Your browser isn't supported
It looks like you're using an old web browser. To get the most out of the site and to ensure guides display correctly, we suggest upgrading your browser now. Download the latest:

Welcome to the MSE Forums

We're home to a fantastic community of MoneySavers but anyone can post. Please exercise caution & report spam, illegal, offensive or libellous posts/messages: click "report" or email forumteam@.

Search
  • FIRST POST
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 8th Mar 13, 8:30 AM
    • 3,806Posts
    • 19,707Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Looking for the silver lining
    • #1
    • 8th Mar 13, 8:30 AM
    Looking for the silver lining 8th Mar 13 at 8:30 AM
    Well I'm back! After clearing my debt in 2010 and staying debt free for a couple of years I'm now back to square one. Mainly due to OH's work being so erratic (he is a sub contractor in the building trade). He has weeks at a time with no work and when he does get work the pays not great - but anything is better than nothing. My wages cover the bills and food thankfully but nothing else.

    Anyway a combination of OH not bringing much in and not budgeting properly has led to me building up credit card debt again (thankfully at 0%) of £5368.95

    I have realised that the only way to stay on top of things is to stick to a budget. What we were doing before is spending the money before we had it on a credit card and then clearing it at the end of the month. But OH can be at work one day and laid off the next so we didn't always have the money to cover what we'd spent and this is where we have been going wrong and how the debt has built up again by me having to transfer it to a 0% card.

    What's happening now is I'm trying to stay on top of things by having a "pot" of money in my monthly budget and sticking to that. Once I have cracked this then it should be easy to stay out of debt when it's paid off.

    At the end of the month whatever OH has earned is split as follows:

    50% is for petrol, OH's work expenses/mobile phone, and anything else we need that month

    25% is for holidays (I know we shouldn't be having holidays whilst in debt but they keep us smiling through the uncertainty)

    25% is for paying off the debt and when this is paid off this will become savings.

    So far I've stuck to this for two months. It's hard at times but this is the only way to do it. Should OH not bring anything in one month then I'm afraid we'll have to dip into what little savings we have in our emergency fund. BUT NO MORE ADDING TO THE DEBT!!!

    Currently the debt is split between two cards:

    Barclaycard £1800 0% until September 2013 -so this must be paid off first

    Halifax £3568.95 0% until 2015 - so a bit more breathing space on this one but still want it paid off asap.

    I'm doing the grocery challenge and the virtual sealed pot and doing well with this. The VSP will pay for Christmas.

    Decided to do a new diary as it helped so much last time - so here I go again on my second debt-free journey. Determined this will be the last time.
    Debt free date 31/01/15
    Virtual Sealed Pot £262.12
    Weight loss 1/5lbs
    May AFD 0/8 NSD 0/8
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
Page 193
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 12th Mar 17, 8:20 PM
    • 46,070 Posts
    • 162,699 Thanks
    beanielou
    Just about to start when Breathe Becomes Air!!

    I miss my old life too.
    I did not appreciate how lucky I was.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • JWPopps
    • By JWPopps 13th Mar 17, 2:03 PM
    • 169 Posts
    • 887 Thanks
    JWPopps
    Hi SA

    Hope you had a lovely weekend, and that your ankle is feeling better.

    You know, sometimes I think your situation with Mr SA reminds me of me and my mum (not in many ways tbh, but a few...)

    A big one is that attitude of 'I don't want to save money, I want to spend!!' It's really hard to combat, for me because she's my mother and for you I imagine because he's your husband. With my mum I get so annoyed because she says she understands my point of view and has heard my concerns... and then she goes out and spends hundreds of pounds on food or clothes again!! She says things like 'well it's my money,' but that's only true until she comes to me two weeks before pay day asking for a loan...

    Most of the time I bite my tongue but sometimes that's not possible anymore. I imagine it's even harder in many ways with someone you've made a commitment to. With my mum at least I know she'll be moving out at some point...

    Not entirely sure what I'm trying to say here other than I totally empathise with how frustrating it can be!!
    CC 1 £0.00 / CC 2 £0.00 /
    Overdraft £0 / Loan £7,500
    Savings: £240/£1000



    PAYDBX 2017 - #19 : 33% paid 2715/8280
    • Bubblesmum
    • By Bubblesmum 13th Mar 17, 4:41 PM
    • 988 Posts
    • 5,718 Thanks
    Bubblesmum
    Caught up

    Hooray for Mammogram, WW and the count down to holiday....

    I hear what you say about Mr SA and his speech, and I too hate "support groups and would choose a night out with friends. One last ( I promise) thought would a family member come over to spend the evening with OH while you went out with mates?

