Waiting for a proposal - how did you stay sane?!

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  • Keen_Young_Learner
    Keen_Young_Learner Posts: 60 Forumite
    I got engaged last week! 1 week and 1 day ago, your original message could have been from me. I was so impatient and I felt like "this is the most important decision of our lives, why is it his decision alone when it happens?"

    BUT

    When he proposed, my OH told me that it had taken so long because he and my best friend had been designing and commissioning a bespoke ring for me for the past six months! He had been waitinf die ring to be completed. Of course, I wasn't to know that this was what the hold up was, and that he was as impatient as I was! I'm sure that all will become clear once it happens 😉
    KYLxx
  • irishwench69
    irishwench69 Posts: 807 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    irishwench69 wrote: »
    So I've been lurking since this thread started, but maybe it's time for me to finally add my story. I've been with my OH for nearly 11 years (it's our 11th anniversary on the 27th July)

    [/snip]

    If we wait for the "perfect time", what if that never happens? While I love him dearly and can't imagine not being with him, being his "girlfriend" after 11 years just seems so......trite. I want to be his wife, out there, loud and proud!

    Wanted to come back and give an update.....I am now engaged!!! :j:D:lovethoug:happyhear:happyhear:grinheart:heart::happylove:smileyhea

    My fiance took me on a suprise trip to Lyon.....and after a couple of days of wining, dining and lazy wanderings around the markets (we're both big foodies), he persuaded me we needed to take a VERY early morning walk (cue grumbling from me - not the biggest morning person ever!), where in the private grounds of the Basillica (beautiful btw!), watching the sunrise over Lyon, he dropped to one knee. So so happy right now - keep looking down at my hand and grinning like a loon.

    Ring picture attached (sorry for the big pic!!):

    os51d4.jpg
    It is a vintage design which he had resized and engraved - LOVE!

    Anyway, we've been together over 14 years, so some hope for those of you still waiting. If it is meant to be, keep the faith.

    IW x
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  • heartbreak_star
    heartbreak_star Posts: 8,286 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Combo Breaker Rampant Recycler
    Squarehead, I think you may have missed the point of the thread - it's quite lighthearted and some of us have been with our partners 5 or 10 years :) that said, I agree with the posters who've said have a chat to your ladyfriend about it. Maybe she's just super happy with you :)

    Irish, Zephyr, Kitty...CONGRATULATIONS!!

    HBS x
    "I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another."

    "It's easy to know what you're against, quite another to know what you're for."

    #Bremainer
  • heartbreak_star
    heartbreak_star Posts: 8,286 Forumite
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    My ex got engaged. He's lovely and I'm very happy for him, but a bit sad for me haha!

    HBS x
    "I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another."

    "It's easy to know what you're against, quite another to know what you're for."

    #Bremainer
  • cashewnut
    cashewnut Posts: 362 Forumite
    First Anniversary
    heartbreak_star wrote: »
    My ex got engaged. He's lovely and I'm very happy for him, but a bit sad for me haha!

    HBS x

    Have you spoken about marriage to your OH any more HBS?
  • chicacherrycola
    chicacherrycola Posts: 59 Forumite
    Christmas, our 11th anniversary, new year, my 30th birthday have all very recently come and gone and still nothing.

    I had a bit of a meltdown on NYE as I was convinced he would do it last year but actually didn't.

    Maybe this year???!
  • Strawberry_pi
    Strawberry_pi Posts: 1 Newbie
    I'm getting married next Saturday. My OH and I have been together 20 years (and 16 days!). We've lived together for over 19 years and have three children.
    I hinted, then said directly that I would like to be proposed to (by the 'direct speaking' stage we'd been together over 12 years). He said he wanted to but would do so in his own time.
    Last year on February 29th, the children and I proposed to him.

    Lesson learnt: some people are lovely but are never going to ask, however much you'd like them to. Solution: consider doing it yourself.
  • heartbreak_star
    heartbreak_star Posts: 8,286 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Combo Breaker Rampant Recycler
    cashewnut wrote: »
    Have you spoken about marriage to your OH any more HBS?

    He doesn't seem as averse as he was, in fact he thinks it would be a nice idea sometime :)

    HBS x
    "I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another."

    "It's easy to know what you're against, quite another to know what you're for."

    #Bremainer
  • kirtsypoos
    kirtsypoos Posts: 3,824 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Combo Breaker Cashback Cashier
    I'm so pleased I've come across this thread! I thought I was quite mad :o

    Have been with OH coming up 4 years, have just purchased our second home together and (time pressured due to some medical issues) we will be trying for a family this year.

    We agreed when we got together that we both wanted to be married before children. We still agree on this, but he does not get the time issue that we have now. If he was to propose and us to be married before a child is born there is a chance I would be pregnant when getting married, which isn't what I want at all - and he says neither does he!

    He's very stubborn and has said that because I've brought it up (twice, and only to see if we were both still on the same page about marriage before kids) he won't be proposing anytime soon because he feels pressured :mad:

    Friends who have been together 8 months recently got engaged and already have their wedding date set and it devastated me. Which is so selfish I know, I just feel really upset.

    All these milestones have passed and we are no closer to what we agreed on. He wanted to live together beforehand so we moved in together. Then he wanted to buy a house first so we bought a house, then he wanted to sell up and buy a bigger house ready to have a family, which we have now done and still nothing....

    I feel better having vented here though, wonderful thread and it has given me hope reading the 'success' stories :o
    :j PAID VERY, Barclaycard x3, Vanquis, Natwest, O/D, Tesco & MBNA x2 PAID :j LBM 24/07/15 - Original Debt: £0/31010.23 (100% paid) :eek:
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  • leslieknope
    leslieknope Posts: 334 Forumite
    little rant here.... i don't necessarily want to get married. i've never been someone who likes to be centre of attention. but it's disheartening that after 3 1/2 years together, my OH doesn't even seem to be considering it. it feels like everyone else has progressed so much more in their relationships than we have :( we don't even live together, although that is more money related than anything else. hopefully to change in the summer! and maybe he doesn't feel like that is a viable step until we are living together. but as sad as it sounds, it would still be nice to get a ring just to seal the deal that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me even if we're not bothered about having a big wedding and party.

    i'm not even that expensive! saw an engagement ring on etsy for £100 that i loved! :cool:
    CCCC #33: £42/£240
    DFW: £4355/£4405
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