Which money issues do you hide from your partner?

Former_MSE_Debs
Former_MSE_Debs Posts: 890 Forumite
edited 14 January 2014 at 10:10PM in MoneySaving polls
Poll started 14 Jan 2014


Is it a question of sharing everything, or are finances something you keep secret

Which money issues do you ‘hide’ from (or not fully disclose to) your partner?



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Comments

  • aldredd
    aldredd Posts: 925 Forumite
    Interesting results.
    I'm married and handle most of the household finances. We maintain separate bank accounts, but am open about what we have and share the budget with my wife.
    Can't really imagine it any other way to be honest (other than shared bank account, sure we'll do that at some point!)
  • Woman living with partner here (getting married in November) and the one thing I don't tell my other half is how much I spend on clothes and beauty products. We don't have joint bank accounts but we share the budget on the big things like rent, bills and food and then the rest of our money is ours to do as we like. If he asked me I'd be happy to tell him though.
    "A mind needs books as a sword needs a whetstone, if it is to keep its edge." - Tyrion Lannister
    Married my best friend 1st November 2014
    Loose = the opposite of tight (eg "These trousers feel a little loose")
    Lose = the opposite of find/gain (eg "I'm going to lose weight this year")
  • It is amazing how many women keep money matters secret. Quite sad too.


    I was brought up by parents who said it is very important to be 100% honest about everything in a relationship but especially money. They had a joint bank account.


    When I met my husband to be we bought a flat together and I told him that if we're living together we have to be open and honest about money. We opened a joint bank account and at first also had our own bank accounts but after a few years we closed them and have always had just our joint account ever since.


    We always discuss big purchases first and everything's always been great over money. We celebrate 25 years of marriage this year!
  • BobbinAlong
    BobbinAlong Posts: 195 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post
    edited 15 January 2014 at 7:48PM
    I'm living with my partner but we've both been through the marriage and divorce mill and having only joint accounts with ready spending ex's was the biggest problem for both of us in our marriages.

    I now always advise couples to keep separate bank accounts and share expenditure otherwise arguments about "who spent all the money" can result.

    Now we have our separate accounts, I own the house outright and we share expenditure and are comfortable but not well off. Finances aren't a secret but aren't a problem either but we don't need to share every detail.
  • stevemcol
    stevemcol Posts: 1,666 Forumite
    One current account. Everthing shared, simple. Couldn't imagine doing it any other way.
    Apparently I'm 10 years old on MSE. Happy birthday to me...etc
  • seven-day-weekend
    seven-day-weekend Posts: 36,755 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary Photogenic First Post
    edited 16 January 2014 at 9:31AM
    We don't hide anything financial from each other, although I deal with it all. My husband probably wouldn't know what Direct Debits go from the joint account, but that's because he doesn't care as long as I have dealt with it. :)

    We have separate savings accounts but the amounts in these are not secret either.

    (female, married over 40 years).
    (AKA HRH_MUngo)
    Member #10 of £2 savers club
    Imagine someone holding forth on biology whose only knowledge of the subject is the Book of British Birds, and you have a rough idea of what it feels like to read Richard Dawkins on theology: Terry Eagleton
  • iris
    iris Posts: 1,384 Forumite
    Name Dropper Combo Breaker First Post First Anniversary
    We also don't hide anything financial from each other, although I deal with it all, as I enjoy the challenge of getting as much interest for our money as possible :)

    We have separate savings accounts (Premium Bonds, ISAs and S&SISAs), we also have separate current accounts (to take advantage of interest rates), but the amounts in these are not secret either.


    Money has never been an issue between us and certainly never anything to hide or argue about.


    I have had a bank account since I was 17. Current accounts in those days had a yearly charge and as I was paid monthly by cheque, my employers paid my yearly bank account charges;)

    (female, married over 50 years)
  • Everything goes into the household accounts except the detail of my credit card bill. But the total of that goes in and DH knows roughly what its spent on, I just would rather not feel "watched" on such spending (DH rarely spends money that isn't reclaimed as expenses unless we're out together/as a family as I'm a stay at home parent and do all the running around).
    "Every single person has at least one secret that would break your heart. If we could just remember this, I think there would be a lot more compassion and tolerance in the world."
    — Frank Warren
  • tattycath
    tattycath Posts: 7,175 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post
    We don't hide anything from each other.
    We do have separate accounts but it's 'our' money .
    GE 36 *MFD may 2043
    MFIT-T5 #60 £136,850.30
    Mortgage overpayments 2019 - £285.96
    2020 Jan-£40-feb-£18.28.march-£25
    Christmas savings card 2020 £20/£100
    Emergency savings £100/£500
    12/3/17 175lb - 06/11/2019 152lb
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