The MSE Forum will be undergoing some maintenance this evening. As a result, some users may experience temporary performance issues. Please use the Site Feedback board to report anything major. Thank you for your patience.

Is this person just trying to get her hands on lady's inheritance?

applepicker
applepicker Posts: 151 Forumite
I live in a town on the South Coast and I do gardening in a rich part of the town. This old woman (90) has a bungalow and it's probably worth £500,000. I have worked there for 5 years and in that whole time this woman (mid-late 50) a school TA has been coming round and seeing her. Apparently she takes no money and looks after her. All the neighbours think she's a carer, but she doesn't get any money. They first met a few years ago when she and her husband did gardening for her. I think she just tried this when her kids grew up and she wanted a job, she's now a teaching assistant in a school. She has never been very friendly to me and was always in conflict with another lady who worked there before and did the cleaning. The cleaner said she was a stirrer and conniving. Recently she came out of hospital and I went around to collect some money for sorting out the bins. She marched up the drive didn't say hello to me which is normal and said to the carers I am the next of kin. She seems to be trying to control everything about the lady's life. The old lady thinks she's wonderful and keeps saying she's the best friend ever- goes to her bed in hospital etc She says she's teacher and ex-nurse etc etc Her husband who is also wonderful according to her does her accounts and manages her money. The ex-cleaner who got sick of it all and quit told me the old lady was always talking about who was on the will etc The old lady seems a bit nuts to me. For example, she's German and actually met Hitler. She said to me she was told in high school that Hitler killed himself when he heard about all the Jews being gassed and couldn't live with himself and that it was the men who surrounded Hitler who were responsible for it. She still absolutely believes that lol, After hearing this and other crazy things I think she's quite gullible.


Have I got this wrong, is the lady in her 50s whole friendship based on her getting the inheritance? Will she definitely get it? Apparently, the German lady has a nephew in Germany, she also has a genuine friend (another old lady) who lives down the road. Her husband who was rich and had all the money (is dead) has lots of nephews and nieces.
«134567

Comments

  • tea_lover
    tea_lover Posts: 8,261 Forumite
    And this is any of your business because....?
  • tea_lover
    tea_lover Posts: 8,261 Forumite
    Also, a woman who is now in her 90s would have left school well before Hitler died.
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,577
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post Savvy Shopper!
    Forumite
    I don't think anyone can answer your questions.

    You clearly think this woman is after the old lady's money but we - as random strangers on t'internet - have no idea.

    You are getting a lot of information 2nd hand:
    The ex-cleaner who got sick of it all and quit told me the old lady was always talking about who was on the will etc
    Talking to a cleaner about who you've left what in your will is not the same as actually writing a will.
    Have I got this wrong, is the lady in her 50s whole friendship based on her getting the inheritance? Will she definitely get it? Apparently, the German lady has a nephew in Germany, she also has a genuine friend (another old lady) who lives down the road. Her husband who was rich and had all the money (is dead) has lots of nephews and nieces.
    After the recent case of the deceased Mother who disinherited her daughter and left her money to animal charities, had it overturned so the daughter got £50K, then increased to £150K on appeal then just a day or so ago had it revised down to £50K (this was over a 13 year period), I don't know who can say whether - even if she is sole beneficiary - she will get it.

    It really sounds strange for someone to do this:
    Recently she came out of hospital and I went around to collect some money for sorting out the bins. She marched up the drive didn't say hello to me which is normal and said to the carers I am the next of kin.

    Do the nephews and nieces visit?

    If you think this lady is vulnerable and being taken advantage of you could report it:
    https://www.gov.uk/report-abuse-of-older-person

    but I think I'd need much more proof than you seem to have.

    I'd carry on mowing the lawn and weeding the flower beds.
  • *Robin*
    *Robin* Posts: 3,364
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post Stoptober Survivor
    Forumite
    tea_lover wrote: »
    And this is any of your business because....?

    Bit harsh, Tea lover. A sad reflection of society today.

    OP, contact your local authority Elder Abuse team and let them investigate - Tea lover's reaction shows how your concern is likely to be viewed if you attempt to take action yourself.
  • tea_lover
    tea_lover Posts: 8,261 Forumite
    The woman has been visiting regularly for at least 5 years, including when the person is in hospital. The elderly lady seems perfectly happy with her, and there is absolutely no evidence of any wrongdoing.
  • PeacefulWaters
    PeacefulWaters Posts: 8,495 Forumite
    50 year old lady decides to put something back into society by being friendly to frail elderly lady.
  • FBaby
    FBaby Posts: 18,367
    First Anniversary First Post Combo Breaker
    Forumite
    Good on you if you genuinely care that this old lady is not being financially and emotionally abused but the reality is that unless you have clear evidence of this carer and her husband providing all their support as a mean to put pressure on this lady by blackmail so she puts their name on her will, what do you think you can do?

    In the end, maybe they do genuinely care about her and really have her best interest at heart and don't expect anything from her will.

    Or maybe they genuinely to care about her and want to be sure she is safe and well looked after, and have thought that if they are left something in the will, then they will accept it gracefully.

    Or maybe they want to care and expect something from the will, but that's still not a crime, nor even if they do all this purely for the purpose of being in her good books with a high chance to be left the house. For all you know, the lady is fully aware of this, but she actually DO want to leave them everything because she does appreciate all they are doing for her.

    If however you were to witness a conversation between the wife and husband, where the husband stated that he had diverted some funds that they will be able to use to book their summer holiday, or the wife says to the husband that she had a talk to the old lady and told her very clearly that unless she changed her will by the end of the week, she would stop coming and make sure to tell everyone that she was a close friend of Hitler so that no-one would agree to come and care for her, then you have nothing to go by to support a case for emotional/financial abuse.
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,577
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post Savvy Shopper!
    Forumite
    *Robin* wrote: »
    Bit harsh, Tea lover. A sad reflection of society today.

    OP, contact your local authority Elder Abuse team and let them investigate - Tea lover's reaction shows how your concern is likely to be viewed if you attempt to take action yourself.
    I don't actually see it as a case of 'not your business' but more of 'do I really have sufficient proof to open a potential can of worms when all I have is 2nd or 3rd hand 'tittle-tattle' from other people when the lady in question has this opinion:
    The old lady thinks she's wonderful and keeps saying she's the best friend ever- goes to her bed in hospital etc
    of the person I'm going to report?'
  • fairy_lights
    fairy_lights Posts: 9,220 Forumite
    *Robin* wrote: »
    Bit harsh, Tea lover. A sad reflection of society today.

    OP, contact your local authority Elder Abuse team and let them investigate - Tea lover's reaction shows how your concern is likely to be viewed if you attempt to take action yourself.
    But it doesn't sound like there's anything for the Elder Abuse team to investigate. The woman isn't taking any money off the elderly lady, visits her regularly and the old lady sounds pretty happy with the arrangement.
    Why is it any concern of the OP's who gets the ladies inheritance?
  • Carl31
    Carl31 Posts: 2,616
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post Combo Breaker
    Forumite
    it definitely doesn't hurt to investigate

    Whilst it is up to the old lady whom she gives inheritance to, if the younger lady is helping with intention of gain, its deception or maybe fraud, although it would be pretty hard to prove, and even then it needs someone to make the claim for charges to commence

    Hard one to prove, the younger lady could be genuine, but i know of someone that did something similar, so it can happen
This discussion has been closed.
Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 342.4K Banking & Borrowing
  • 249.9K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 449.4K Spending & Discounts
  • 234.6K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 607K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 172.8K Life & Family
  • 247.4K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.8K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards