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  • FIRST POST
    Former MSE Penelope
    Is it time to ban Christmas presents? Blog and poll discussion
    • #1
    • 10th Nov 09, 6:11 PM
    Is it time to ban Christmas presents? Blog and poll discussion 10th Nov 09 at 6:11 PM
    This is the discussion to link on the back of Martin's blog and poll. Please read the blog first, as this discussion follows it.



    And the vote results:

    Is it time to stop giving Christmas presents?

    Christmas has become a retail festival, celebrated by spending and shopping. Is it time to stop the sending of presents to reduce the pressure and obligation on others who can’t afford to spend on you? (For a full discussion see Martin’s Time to Ban Presents? six point manifesto)

    Which of these is closest to your view?

    A. We should stop giving presents to everyone (bah humbug) - 8% (1150 votes)
    B. Limit present giving just to your own kids - 18% (2441 votes)
    C. Limit present giving to immediate family – not friends or colleagues - 50% (6758 votes)
    D. Small gifts to a wider circle is fine - 16% (2241 votes)
    E. We should rejoice in giving as many and as big gifts as we can afford - 8% (1023 votes)

    This vote has now closed, but you can still click 'post reply' to discuss below

    Thanks

    ADDENDUM - TIMES2 and RADIO2

    What's interesting is to read the difference in the feedback on this from the times online version and here... see http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/the_way_we_live/article6911334.ece

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    Last edited by Former MSE Lawrence; 30-11-2009 at 3:33 PM.
Page 18
    • cinderfella
    • By cinderfella 11th Nov 12, 12:14 PM
    • 406 Posts
    • 234 Thanks
    cinderfella
    Well there is a way around this ever spend Xmas habit of buying unwanted gifts for relatives. Have some Xmas cards specially printed saying that basically 'we are not doing Xmas but giving a charitable donation instead to the 'abc' organisation on your behalf instead.' Problem solved
    • VfM4meplse
    • By VfM4meplse 16th Nov 13, 10:37 PM
    • 24,178 Posts
    • 50,843 Thanks
    VfM4meplse
    Just re-read the original article, and decided its time to get this thread going again for Christmas 2013.

    I was leafing through the Boots Health & Beauty magazine this evening and was entirely unimpressed by the focus on gift-giving. Give material items when there is a need or a particular want, otherwise something thoughtful is a much better idea.

    I thought the De-ho,ho-motivator was hilarious though
    Value-for-money-for-me-puhleeze!

    "No man is worth, crawling on the earth"- adapted from Bob Crewe and Bob Gaudio

    Hope is not a strategy ...A child is for life, not just 18 years....Don't get me started on the NHS, because you won't win...If in doubt, don't pull out... I love chaz-ing!
    • worried jim
    • By worried jim 16th Nov 13, 10:42 PM
    • 8,759 Posts
    • 13,372 Thanks
    worried jim
    I completely ignore Christmas, I just couldn't care less. The grief and hassle that people put themselves through, no wonder more murders are committed on Christmas day than any other.
    "Only two things are infinite-the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not so sure about the universe"
    Albert Einstein
    • seven-day-weekend
    • By seven-day-weekend 17th Nov 13, 5:26 AM
    • 29,843 Posts
    • 55,817 Thanks
    seven-day-weekend
    My little family has done the majority of its Christmas shopping.
    .
    From us - son has new waterproof trousers for when he rides his bike. We went halves with his girlfriend's new winter coat.

    From them - we are having an English Heritage membership for our Christmas and Birthdays, which are both in January.

    Just got my birth mother to do and we are doing her some photos in a silver frame that we already have (although never used). Some of us and some of her now deceased husband, whom she adored. She and I only met for the first time less than two years ago, so try to make up a bit for all the Christmases she never had She is in her eighties. I have a birth aunt too (in her nineties) and I shall buy her a small gift of chocs or biscuits.

    I have an elderly sister, but I'll send her a card, we haven't bought presents for each other for over thirty years.

