Restaurants. Must I pay for a miserable experience?

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  • i had a miserable day out with the wife, is that grounds for divorce? you ate the grub pay for it.
  • Robisere
    Robisere Posts: 3,237 Forumite
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    edited 10 October 2017 at 6:40PM
    Over the years my family and I have had regular birthday and other celebrations, in several different pubs/restaurants and 3 different towns, 2 different villages. This began when our children were younger and continued with grandchildren, who are now 24, 21, 18 and 11. At no time did any of those children cause a problem for others and they always enjoyed a good time. Now there are OH's, boy and girl friends, their friends and our friends, with their offspring. It's a bloomin' circus, says my wife, but we still ensure that we don't upset anyone else and we always have a great time. The venues love us! We have two favourite places which have outside play areas and conservatory areas, which we can book for our own "do". That way the young ones can run about outside as much as they wish, with the heartfelt comment from the parents of a boy with severe ADHD, that he is usually exhausted and sleeps well when they get him home. The kids have grown up knowing each other and the older ones look after the younger. This happens a lot in Lincolnshire towns and villages.

    Kids don't need to be a problem for others in order to have a good time in adult surroundings. It's all in the parenting and the boundaries they should have been taught to observe. A problem for children on the Autistic spectrum, it's true, but there are two of those in our family and another in our group of friends. They know they are surrounded by love and approval, that can become disapproval which they have learned to avoid.
    I think this job really needs
    a much bigger hammer.
  • peachyprice
    peachyprice Posts: 22,346 Forumite
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    It's easy, just leave 'em sat in yer car with a packet of crisps and a bottle of cheap orange. Didn't everyone do this when kids weren't allowed in pubs . . . . :whistle:

    Yep, didn't do us any harm :rotfl::rotfl:
    Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear
  • Yes, it is very true. Bright children tend to be badly behaved. They tend to run around more, be more argumentative and more 'into things' because they are interested in the world around them. Less intelligent kids are more willing to sit still.

    You take them on a picnic then.

    As has been said in the European countries the kids are brought up to behave appropriately.
  • bertiewhite
    bertiewhite Posts: 1,904 Forumite
    First Post
    Not sure about the legal side of not paying for the meal but you should certainly complain if any aspect of your experience is lacking, not just food.

    I took my wife to a local restaurant (as part of a hotel) for our anniversary a while back and specifically asked for a window seat as it looks out over the sea. The person taking the booking said that they would try to accommodate my request but they couldn't guarantee it. I asked if anybody else had booked before me and nobody else had, so they agreed that they could indeed honour my request.

    When I turned up, I was told I couldn't have a window table as there was only 2 of us and when I was led to the table they had reserved for us, my wife saw the waiter smirk and gesture towards us with one of the other waiters. Half an hour later, we noticed a couple were given a table (for four) next to the window overlooking the sea.

    I paid up and then went to see the hotel manageress who said she would investigate and get back to me. A couple of days later she rang to apologise and that she would be sending some vouchers as an apology.

    My point? Although the food was fine, it was also the experience I had booked (and been told I could have) and was paying for or I would have gone somewhere else in the first place.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    As has been said in the European countries the kids are brought up to behave appropriately.

    Exactly - if bright children can't be expected to sit still and children with health issues have to be left to run around, this would be the case in every country in the world but it isn't.

    It's parenting skills that are deficient here.
  • glentoran99
    glentoran99 Posts: 5,821 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post Debt-free and Proud!
    Sicard wrote: »
    A screaming child is indicative of bad parenting. None of my three ever screamed. Okay they navigated through the terrible twos but good parenting skills and distractions prevailed. There's not much you can do except shout 'shut up'. You should experience bad parenting with a brat on a ten-hour long haul.



    absolute and utter garbage, You may think you were a perfect parent but your sweeping generalisation is nonsense.
  • The-Truth
    The-Truth Posts: 483 Forumite
    Mehitabel wrote: »
    Many thanks for the input, all.

    To make the picture more complete, the sort of restaurants/pubs I'm talking about aren't billed as specially "family-friendly"

    Then don't go to a family friendly restaurant again then as you obviously aren't that family friendly!
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    absolute and utter garbage, You may think you were a perfect parent but your sweeping generalisation is nonsense.

    A screaming child doesn't mean the parents are bad - it's how they react to the child behaving that way that defines their parenting skills.
  • Sicard
    Sicard Posts: 851 Forumite
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    absolute and utter garbage, You may think you were a perfect parent but your sweeping generalisation is nonsense.


    I hit a nerve there, didn't I? That's usually connected to a guilt complex where the person reacts so vehemently to something that unsettles their own shortcomings.

    Look, unless a child is in pain or distressed because of some psychological reason ie parents rowing, either physical or sexual abuse or being overly spoiled then there is no reason for said child to scream and if it does the parent could stop this in a manner of ways. If they won't or can't do this there's a big parenting problem.

    And no I wasn't a perfect parent, there's no such animal. But my kids never screamed.
    You know what uranium is, right? It's this thing called nuclear weapons. And other things. Like lots of things are done with uranium. Including some bad things.
    Donald Trump, Press Conference, February 16, 2017

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