Help for friend whose husband has been hospitalised with vascular dementia

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thorsoak
thorsoak Posts: 7,166 Forumite
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As the header says - friend (who lives in rural Lincolnshire) is age 61, her OH is 72. He was diagnosed with vascular dementia two years ago, she has osteoporosis. He is 6ft 2in, she is 4ft 10ins.

Up to the present time, they've managed - he has been going to a centre once a week for a while, but now after several falls/outbreaks of violence against his wife (completely out of character) at the weekend he was admitted to hospital.

Now she is worried that she will not be able to cope with him at home again (their only son lives 150 miles away), but she is also worried sick about finances. They have a certain amount of savings (not quite sure how much) and they own their house outright. Her son wants them/her to move back near to him and his young family,but she worries that if he is in care that if she sells, the local authority will demand his 50% of the property for his care - and she will not be able to buy anything with her half of the proceeds.

Can anyone help with websites/organisations that can give her information? She's not begrudging paying for care, but just how it will be paid.

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  • NYM
    NYM Posts: 4,066 Forumite
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    Try these sites...

    Care Funding guidance

    Age UK - Care Homes & Your Property
  • Jackieboy
    Jackieboy Posts: 1,010 Forumite
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    thorsoak wrote: »
    As the header says - friend (who lives in rural Lincolnshire) is age 61, her OH is 72. He was diagnosed with vascular dementia two years ago, she has osteoporosis. He is 6ft 2in, she is 4ft 10ins.

    Up to the present time, they've managed - he has been going to a centre once a week for a while, but now after several falls/outbreaks of violence against his wife (completely out of character) at the weekend he was admitted to hospital.

    Now she is worried that she will not be able to cope with him at home again (their only son lives 150 miles away), but she is also worried sick about finances. They have a certain amount of savings (not quite sure how much) and they own their house outright. Her son wants them/her to move back near to him and his young family,but she worries that if he is in care that if she sells, the local authority will demand his 50% of the property for his care - and she will not be able to buy anything with her half of the proceeds.

    Can anyone help with websites/organisations that can give her information? She's not begrudging paying for care, but just how it will be paid.

    Won't it be better for him to go into care after the move, otherwise he's going to be 150 miles away from his wife and family? It's going to be difficult to check out care homes from that sort of distance.

    Have they claimed AA and CA yet?
  • thorsoak
    thorsoak Posts: 7,166 Forumite
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    They would first have to sell their current home and buy another - he is in hospital at the moment, and wife says that she doesn't think that her health will cope with him at home for much longer - he has collapsed before several times and she has had to call for someone to help her lift him into a chair/bed again - one day, she needed help 3 times.
  • Jackieboy
    Jackieboy Posts: 1,010 Forumite
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    thorsoak wrote: »
    They would first have to sell their current home and buy another - he is in hospital at the moment, and wife says that she doesn't think that her health will cope with him at home for much longer - he has collapsed before several times and she has had to call for someone to help her lift him into a chair/bed again - one day, she needed help 3 times.

    It could be possible to sort all that out in a few months if the son helps out at his end. I know you can't ask but it may well depend on what their savings are - few problems are insoluble if you throw money at them.

    Does their son live in a cheaper or more expensive area and do they own the sort of property they could trade down from?
  • bspm
    bspm Posts: 541 Forumite
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    Hi

    I have not worked in Mental Health for a few years now but when I did we arranged free care for people with certain illnesses.

    One of these was vascular dementia.

    Check out this link which, though a few years old, may still apply.


    http://www.alzheimerswiltshire.org.uk/support-files/The-secret-law-that-means-dementia-care-can-be-free-_-The-Sunday-Times-(2).pdf
  • plasticcheese
    plasticcheese Posts: 31 Forumite
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    My MIL was in a similar situation. She got FIL settled in the new care home (council/social services are paying for it all as they have less than the savings allowed, think that figure is around £18K) and she then sold the family home and downsized. Because it is still her home, nobody can force her to sell or use the money on his care.

    She did move locally though, as it would be near impossible to move his care home further afield. Most councils don't like paying for care for those who have been diagnosed and admitted elsewhere.
  • teddysmum
    teddysmum Posts: 9,471 Forumite
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    plasticcheese wrote: »
    My MIL was in a similar situation. She got FIL settled in the new care home (council/social services are paying for it all as they have less than the savings allowed, think that figure is around £18K) and she then sold the family home and downsized. Because it is still her home, nobody can force her to sell or use the money on his care.

    She did move locally though, as it would be near impossible to move his care home further afield. Most councils don't like paying for care for those who have been diagnosed and admitted elsewhere.



    I have a feeling that, when reading up on this, a few years ago, I read that, though the home is not counted if the spouse (or certain others ) continues to live there, if the house is sold, some of the money is counted as belonging to and now free for the person in care, but that the person moving is allowed more than half to help with the move.
  • thorsoak
    thorsoak Posts: 7,166 Forumite
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    Jackieboy wrote: »
    It could be possible to sort all that out in a few months if the son helps out at his end. I know you can't ask but it may well depend on what their savings are - few problems are insoluble if you throw money at them.

    Does their son live in a cheaper or more expensive area and do they own the sort of property they could trade down from?

    Son lives in (Urban) Essex, so property is at a premium there - friend knows that she will have to downsize, but the difference in price between rural Lincolnshire and urban Essex is pretty big. Son is pre-occupied by the fact that his wife is expecting baby no 2 in a few weeks.
  • thorsoak
    thorsoak Posts: 7,166 Forumite
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    bspm wrote: »
    Hi

    I have not worked in Mental Health for a few years now but when I did we arranged free care for people with certain illnesses.

    One of these was vascular dementia.

    Check out this link which, though a few years old, may still apply.


    http://www.alzheimerswiltshire.org.uk/support-files/The-secret-law-that-means-dementia-care-can-be-free-_-The-Sunday-Times-(2).pdf

    Thanks - that's just the sort of information I was looking for - I thought I had read that somewhere!
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