£67,031.92 is a frightening number indeed....

Treadingonplaymobil · 13 February 2017 at 6:26AM

armchairexpert wrote: »

Groceries is definitely your target. If your kids are eating beans on toast because they've had a hot lunch, and you're eating mostly vegetarian food, I am completely mystified as to where that 500 is going. Can you swap to a cheaper supermarket? Tracking and meal planning will probably do loads to help just on its own.
Kids' clothes and even your clothes are another one to be tackled: I'm on a lot of FB swap-and-sale groups for high end labels, and I see a lot of stuff come up that's still new season but half the price because someone's worn it twice and decided they don't love it - is that worth seeking out for a few of your favourite brands? Kid 3, I think, could be well outfitted by hitting the thrift stores in a posh area!

These are definitely coming out as the two areas that I need to do something about immediately. Cheaper supermarket is the first step, plus some wardrobe planning to see what my kids actually might need over the coming months. Haven't ever even looked at FB groups for this sort of thing!

FatVonD wrote: »

If your grocery bill is high because you can't resist buying a new toy or magazine then shopping online could be your answer to cutting your shopping budget significantly.
I too think you should cancel the holiday, is it really only going to cost £300 + £100? What about food and spending money while you're there?

I'm confident the holiday will only cost that - self catering so just normal food bill, and no additional activities to pay for. I also couldn't begin to contemplate telling the parents that we were too broke to afford it when we'd said yes four months ago!
Online shopping for food could work, but actually I've done really well before by just going to Aldi/Lidl (with a strict list) and then buying extras that we really in Sainsburys. I used to shop for a lot less, it has definitely crept up again over the past 3 months, and by more than just the food price increase.

Honeysucklelou2 wrote: »

Totally get the idea of not wanting your children to miss out. I have National Trust membership as it quickly pays for itself and allows days out across the country should you want that. With my children, particularly as they have got older, I've had to limit what they can do, so one daughter has chosen not to have music lessons because she preferred to do something else. We don't do swimming lessons but
I try to take them swimming as often as time and budget allow.

Swimming is fairly essential for us (coastal location, spend a lot of time at the beach), but I think I need to have a little internal rule that if they want to start something new then they'll have to choose between it and music until our debt is much more manageable.

Treadingonplaymobil · 13 February 2017 at 6:48AM

Day 2

Wow, so much food for thought yesterday. A huge thank you to everyone who took the time to comment, help me really clarify what the stupid parts of the budget are and what needs to be tackled first - it's so helpful to get an outside perspective, as some numbers become so normalised that it seems impossible to change them.

Some plans...

To do today:
1. Check children's wardrobes and establish what might need buying in the next two months, and how to do it for less
2. Pack snacks for journey to visit family today, so we don't get tempted to stop and buy anything on the way
3. Have a NSD

To do this week:
1. Redo our budget to ensure that even if I only earn my minimum of £250 per month, that the shortfall is gone, whether it has to come from clothes, food, entertainment or whatever. It's lovely to try to earn extra to cover it every month, but I need to get us to a position where if I don't that we're not getting further into debt.
2. We are away visiting family from today until Thursday, so no worries about food shopping until then (DH at home, but can make do with what's in the house, there is loads), but I'm going to challenge myself to make Thursday's top up shop to get us through until the following Tuesday (normal food shopping day) come in at under £30.
3. List child 3's old cot on eBay
4. Menu plan for next week and use MySupermarket to keep the cost down to <£60 for the week
5. DH - water meter reading to make sure our direct debit is accurate
6. DH - gas and electricity readings, to make sure direct debit is accurate

I did have a list of longer term aims, but I know I am much better at looking long term and making lovely optimistic plans, and ignoring what's happening right now, so I have deleted it and am going to concentrate on getting those short term goals in place before I think more long term.

ani*fan · 13 February 2017 at 7:28AM

This looks to me like a solid plan. Bravo! :T

A few thoughts...

You mentioned your children have really good quality clothes that they sometimes grow out of before they're worn, could you sell some of these on ebay or elsewhere?

Getting snacks arranged in advance is brilliant. Part of this is being much more organised than you've ever been before. Same goes for food shopping and meal planning.

