When things hit rock bottom the only answer is to fight the way back up...

Hiddenidenity · 11 May 2017 at 12:15AM

Up late. I just can't seem to settle. Probably not helped by me and OH arguing over money. He's so selfish at times

I'll regret being up at this time upset when the alarm goes off in 4 hours. While he's been giving Zzz with not a care in the world.

Hiddenidenity · 11 May 2017 at 8:52AM

Morning jobs done, house nice and clean definitely makes me feel better getting it done early.

Two kids in school and youngest painting that should keep her quiet for a while.

Tonight's dinner is the curry that should have been made yesterday but we had jacket potato instead :rotfl: I couldn't be bothered making curry.

I'm waiting for the last bit of washing to dry then I can do my ironing while waiting in for the repair man. Then we've made plans to go for a coffee at my sisters tonight. Long story short I suffer from really bad anxiety and would happily never leave the house, this is a spiral of bad. Staying in makes me sad. Makes me feel like a failure and I'm not doing the best I can as a mum, but the anxiety makes leaving the house hard. Up until March when things literally hit rock bottom and I decided to seek help I hadn't left the house for 15 months other than hospital appointments and even those I'd cancel as many times as possible. Since March I've made the step to make sure I leave the house. Even if that's only the school run and going to my Mums or sisters for a catch up.

We have a consultant appointment on Monday with youngest and I don't think that's helping with my lack of sleep and worrying.

but it's got to be done and I can't change what will or has happened and I have to learn it's above my control.

[Deleted User] · 11 May 2017 at 11:13AM

You've been a busy bee this morning, fancy popping round to mine to do my washing and ironing? lol

Curry sounds lush, DH hates hm curry.

Small steps with the anxiety, take every day as it comes. You've done well since March xx

girlatplay · 11 May 2017 at 11:43AM

Hiddenidenity wrote: »

Also need to start a 'pot' for uniform as it's changing colours at the end of this school year so whole new sets needed for September term including p.e kit tha's got a logo :mad:

I have pots for everything! It so helps with my budgeting. I started building them when I got myself back on my feet and now I couldn't be without them.

Do the school have a second hand rail or something? I'm pretty sure LMG's primary school had something like that. They used to have a day before the school year started in the summer where you could go to the school and buy things off the rail.

I LOVE curry but I never seem to be able to make a homemade one taste nice

Tried and tried. My mum is pretty good at it but I'm just not.

PMO2's right. Small steps. Each day is an achievement. I try really hard not to worry about stuff that hasn't happened or is outwith my control. I'd rather stay in than go out too but it's coming into summer now and when the sun shines it makes it easier for me. I think about my vit D levels and think how much better I will feel for going out.

Hiddenidenity · 11 May 2017 at 11:48AM

Deleted_User wrote: »

You've been a busy bee this morning, fancy popping round to mine to do my washing and ironing? lol

Curry sounds lush, DH hates hm curry.

Small steps with the anxiety, take every day as it comes. You've done well since March xx

When I'm worrying (always :rotfl: ) I tend to take it out on the cleaning :rotfl:

girlatplay wrote: »

I have pots for everything! It so helps with my budgeting. I started building them when I got myself back on my feet and now I couldn't be without them.

Do the school have a second hand rail or something? I'm pretty sure LMG's primary school had something like that. They used to have a day before the school year started in the summer where you could go to the school and buy things off the rail.

I LOVE curry but I never seem to be able to make a homemade one taste nice Tried and tried. My mum is pretty good at it but I'm just not.

PMO2's right. Small steps. Each day is an achievement. I try really hard not to worry about stuff that hasn't happened or is outwith my control. I'd rather stay in than go out too but it's coming into summer now and when the sun shines it makes it easier for me. I think about my vit D levels and think how much better I will feel for going out.

I never could make curry 'right' until a blog I follow posted a recipe for a curry paste and recipe called curry in a hurry. The blog is mortgage free in three and brilliant for 'nice' food on a small budget. Now it's a firm favourite even by the little one who wouldn't touch curry any other time!

girlatplay · 11 May 2017 at 11:55AM

Hiddenidenity wrote: »

I never could make curry 'right' until a blog I follow posted a recipe for a curry paste and recipe called curry in a hurry. The blog is mortgage free in three and brilliant for 'nice' food on a small budget. Now it's a firm favourite even by the little one who wouldn't touch curry any other time!

Elaine's! I've tried it and I'm still rubbish

I'm not a bad cook, just not good at curry. I like her recipes, especially the tablet one!!

Hiddenidenity · 11 May 2017 at 11:58AM

girlatplay wrote: »

Elaine's! I've tried it and I'm still rubbish I'm not a bad cook, just not good at curry. I like her recipes, especially the tablet one!!

I miss her daily updates

I don't have social media and now the blog posts don't seem to happen anymore.

I've taken on quite a few of Elaine recipes, especially sweet ones

:rotfl:

girlatplay · 11 May 2017 at 12:22PM

Chinese braised ribs, yum!

Toni'sfriend · 11 May 2017 at 12:46PM

Well done on tackling the anxiety. Little steps at a time and you will get there. Do your family know the extent of your condition? I ask because a family member suffered severe anxiety and depression for years without anyone realizing and it was only when they sought help from the doctor that we realized what was going on and were able to give them support. When we found out it explained a lot and we were amazed and felt guilty that we hadn't realized sooner and saved them a lot of misery. I do hope you're getting all the support you need.

[Deleted User] · 11 May 2017 at 2:07PM

All this talk of food is making me hungry and I've just had my lunch!

When things hit rock bottom the only answer is to fight the way back up...

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