    I am a reformed spender and lucky have a OH who understands and focuses my priorities.
    Mrs B Debt £1876 @ 5/01/2017
    • Verbatim
    • By Verbatim 13th Mar 17, 6:14 PM
    • 4,421 Posts
    • 12,553 Thanks
    Verbatim
    Great to look forward to your holiday but like everyone else I'm sorry that Mr SA is so selfish/ unappreciative of all you do for him. Also agree you should be able to get a night out without guilt or hassle to return home early. Could you be firmer next time or would that backfire? Is he any different on holiday? I remember he said a while back that he didn't want to go again. Would mil step in if you could go with a friend for a break away?
    Anyway total respect to you for doing all you do and keeping your cool!
    CCs @0% £24k Dec 05 £19,621.41 Au £13400 S 12600 Oct £11,981 £9481 £7500 Nov £7250 D £7100 Jan 6950 F £5800 Mar£5400 May £4830 June £4660 July £4460 Aug £3200, S £900, £0 18/9/07 DFW Nerd 042
    • mummytogirls
    • By mummytogirls 13th Mar 17, 8:22 PM
    • 5,055 Posts
    • 14,405 Thanks
    mummytogirls
    Yay to you managing on the cross trainer SA

    Holiday will be here before you know it xx
    Mummytogirls x

    £23164.32 - 12/12/10
    £8020.30 - 16/04/17 - 65.38% paid off
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 13th Mar 17, 8:30 PM
    • 3,806 Posts
    • 19,707 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Thanks both. I think the best thing all round is to stick to my lunchtime meet ups with friends then it doesn't involve him. There are no family members who would sit with him and sadly MIL passed away many years ago. There is no way I'd be able to go away with a friend. But he is better on holiday fortunately.

    Absolutely shattered today feel like I haven't slept. AFD and early night for me. Physio tomorrow.
    Debt free date 31/01/15
    Virtual Sealed Pot £262.12
    Weight loss 1/5lbs
    May AFD 0/8 NSD 0/8
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 15th Mar 17, 8:36 PM
    • 3,806 Posts
    • 19,707 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Physio went ok yesterday, I've got to stop using my crutch now. Ankle hurt a lot after rough handling, took painkillers and had early night. Still shattered as hardly slept last night, probably because of sore ankle.

    Anyway haven't used the crutch since, ankle still swollen and sore though. Trying to walk normally but people keep pointing out I'm limping. I don't realise I'm doing it.

    That aside, Ocado delivery today, had £20 off £80 spend so took advantage of their offers and spent as close as possible to £80 for £60.57

    Yesterday picked up euros from M&S so very high spend day.

    Doing well budget wise, am sticking to them and clearing off cc as fast as things are going on it which is the aim.

    Rang builder Monday, left message on voicemail asking if quotes ready but he's not returned my call yet.
    Debt free date 31/01/15
    Virtual Sealed Pot £262.12
    Weight loss 1/5lbs
    May AFD 0/8 NSD 0/8
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • -taff
    • By -taff 16th Mar 17, 6:03 AM
    • 7,055 Posts
    • 4,472 Thanks
    -taff
    I'm such an idiot, I've been wondering for ages what a VSP was, and I've just read your signature......doh!
    Happy Thursday, nearly the weekend
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 16th Mar 17, 10:33 AM
    • 46,070 Posts
    • 162,699 Thanks
    beanielou
    Breath Becomes Air was i think profoundly upfifting but also a reminder to us all that we dont know where life will take us.
    Live each day as best as we can.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 17th Mar 17, 8:37 PM
    • 3,806 Posts
    • 19,707 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    It was a quick read wasn't it Beanie? How awful for him at such a young age Plus a reminder that no matter how bad you think things are someone else's situation is always worse.

    No reply from builder yet. Typical when you have the money to get things done .... Will try again Monday. If still no joy will try someone else.

    NSD yesterday. Still crutch free, doing better but still limping.

    Not a lot planned for weekend, WW, cleaning and sorting through holiday clothes.
    Debt free date 31/01/15
    Virtual Sealed Pot £262.12
    Weight loss 1/5lbs
    May AFD 0/8 NSD 0/8
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 18th Mar 17, 7:01 PM
    • 3,806 Posts
    • 19,707 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Ended up not going to WW. Went into town with Mr SA instead. He had pleaded having nothing decent to wear. So took him to Primani. Stocked him up with joggers, sweatshirts and yet another pair of canvas slip on shoes. Our Primani has a very nice Costa in there so he was in seventh heaven.

    I ended up with a pair of sandals for £8, flat, not what I normally go for but can't do heels yet.

    Ended up going for lunch too but only £14 for the two of us so nothing extravagant.

    Took dog on park for the first time in ages but got soaked in the rain and had to put her in bath as she was covered in mud.