    That's it. Easy Peasy. Don't know what all the fuss is about.
    Last edited by seven-day-weekend; 17-11-2013 at 5:58 AM.
    To love someone is to learn the song in their heart and to sing it to them when they have forgotten it
    'I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen. Not only because I see it, but because I see everything by it': C.S. Lewis
    'Let me tell you this one thing. When you fall out, as you will, don't get blaming each other. Look inside yourself first'. - Hilda Ogden, to Sally on her wedding day to Kevin, Coronation Street 1986. '
    • VfM4meplse
    • By VfM4meplse 17th Nov 13, 10:41 AM
    • 24,178 Posts
    • 50,843 Thanks
    VfM4meplse
    I completely ignore Christmas, I just couldn't care less. The grief and hassle that people put themselves through, no wonder more murders are committed on Christmas day than any other.
    Originally posted by worried jim


    Funerals are expensive, nothing MSE about that!
    Value-for-money-for-me-puhleeze!

    "No man is worth, crawling on the earth"- adapted from Bob Crewe and Bob Gaudio

    Hope is not a strategy ...A child is for life, not just 18 years....Don't get me started on the NHS, because you won't win...If in doubt, don't pull out... I love chaz-ing!
    • antrobus
    • By antrobus 17th Nov 13, 4:04 PM
    • 15,296 Posts
    • 21,827 Thanks
    antrobus
    .... The grief and hassle that people put themselves through, no wonder more murders are committed on Christmas day than any other.
    Originally posted by worried jim
    Really? Do you have a source for that data?

    The Home Office once did a report on the seasonality of crime. As far as I can remember it showed that there was more crime against the person in summer than winter.
    • Penelope Penguin
    • By Penelope Penguin 4th Dec 13, 7:24 AM
    • 17,084 Posts
    • 132,744 Thanks
    Penelope Penguin
    Well there is a way around this ever spend Xmas habit of buying unwanted gifts for relatives. Have some Xmas cards specially printed saying that basically 'we are not doing Xmas but giving a charitable donation instead to the 'abc' organisation on your behalf instead.' Problem solved
    Originally posted by cinderfella
    You might think so. I've just had a big birthday and my party invitations specifically asked for no gifts, and gave suggestions of 2 charities to give to instead. My in-laws completely ignored this and bought me a fleece gilet costing £120

    It's from an "outdoors boutique" that only exists in a town near them, so I can't return it. Doesn't fit me, either
    Badgers at the bottom of our garden
    • ScarletMarble
    • By ScarletMarble 4th Dec 13, 7:38 AM
    • 7,407 Posts
    • 13,601 Thanks
    ScarletMarble
    My family don't do Christmas presents. It's a blessing as saves me time, money and stress.

    Plus there is nothing worse than buying presents for people when they just put them back of a cupboard to be forgotten about until the first car boot of the year arrives.

    Go to any charity shop mid Jan onwards for seeing unwanted presents on the shelves.

    Plus shops are full of rip off gift sets. I have seen boxes of 2x Dove shower gel and a body puff thing for £7. Go to a supermarket that has Dove for £1 or £1.20, get a puff from Wilkinsons for 70p. You are paying more than double for a bloody box!

    I don't mind receiving gift cards, but not for shops I don't shop at or the nearest one is 55 miles away!
  • dstr
    I totally agree with this article. I recently wrote this poem to text/email to friends to try and push the point home with an element of laughter. Feel free to use it yourself!!

    Well here's wishing you all seasons greetings,
    And joyful drunken gatherings and meetings.
    For that is what gives me a real lift,
    Rather than panicking about a card and a gift.

    So this year all I request of you,
    is fun and frolics on an evening or two.
    I wish you all good luck and prosperity
    In these times of cutbacks and austerity!

    This Christmas I will donate to a good cause,
    and at my own fortunate position think and pause...
    Good food and company is what's important to me,
    But I still ain't putting up a sparkly christmas tree![/QUOTE]
  • DU51Two
    I told some of my family this year that I wasn't buying presents so I have been excluded from their Christmas celebrations. Just goes to show that they are only prepared to buy a present if they get one back! It reinforces the sanity of my decision! They obviously don't understand the spirit of Christmas.
    • ska lover
    • By ska lover 26th Dec 13, 12:32 AM
    • 2,551 Posts
    • 6,222 Thanks
    ska lover
    We decided to implement the no present rule this year, and we let extended family know in the summer, and reminded them a couple of times since.

