We can't afford to live together and have children

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  • JPB156
    JPB156 Posts: 91 Forumite
    That's a big help livelongandprosper, I had tried working out a budget and was putting in 300 for shopping.
    The house just feels too good for us can't tell if I'm dreaming or knocking myself down
  • mai_taylor
    mai_taylor Posts: 220 Forumite
    edited 19 May 2017 at 3:17PM
    JPB156 wrote: »
    The comment about price was a reply to someone saying sell if it doesn't work out.

    How is the cost of living whatever you want it to be, there will be a bare minimum that you can't get below unless you starve or have your water cut off

    Cost of living varies widely. No one can tell you how much money you'll spend on clothes a month or how much you spend on a mobile phone contract. If things are tight to start with cut back. We got broadband free for a year for, joined quidco so that we got cashback on a lot of the initial bills, shopped at Aldi not Waitrose. Most set in stone bills are mortgage and council tax, everything else vary's.
  • JPB156
    JPB156 Posts: 91 Forumite
    My girlfriend would never whack the heating up, my parents house is boiling because the heating is always on and always says just put a jumper on! :)
  • JPB156
    JPB156 Posts: 91 Forumite
    I wish the mortgage was set in stone and it is for the first 5 years and then it's whatever they want it to be. I knew it could change but Im fully aware I was naive to not realise how much a few percent can double it and that's what has really hit me and knocked my confidence
  • kelpie35
    kelpie35 Posts: 1,781 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post
    Take a deep breath OP.

    It is very good that you are taking this very seriously. It will probably be one of the biggest decision you and your partner will ever make.

    Write down all your outgoings from mortgage payment to things like hair cuts. Total them up and if you have surplus money left at the end of the month use that to overpay your mortgage.

    Do not take out loans to furnish your home, look to buy second hand or free items on FB selling sites.

    I am sure that you will both find a way of managing.

    Take care
  • mai_taylor
    mai_taylor Posts: 220 Forumite
    JPB156 wrote: »
    I wish the mortgage was set in stone and it is for the first 5 years and then it's whatever they want it to be. I knew it could change but Im fully aware I was naive to not realise how much a few percent can double it and that's what has really hit me and knocked my confidence

    5 years is forever, do you really want to be living with your parents in 5 years? In life you have to adapt as circumstances change. If you have spare cash save it for emergency's, if things are tight eat beans on toast. I wish I had a £40,000 deposit for my first home!

    We had £7,000 and had to furnish the entire house for the £700 we had left.
  • Malthusian
    Malthusian Posts: 10,931 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Name Dropper Photogenic
    Remember that if you decide you can afford it, and your sums are wrong, it is easy to reduce expenditure.

    If you decide you can't afford it, and your sums are wrong, you have lost the house. And probably the girl. (Well you should have.)

    You should waste less energy on what might go wrong and concentrate on what the actual consequences of the decision are.
    How is the cost of living whatever you want it to be, there will be a bare minimum that you can't get below unless you starve or have your water cut off

    Running water piped into your house has only been considered a bare minimum in this country for less than a century so you're proving my point - the cost of living is based on what you choose to buy. You can afford the bare minimum on benefits, so whatever you do that is not a concern.
  • black_wings
    black_wings Posts: 87 Forumite
    edited 19 May 2017 at 3:24PM
    JPB156 wrote: »
    I wish the mortgage was set in stone and it is for the first 5 years and then it's whatever they want it to be. I knew it could change but Im fully aware I was naive to not realise how much a few percent can double it and that's what has really hit me and knocked my confidence

    So fix for 5 year and make overpayments? Then after 5 years when you remortgage/product switch you owe less. With the decent size deposit you have it already puts you in a good position so at each remortgage point you will have built up more and more equity and will be eligible for better LTV rates.
    I understand your worry...but...I think literally everyone with a mortgage is in the same boat so you might as well just get on with it since you have your deposit ready to go and it's time you moved our of your parents house before you have wasted your life.
  • heartbreak_star
    heartbreak_star Posts: 8,286 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Combo Breaker Rampant Recycler
    £900 is a massive amount to live on, honestly - have a look at the DFW and OS boards on here :) lots of them have under half that and have children but manage OK!

    HBS x
    "I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another."

    "It's easy to know what you're against, quite another to know what you're for."

    #Bremainer
  • Red-Squirrel_2
    Red-Squirrel_2 Posts: 4,341 Forumite
    JPB156 wrote: »
    That's another problem I have which I didn't want to post and why we feel rushed, but I was told last year I have a low count

    Why did you have your fertility checked when you're adamant you can't afford children?
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