, I puked at a customer's site, had to lie on their floor to recover for five minutes, and ended up spending the weekend in bed. Do I have an adverse emotional reaction to that? No. Would I do it again? Yes. Why? Because it was a high enough priority to make it worth it.

    Getting upset at (yet another) wasted weekend would change nothing.

    That's fatigue from my point of view.
    Last edited by ZTD; 17-07-2017 at 9:29 PM.
    "Follow the money!" - Deepthroat (AKA William Mark Felt Sr - Associate Director of the FBI)
    "We were born and raised in a summer haze." Adele 'Someone like you.'
    "Blowing your mind, 'cause you know what you'll find, when you're looking for things in the sky."
    OMD 'Julia's Song'
    • themadvix
    • By themadvix 19th Jul 17, 7:38 AM
    • 1,029 Posts
    • 5,441 Thanks
    themadvix
    Afraid I don't have anything to add to the above discussion, but just wanted to say I'm thinking of you KC and I hope the looking after yourself pays off x
    OPs 2017 = £2603/£10000
    S&S ISA = £300/£600
    OPs made 2016 = £6142.12
    Starting balance 2012: £132000; balance June 2017: £99,974
    MFW2017 no. 38
    • Karmacat
    • By Karmacat 25th Jul 17, 12:58 PM
    • 27,736 Posts
    • 151,598 Thanks
    Karmacat
    Thanks for clarifying with your own experience Z, that feels tons better. Sorry its like that for you

    And ....

    Hello Everyone

    I brought cake back from Norfolk, look flapjacks too (sort of) ...

    Nothing like dealing with other people's life threatening emergencies to get rid of the aftereffects of a fatigue attack ... I couldn't do absolutely everything the others did (National Trust house belonging to the gay pirates in Suffolk went unvisited by me, shame!) but I did everything else.

    There was literally no time to get online, so I'm just now getting my feet under the desk/kitchen table, and the enforced break has given me a great idea about timing of my online visits, and I did it today. Emails, first thing, plus any admin arising. Then switch off, faff about the house and garden (it was getting to the stage where I had a second garden on the edge of the pavement at the front, so much soil and weed seed had accumulated ), have my Hobbitses' Second Breakfast, then come on to chat

    This is all if I'm at home, of course, if not, then all bets are off Fits in with the whole thing of doing bit-by-bit, even if its the same amount of time.

    I've also realised that the last big financial task is to understand all the pension hoo-hah. I thought I did but I don't so:
    - I've just got Martin's pdf guide.
    - I think it has to be 25% tax free lump plus income drawdown, but we'll see.
    - Can't do a transfer to Vanguard without cashing in the fund I want to transfer, which would lay me open to massive tax liabilities, so thats a non-starter.
    - my pension money is in 3 separate pots - need to know what the implications are of that for income drawdown.

    More later I want to catch up with everyone else first



    Retired August 2016
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