Looking for the silver lining

please-let-me-be-lucky · 27 October 2013 at 5:13PM

I'm sorry that you are having to deal with this now as well. I agree she is either rather self centred or she has had an upset herself and has wrongly taken it out on you. I'm not surprised you feel hurt.

You are doing a grand job and I admire you very much Xx

Dumyat · 27 October 2013 at 5:15PM

Ouch that must have hurt. Maybe she's done you a favour. If she's not going to be supportive at least you know now.

Keep plodding on SA...and well done on the exercise.

brizzledfw · 27 October 2013 at 6:45PM

Dumyat wrote: »

Ouch that must have hurt. Maybe she's done you a favour. If she's not going to be supportive at least you know now.

Keep plodding on SA...and well done on the exercise.

Seconded.

Keep on going SA..you are doing wonderfully and you are wonderful

X

*Robin* · 27 October 2013 at 6:50PM

Sun_Addict wrote: »

Do you know I was thinking along the same lines Robin. I wondered if she'd had a fall out with her hubby. I know he went out with his mates last night. Unlike her I haven't got the luxury of burying my head in the sand. I wouldn't mind but the only "support" I got from her other than verbal was a lift home from the hospital twice a week. When Mr SA was discharged for that week we never saw hide nor hair of her. She knew he was desperate to go to a park he likes and take the dog.

Hmm; sounds like she won't be much loss. If that call was a result of nothing more serious than a marital spat, then you're well shot of her.

You are doing such a great job of budgeting; wouldn't it be a good idea to start a new pot, marked Driving Lessons? Save until you have enough for an intensive course (far easier, quicker and more cost effective for anyone beyond the first flush of youth

).

Sun_Addict · 27 October 2013 at 9:12PM

Thanks so much all of you

Mr SA fine tonight. Eating and drinking well. His brother was there tonight and can't believe what sister said. He said hers is the sort of support you don't need.

Robin I failed my driving test years ago and stupidly didn't re-take it. I would have passed the second time as it was pure nerves that failed me. I guess I need refresher course. DD passed after intensive course - but before she had chance to buy car unfortunately had a seizure and was subsequently banned from driving. She's on epilepsy medication now though and has been cleared to drive again. Now she can't afford a car!

To put the final boot into my not so good day - I bought myself a small bottle of Rioja (the one glass size) to enjoy tonight watching the X Factor. Dropped it! Big sigh!!! I do like a drop of good Rioja! Literally in this case!!!

debtfreewannabe321 · 27 October 2013 at 10:57PM

Oh no to sil and dropped wine

I vote you buy a full size bottle next time it sounds like a well deserved treat! Xxx

amber03 · 27 October 2013 at 11:56PM

not very keen on SIL but like your BIL, its along journey you and Mr SA are on and you both need help. When my DF was ill earlier this year he just wanted my help and nobody elses help, he was a private person. I was completely exhausted and numb, I was pulled in all directions with my dad, family and friends. I quite often used to think, how come I am jumping from one drama to another whilst everybody else was just plodding along with their normal boring lives, that's all I wanted a normal boring life. Slowly I am getting a normal life still not quite boring yet but hopefully soon.

I feel for you SA and wish that soon you will have some sort of normal life. Mr SA will hopefully get the help he needs and deserves and you will get as much help as we can give you ,and loads of virtual hugs.xx

*Robin* · 28 October 2013 at 1:46AM

Sun_Addict wrote: »

Mr SA fine tonight. Eating and drinking well.

:beer:

Sun_Addict wrote: »

Robin I failed my driving test years ago and stupidly didn't re-take it. I would have passed the second time as it was pure nerves that failed me. I guess I need refresher course.

You did say earlier that it's been years since you last had lessons, which is why I thought an intensive course would give you the best chance to recall what you learned then - whilst also tackling the more difficult conditions drivers have to cope with on today's much busier roads.

Don't think it's a great idea to rely on DD being the family driver, tbh. Adult kids have their own lives; no matter how considerate, they do have a tendency to vanish at key moments..

Sun_Addict wrote: »

To put the final boot into my not so good day - I bought myself a small bottle of Rioja (the one glass size) to enjoy tonight watching the X Factor. Dropped it! Big sigh!!! I do like a drop of good Rioja! Literally in this case!!!

Ha - that proves it: watching X Factor must be bad for you! :cool:

Sun_Addict · 28 October 2013 at 1:38PM

Didn't get a lot of sleep last night. Got myself very upset I'm afraid and the crying gave me a blocked up nose! Quite angry with myself for letting it get to me so much. Still feel very down today. Feel very much on my own.

This might sound stroppy but I've decided to avoid SIL this week by going to the hospital early on the two days she visits so I'll have gone before she gets there. Won't be able to talk to her normally as if nothing has happened and I don't want her doing me the favour of a lift home - I can get the bus.

Do you know I thought I was doing alright until this happened - now it's made me look at things in a different light. Mr SA and I did everything together and didn't have any mutual friends we saw as a couple. When we met I had my set of friends and he had his. My friends nowadays tend to be people at work and old school/work friends who I keep in contact with but only see occasionally. And although the work friends are happy to listen to me and take me for a coffee/wine at lunchtime now and again, they're not my "after hours" friends. Everyone is busy getting on with their own lives, just like we were doing before this happened. When you work full time you don't have a lot of spare time on your hands. I was an only child so there are no siblings. I have cousins but none of them live in the same county. There is no one to knock on my door with a bottle of wine in their hand to cheer me up. And that's what I find so sad. So the moral of the tale is please don't neglect your friends.

Sorry about all the above I just needed to get it off my chest. Don't feel any better for it though! Guess I'm just feeling sorry for myself. I'm sure normal service will be resumed shortly!

beanielou · 28 October 2013 at 2:14PM

Big huggles.
If I was nearer I would come armed with wine.

Looking for the silver lining

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