    We are both working extreamly long hours so not much time for shopping, we are saving, and don't really believe in Christmas anyway, and to be honest, guilt ridden trips to charity shops in January. Most of the time, gifts received are never stuff we would choose ourselves

    Me and hubby 100% stuck to it, didn't buy anything for anyone, but to our horror, a few family members still insisted on giving gifts to us, which was highly embarrassing.
    Blah blah blah.
    • Flat Eric
    • By Flat Eric 29th Jul 16, 8:03 AM
    • 3,937 Posts
    • 23,863 Thanks
    Flat Eric
    This is a very interesting thread. I find that people don't bother with my birthday (i.e. siblings/other family) which I find hurtful but will buy a gift for me for Christmas when money is tight because there are lots of other gifts to buy and other associated Christmas expense, parties etc.

    • Living proof
    • By Living proof 30th Jul 16, 11:07 AM
    • 1,231 Posts
    • 8,054 Thanks
    Living proof
    I too have just found this thread. I instituted a no present rule a couple of years ago, and I just buy premium bonds for my grandchildren once a year and that covers Christmas and birthdays. Not because I am mean, but because they have way too much to begin with and as they live a distance away I have no idea what toys and clothes they have at any one time. My partner and I went abroad for a very low-key relaxed time last Christmas holiday and we plan to do the same again. All the commercial hype is ridiculous - we could these days eat a Christmas meal every weekend of the year - and it's not like the old days when the telly was really something to look forward to. If people are religious then I am sure they will enjoy the sacred element to the season, but the rest of us should keep our money in the bank and spare our nearest and dearest the embarrassment of receiving totally inappropriate gifts!
    Solar Suntellite 250 x16 4kW Afore 3600TL dual 2KW E 2KW W no shade, DN15 March 14
    Mortgage and Debt Free. Unfortunately Pension Free too!
    • Caddyman
    • By Caddyman 28th Nov 17, 8:01 PM
    • 275 Posts
    • 171 Thanks
    Caddyman
    This thread just keeps giving, consider this my Christmas gift!

    I stopped giving presents and cards at Christmas several years ago. It became utterly pointless. As a result, I have absolutely zero stress. I don't expect any cards or presents and nor do I receive them, despite the fact I still get asked every single year if I'd like something. To be honest, I've got enough 'stuff' in my life without adding to it. If I want something, I buy it for myself. My partner and I still enjoy a cracking Christmas dinner, we still socialise, but at the end of it all, we ain't broke, we don't owe anybody anything.

    The problem with many people is, they feel utterly obligated. Children often 'expect' gifts and it's hardly surprising when from a commercial aspect, Christmas for many shops now starts seemingly unashamedly, in October. I'm not in any way religious, so there's no draw for me there either. As far as I'm concerned, Christmas could be a total non event for me and it wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

    Bah Humbug!
    • mindwave
    • By mindwave 29th Nov 17, 1:28 PM
    • 8 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    mindwave
    I had a chat with all my friends this year, we have agreed not to buy presents, as it was difficult knowing what to buy anyway. So that has cut our Christmas bills down dramatically. Actually is is a relief. Taken some of the pressure off.
    On the question should Christmas be cancelled. Well this is a religious festival celebrating the birth of Christ. So no we should not cancel Christmas.
    • mindwave
    • By mindwave 29th Nov 17, 1:40 PM
    • 8 Posts
    • 4 Thanks
    mindwave
    Just Christmas cards
    This is my thought about Christmas, think it is nice enough to share.

    There is a list of folks, I know, all written in the book
    And every year at Christmas time, I go and take a look.
    And that is when I realize that these names are a part,
    Not of the book they are written in but of my very heart.

    For each name stands for someone who has touched my life some time,
    And in that meeting they’ve become etched forever in my mind.
    For once you have known someone, the years cannot erase,
    The memory of a pleasant word, or a friendly face.

    So never think my Christmas cards are just a mere routine,
    Of a name upon a list, to be forgotten in between.
    For when I send a Christmas card that is addressed to you.
    It is because you’re on the list that I’m indebted to.

    And whether I’ve known you many years or even just a few,
    In some ways you have had a part in shaping things I do.
    So every year when Christmas comes, I just realize anew,
    The biggest gift that God can give is knowing folks like you.

    Have a good and peaceful Christmas everyone.
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