Frump to Fab 2017 - A Whole New World

floss a few parents at school joked about 'chicken pox parties'. I'm surprised mine have only just caught it - they've both been to nursery since they were under one plus have have lots of contact with other children who have had it.

I love a ceilidh maman!! Such good fun as well as good exercise. You need a good lively group and host though, otherwise people can start to look a bit grumpy and not want to join in, or at least in some of the ones I've been to!


I'm not surprised you're getting addicted to ceroc indie, it is so sociable and (for me at least) it felt like a whole new lease of life. I met such fabulous people and it was so easy to get chatting, plus you can go pretty much every night should you be lucky enough to live near a few groups. My current dance class is no longer part of the ceroc franchise but it's great nevertheless, although I only see what's happening on Facebook nowadays.


Sugarbaby, what a lovely thing to do for your brother, not just the cleaning but helping him update his kitchen. As you say other people have been commenting on it, but aren't willing/ able to roll their sleeves up and give him a hand!


I hope you are recovering well LL and enjoying some gentle fabbing..... pleased to hear that things are amicable with your sister, and that's no longer such a source of stress for you.


Things are a bit stressful for me as the boys are real sleep thieves at the moment - DS1 in particular is sometimes up three times a night for milk/ water - and OH is moaning about various things again. I tried to go out for a coffee with a friend on Monday evening - she's just split up with her boyfriend and I wanted to make sure she was ok - but he moaned so much about having to come home a bit early to look after the boys and that 'he was paying' for me to go out that I didn't bother he said that I'd only been out the day before, which to be fair I had, but only to Pizza Express with a friend and he took the boys for Sunday dinner at his mum's anyway! I've been out with friends a total of three times this year - the trip to London that I agonised over (cost about £30 including train fare), lunch at Ask with a friend (free as she had a voucher), and Pizza Express (cost £15). For comparison, he went out three times this week.....


I was thinking today about the reasons I overeat/ eat bad things and apart from craving sugar because I'm always so flipping tired, I also came up with:
- what's the point in looking good because the boys don't care what I look like
- no-one else sees me much and if they're a friend they don't care either what my weight is
- I feel like my identity has changed from 'the slim fit one who goes to the gym a lot' to 'the one who stays at home all the time looking after babies'
- OH is less than helpful in allowing me to go to the gym/ aerobics as I would desperately like to, and in generally making me feel ok about leaving the boys - he keeps saying I should leave them with his mum & dad more often, but if I do then he moans that I'm enjoying myself and spending all his money whilst he's at work.


Oh blimey, I could go on but it's turned into a real rant of a post, sorry!! At least that's clarified some of it in my mind. Now to work on turning it around into something positive.....!


Hope everyone is having a great weekend and enjoying the sunshine :cool:

That was a heartfelt post ruby. I'm sure you didn't mean it that way but I didn't like the comment about your DH 'allowing you' to go to the gym. I think you meant in a facilitating sense but the principle is the same. The way it comes across to me is that your DH is allowing the arrival of the babies to change your life completely. I think that's probably because he feels he is doing his bit as he's become the sole breadwinner plus the other disruptions to his daily life whereas you can stay at home and all you have to do is look after the children.


I understand what you mean about 'no one else sees you' so what's the point in looking good. I think it does matter because it's for you and your self esteem not for everyone else. I'm sure you know you'd feel better if you ate more healthily, exercised and lost some weight. Treating tiredness with a quick sugar hit isn't the best way although it may feel comforting at the time.


Three things that worked for me.


I had just two years as a SAHM and I grabbed every opportunity to be me rather than mum IYSWIM. I was delighted after 2 years to put DD in a nursery and get back to work. In those two years my MIL looked after DD for a day every week. She loved having her all to herself and I usually met a friend for lunch or whatever I fancied. We frequently went out at weekends with my mother or MIL babysitting or used a babysitting circle (yes, they were good LL). Midweek I'd go out for the evening (I kept up my dancing even then) with my friends and so would my DH. So take up every possible offer of babysitting including any activities with a crèche attached.


If you can go to the gym then that's great but otherwise just get out there pushing the pram! I lived at the top of a hill when DD was little and my leg muscles were amazing!


Being a SAHM can be boring and lonely. Join things. Go to toddler groups or soft play centres or just play parks and get talking to other mums.
I know it must be much harder having 2 babies than one but it has to be worth a try. You're not happy as you are.:grouphug:


The dancing do is similar to ceilidh dancing but with a bit more attention to detail. This is one of the dances I did this week.
https://www.scottish-country-dancing-dictionary.com/video/quarries-jig.html


Sorry it's an all male group doing the demonstration.


Beautiful day here. Not sure what's happening, may have some visitors (DD going to NYC on Tuesday so she'll call by sometime) but if not I'll sit in the garden with my book like I did yesterday!:D

Oh Ruby, I am afraid I don't have much useful advice on the family front as I've never married and had children, but I had to post to send you a big hug. Your husband seems to have the kind of traditional attitude that my dad had, and it was that kind of attitude that made me think I really didn't want to have a family. I would have gone a bit mad staying at home and I don't think it did wonders for my mum's mental health either. Hopefully LL, Maman and Floss' advice will help you find a way forward.

The only advice I can offer is on the eating front, if you can wean yourself off the sugar onto a healthier diet it will give you far more of an energy boost than the quick hit you get from sugar. I am feeling more energetic than I have done for years having gone low carb / sugar. Took a few weeks before the change really boosted my energy, but am really noticing the difference now.

I had a lovely yoga class in the park - really noticing the reduction in body fat around the middle means I can do things more easily than I did before. I have a couple of friends coming over this afternoon for a walk and then we are going to the pub quiz with some others tonight, so I will be making the most of the sunshine.

Hope you all had a fab sunny Sunday afternoon xx

Morning lovely fabbers,

Thinking of you Ruby it sounds like a very difficult situation for you. Good advice on here especially with the eating for inner health, the right kind of food can really boost your energy without the dreaded sugar slumps and improve your state of mind no end.

We have had a lovely weekend here weather wise so plenty of time spent out in the garden, it's good exercise and gives such pleasure when you can sit back to enjoy the fruit of your labours.
Despite plenty of sunscreen I could see my fair, freckly skin was starting to burn at one point yesterday so retreated to the house, the dogs love having the doors open and they can wander in and out.
The warmer weather means more fabbing so painted my toe nails, a pretty pink colour that came in my No7 advent calendar and de-fuzzed my legs.
I could really do with some more summer skirts but am holding off as losing weight, half a stone so far which I am pleased with but my goal is to get down to a size 12 all over so suspect have another stone and a half to go. Although I have some lovely clothes sizes 14/16 and will be loathed to let them go
Re the high legs in M&S Indie I too like those but lately have switched to the high rise shorts and they are very comfortable, sit above the tummy and no vpl at all.