You could try gumtree for selling the cot. It's more local so buyers know they have to pick up and that you're not prepared to try and post a cot.

If you're in credit with the gas or electricity, get them to refund the cash. It's yours.

I totally agree that dealing with immediate concerns is the way forward. If you look too long term then it beomes very disheartening and maybe overwhelming.

My apologies if I sounded too severe yesterday. You do sound like you have a better hold of this today and that's great.

I hope you and the children have a lovely few days with your family.

angelpye · 13 February 2017 at 8:56AM

Someone bought their 'A' game! Sounds like you have a plan

You can do this and you will find a way that suits you plus cutting down can be quite addictive!

I am by the sea too and totally agree with swimming lessons as a necessary.

I have always done well on Eb@y when I actually put the effort in to list kids clothes - don't get anywhere near what I paid for them but all adds up. Even bundles of more worn clothes have sold - although I made sure pics clearly showed they were not in nearly new condition.

Hope you enjoy your time away

Honeysucklelou2 · 13 February 2017 at 9:26AM

I too am in a coastal location but ultimately if I can't afford swimming lessons, then I do the next best thing and take them as much as I can afford to. I did begin with swimming lessons, amongst other activities but the overall cost was too much and I was getting into more debt to continue them, hence why I stopped. Schools are obliged to teach swimming as part of the National Curriculum and lots of schools do extend that to KS1 as well.
Everybody's debt busting journey is different, for me I've had to cut back on children's activities until I'm in a better financial place. We still have days out but these tend to be NT days out or beach days.

Good idea to sell any high end clothes on EBay.

Macey1510 · 13 February 2017 at 11:25AM

Good luck with your goals!

GeorgianaCavendish · 13 February 2017 at 12:20PM

Just wanted to pop in and say good luck! I think you've done really well in getting your SOA done and identifying the spendiest areas.
I'm very new to these boards myself so don't have much to say apart from good luck! I've subscribed to your thread

Kittencat · 13 February 2017 at 1:51PM

zippygeorgeandben wrote: »

Are you providing packed lunches for the 6 and 8 year old? All school meals are free now for Primary aged children, regardless. Good luck!

My little one is in Reception and we still pay if she wants hot dinners.

Treadingonplaymobil · 13 February 2017 at 6:11PM

ani*fan wrote: »

Getting snacks arranged in advance is brilliant. Part of this is being much more organised than you've ever been before. Same goes for food shopping and meal planning.

If you're in credit with the gas or electricity, get them to refund the cash. It's yours.

My apologies if I sounded too severe yesterday. You do sound like you have a better hold of this today and that's great. I hope you and the children have a lovely few days with your family.

I'm hoping there's a bit of credit on the gas and electricity and we can get refund and/or reduce the DD a bit. No idea though - will be depressing if it turns out it's exactly right or a bit short! Will be an incentive to put some energy saving measures in place. And yes to the organising - part of my job is being killer at organisation and planning, I need to apply those skills here.
And the harshness yesterday from anyone wasn't a problem - I posted here to get ideas and be accountable, and you were all doing exactly what was needed.

angelpye wrote: »

Someone bought their 'A' game! Sounds like you have a plan

You can do this and you will find a way that suits you plus cutting down can be quite addictive!

I am by the sea too and totally agree with swimming lessons as a necessary.

I have always done well on Eb@y when I actually put the effort in to list kids clothes - don't get anywhere near what I paid for them but all adds up. Even bundles of more worn clothes have sold - although I made sure pics clearly showed they were not in nearly new condition.

Hadn't even thought about selling properly worn out clothes - have been merrily charity shopping or donating to friends. Will improve on that in future! thanks for the words of support.

GeorgianaCavendish wrote: »

Just wanted to pop in and say good luck! I think you've done really well in getting your SOA done and identifying the spendiest areas.
I'm very new to these boards myself so don't have much to say apart from good luck! I've subscribed to your thread

Thank you! Lovely to have you aboard :-)

copperman05 · 13 February 2017 at 6:57PM

Just wanted to say hello and good luck, have you tried using budgeting software like YNAB (YouNeedABudget)? I've found it invaluable in getting my finances sorted, and strangely even fun to use.

£67,031.92 is a frightening number indeed....

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