Mooloo's Joining up the dots in 2017

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  • Feral_Moon
    Feral_Moon Posts: 2,943 Forumite
    ivyleaf wrote: »
    Mooloo so sorry to hear about the change of hotel! Perhaps the one you booked is planning a refurbishment at that time?

    About the sewing lessons, have you considered asking for full payment when people book? After all, if someone has lessons at a local adult education place they are expected to pay the full amount when they sign up for the course :)
    If they have paid they are much more likely to take the trouble to turn up (or to nag their child to). And if they still don't, at least you haven't lost anything.

    Most courses I've ever looked at online require full payment up front with the facility to pay via PayPal on booking. Maybe is is something you could implement to prevent no shows.
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574
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    Yes, I try to get the funds up front. Problem was the booking was made over messenger. I will steer them to the website infuture or ask for BACS payment.
    I came home at lunchtime, staff stayed to keep the shop open. I did all the sewing but the zip jobs and what did come in today. Decided to leave it for Thursday and came home to declutter the kitchen and hang some curtains etc. However the curtains were too heavy for the poles and the bracket came off the wall so the old sari Ines are back up for now.
    I will need to get filler etc and probably have to make light weight Curtains and sell these lovely heavy ones on carboot sale. Was looking forward to the front room looking different tonight instead it just looks worse as the rail is wonky!
    On the plus side the kitchen is looking better, and I have decided to get rid of the deep fat fryer, and the slow cooker as I use my oven or the thermal cook bag. Didn't like cleaning the fryer so hardly used it. But I have cleaned it. I will see if it will sell for a few £
    If not I will free cycle it.
    Dgd is moaning about tummy aches and not eating her lunch, -and has promptly rated said lunch while I was defrosting her dinner!
    Kids!!
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574
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    Sold a pair of DGDs shoes her "nanna " bought her for Christmas as she will not wear pink sparkly shoes. £2 in her piggy bank is better!
    I also have potentially sold the slow cooker lining still boxed, and had interest in the slow cooker but the woman was an hours drive away, and no I can't deliver. I would use more petrol then the £5 asked! Why is she looking on a Brackley selling site if she lives an hour away?
    I have put the fryer on a freebie site. I will send it to the recycle centre if nobody wants it.
    I have a nice clean kitchen with worktop again and I managed to get most of the sitting room cleared of clothes etc before I came to babysit for Biggest.
    Noticed steam rising from my car bonnet when I got here, -so when its cold I better check the water level, the car was serviced just before Christmas and it is booked in for an MOT tomorrow. Please God it is not going to start going wrong with my having to drive to oxford at the weekend now.
    I still need to go to Mum's after here, and I would like to go to Aldi for a few things if possible before I go back to collect Dgd.
    BF is coming over tonight so I am hoping that he will help me sort out the curtain pole or at least arrange to do something about it soon!
    Dgs is fast asleep so this is a very easy baby sitting session-so far anyway.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Mooloo
    The heavy curtains may be ok if the pole has a baton put behind the length of it secured along the wall at regular intervals. Just on the brackets it's 1 or 2 screws holding all the weight of the fabric. My dad did this for me as I've just got rubbish plasterboard walls
    - Mortgage: 1st one down, 2nd also busted
    - Student Loan gone
    Swagbucks, Mingle, GiffGaff, Prolific, Qmee & Quidco; thank you MSE every little bit helps
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574
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    My neighbour's popped by to give me some jumpers that she doesn't want and has bought the curtains off of me. I think I will make some that stop above the radiator. So I won't have lost out on their cost. But I will need to think about that batton.
    Thanks
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574
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    Ok, I am in a total dilemma. Biggest rang me mid morning to tell me that DS's GF rang her in floods of hysterical tears that she had just found out that DS has not been paying their rent shortfall and the Housing are demanding £1500 ( just less), rent arrears to be paid immediately or they are commencing court order for eviction and recovery of said amounts by 14th March ( court date), with added fees of over £200 to be added if they get that far.
    DS would not discuss any thing with his GF while she screams at him Down the phone, as he was at work. I know that he had some work today as at 11.30 last night he text asking for a lift, and I had taken him there myself.
    I said that I would take him to the housing next week and see what their options are etc.
    I am not wanting to end up with additional debt from them but am concerned about what will happen to them if they are evicted. I am concerned that I would end up having to have them here, and I don't want to go down that road again. I am also concerned as to why DS has buried his head in the sand and not paid his rent after all the struggle etc not 6 months back was it?
    I know that I don't have to do anything and I could say tough! I could walk away and turn my back on them, except this is me here. The family Mrs Fixit, and my first instinct apart from to want to hit their heads together is to help.
    However I just had to move all my debts ( including their ones I took on), in to a card on 0% and I had a debt free date for June 2019.
    The deadline for moving dgd and myself to Oxford with BF if things continue to go well.
    I can't settle trying to think about what will happen if I don't help and what will happen to us if I do help financially as you know I am making every penny do the job of two as it is!
    I am currently thinking that I will need to drag him and coax her to a debt councillor and try to oversee the money possibly before they get their hands on it, but I have no legal rights to do that.
    I think I need to call EE and see what the options are for them.
    I am frustrated and feeling sick with worry.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • thorsoak
    thorsoak Posts: 7,166
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    MOOLOO .......DO NOT TAKE ON THEIR RESPONSIBILITY! NOT YOUR CIRCUS, NOT YOUR MONKEY! If you take this on, you will NEVER, EVER be free.

    DS has a father, GF has two parents (?) as I said before, you are only one wheel on their supportive wagon - which they should, if they are ever, going to be parents to their baby be dealing with themselves. Stop making excuses - she has mh problems, he has problems - we all have problems and they won't go away until they deal with them, themselves.

    xxxx
  • mellymoo74
    mellymoo74 Posts: 6,529
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    Mooloo

    Thorsoak is right.

    You were told because you will swoop in and fix it.
    Don't
    Tell them who they need to speak to (landlord to get a payment plan in place)
    Then leave them too it.

    They are never going to learn cos they don't reach rock bottom.

    It will be hard lovely but it's a lesson they need to learn
  • Carer
    Carer Posts: 296
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    I'm afraid I agree with the other posters. They will never learn if you bail them out yet again. They don't have to be responsible as there's always someone to bail them out.

    What would they do/how would they cope if you lived far away or even didn't exist?

    They may be evicted but they won't be made homeless as they have a child.
  • Mooloo

    Take him to the housing if you absolutely must, but that must be the end of your involvement.

    The pair of them are adults and parents so MUST be responsible for their actions. If you continue to bail them out they will never learn to take responsibility.

    DGD has to be your first priority and having them to stay with you or bailing them out (again!) does not put her first!

    If I was to be cynical this latest FUBAR seems to be particularly well timed after the recent vile accusations hurled at you by the pair of them.

    I know it's hard but you have to remain firm in your resolve otherwise it'll keep on happening.

    CS x
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