    Mr SA more worn out than me after trip to town and has vowed not to go in town again! I thought I did quite well and am now hopeful that I'll be back to walking to work after holiday.
    Debt free date 31/01/15
    Virtual Sealed Pot £262.12
    Weight loss 1/5lbs
    May AFD 0/8 NSD 0/8
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 18th Mar 17, 9:36 PM
    • 46,070 Posts
    • 162,699 Thanks
    beanielou
    A Costa in a Primari!!Who knew.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • *Robin*
    • By *Robin* 19th Mar 17, 11:02 AM
    • 3,153 Posts
    • 12,393 Thanks
    *Robin*
    Just popping in to wish you a wonderful holiday, Sun.A - enjoy!
    • Moneyfordreams
    • By Moneyfordreams 19th Mar 17, 3:47 PM
    • 811 Posts
    • 3,827 Thanks
    Moneyfordreams
    I don't post much, but I think you are amazing.

    hope you have an amazing holiday
    Mortgage Feb '13 £200000, end 2038. Aiming for before March 2025 (crunched to 2034)
    January 16 £182800 : minimum £360 OP but needs to be £600 to achieve 2025
    Current mortgage £162190
    Car loan finished oct 16
    h@lifax CC £4800 0% until May 2018.. will pay minimum for now, slow stooze
    xmas, chairs, hoover, computer and holiday clothes cc
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 19th Mar 17, 4:33 PM
    • 3,806 Posts
    • 19,707 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    Aw thank you MFD

    Have had a can't be bothered day. Not got as much done as I wanted to.

    Sorted out holiday clothes for both Mr SA and I - the suitcases are partially packed.

    While I was busy ironing Mr SA went in the garden in the mud with his new canvas shoes on. Caught him trying to hide them in the cupboard under the stairs where he hides all his other mud covered shoes.

    Really should do some exercises before my bath, even if only the ankle stretching ones.

    Have just made my soup for the week. Thankfully the last full working week for quite a while - I break up a week on Tuesday then the week back at work is Easter Friday and Monday so 2 more short weeks, then I'm off the following Friday for Mr SA's birthday and the Monday is Bank Holiday. So no more full weeks until week commencing 8 May

    Hope everyone has had a good weekend.
    Debt free date 31/01/15
    Virtual Sealed Pot £262.12
    Weight loss 1/5lbs
    May AFD 0/8 NSD 0/8
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • Moneyfordreams
    • By Moneyfordreams 19th Mar 17, 4:48 PM
    • 811 Posts
    • 3,827 Thanks
    Moneyfordreams
    Aw thank you MFD

    While I was busy ironing Mr SA went in the garden in the mud with his new canvas shoes on. Caught him trying to hide them in the cupboard under the stairs where he hides all his other mud covered shoes.

    .
    Originally posted by Sun Addict
    made me laugh out loud
    Mortgage Feb '13 £200000, end 2038. Aiming for before March 2025 (crunched to 2034)
    January 16 £182800 : minimum £360 OP but needs to be £600 to achieve 2025
    Current mortgage £162190
    Car loan finished oct 16
    h@lifax CC £4800 0% until May 2018.. will pay minimum for now, slow stooze
    xmas, chairs, hoover, computer and holiday clothes cc
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 19th Mar 17, 8:29 PM
    • 46,070 Posts
    • 162,699 Thanks
    beanielou
    The mud story also made me laugh as well~~ apologies.
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • Sun Addict
    • By Sun Addict 19th Mar 17, 8:44 PM
    • 3,806 Posts
    • 19,707 Thanks
    Sun Addict
    If I can cheer someone up along the way then it can't be bad The fact that he cleaned said shoes with my washing up sponge is another matter. The joys of looking after someone with a brain injury

    Today was a NSD

    Anyway back to work for a rest tomorrow.
    Debt free date 31/01/15
    Virtual Sealed Pot £262.12
    Weight loss 1/5lbs
    May AFD 0/8 NSD 0/8
    Mr SA finally in remission December 2013
    • beanielou
    • By beanielou 19th Mar 17, 9:03 PM
    • 46,070 Posts
    • 162,699 Thanks
    beanielou
    Did you ever find out about the mystery admirer then?
    From Nosey Nellie !in Scotland
    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/03/14.
    **Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** **Weight loss 2 stone 2 lbs **

    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    It starts with you, it starts from now. *** It is ok to be me.*** ***Keep plodding***
    • *Robin*
    • By *Robin* 20th Mar 17, 12:57 PM
    • 3,153 Posts
    • 12,393 Thanks
    *Robin*
    Have just made my soup for the week. Thankfully the last full working week for quite a while - I break up a week on Tuesday then the week back at work is Easter Friday and Monday so 2 more short weeks, then I'm off the following Friday for Mr SA's birthday and the Monday is Bank Holiday. So no more full weeks until week commencing 8 May
    Originally posted by Sun Addict
    Oops sorry, thought you were going away much sooner.. My "Happy holiday" wishes somewhat premature!

    ps. Reckon 95% of non-brain-damaged men wouldn't think twice about using a washing up sponge to clean footwear! The other 5% are probably the ones who wash up without being asked..
Welcome to our new Forum!

Our aim is to save you money quickly and easily. We hope you like it!

Forum Team Contact us

Live Stats

302Posts Today

2,522Users online

Martin's Twitter
  • The strange thing with a 4yr old is having to play & smile while inside feeling sick for those in trauma in my birth town #Manchester

  • Just a quick ta-ta for now. I'm taking the week off for family time with mini and Mrs MSE. So I won't be here much. Back after the bank hol

  • Ugh another one trying it! Beware https://t.co/Ab9fCRA76F

  • Follow Martin