Probationary period - failing to meet job

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Comments

  • paulofessex
    paulofessex Posts: 1,728 Forumite
    Perhaps he needs to have a indepth discussion with a total independent person about how he sees his employment future and to try and get a clear understanding of the direction he really want to move towards, would an outside job suit more. As far as l know there is no Careers service for adults as there is for youngsters.

    As Valos mentioned above may be your partner is feeling overwhelmed, or could he in fact be suffering from depression? Would he talk to the GP?

    I wish you both the very best
  • epatolles
    epatolles Posts: 192 Forumite
    He can't be that useless if he got you pregnant!

    Hi, have you looked outside at all of the scum spawning? getting someone pregnant is not that hard!

    no offence to the op of course but ^ they are being an idiot...

    anyway it might not be very supportive but my ex was like this... an absolute waste of oxygen...
    he didn't speak unless his parents told him he could and when he did speak he was also a bumbling idiot! he had no confidence whatsoever in the real world... but when he was with me and his friends he was a different person! in hindsight its probably his parents fault he was like that because his dad was a complete ogre and shouted him and the rest of his family down all the time... think i was a challenge for his dad because i NEVER back down when i know im right :-)

    anyway dont feel like you NEED to be with him for the baby! give him time but remember you are your own person and if he is causing you this much upset you CAN cope by yourself!

    - don't want to be all pro-single parenting or anything its just a lot of people stick at a relationship when they are unhappy because of their own fears!
  • jdturk
    jdturk Posts: 1,636 Forumite
    If the OP is so great why don't you go get the full time job and let your OH become a stay at home Dad?

    Its hard enough getting/keeping a job when your OH is supportive but when they aren't...wow its struggle!
    Always ask ACAS
  • Mov
    Mov Posts: 21 Forumite
    jdturk wrote: »
    If the OP is so great why don't you go get the full time job and let your OH become a stay at home Dad?

    Its hard enough getting/keeping a job when your OH is supportive but when they aren't...wow its struggle!

    JDTURK - why don't you READ the posts before passing your stupid comments.
    Idiot
  • jdturk
    jdturk Posts: 1,636 Forumite
    Mov wrote: »
    JDTURK - why don't you READ the posts before passing your stupid comments.
    Idiot

    Thanks for the sweeping statement....(see above!)

    My point was here you are slating your OH for being crap, you are properly slaughtering him on a forum where he cannot defend himself and here you are not even thinking about going full time.

    If you are such a good 'bread winner' you look for the full time job and let him go part time
    Always ask ACAS
  • I think your OH may need helprather than punishment. Definately a chat with the GP as others have suggested. There are many very subtle conditions which can cause some of the problems you have described. One being aspbegers which many very intelligent people are said to have eg bill gates do a search on adult asbergers (sorry can't post a link as a newby) It can make sufferers seem like social buffoons. Haven't got enough information from your post but many people are struggling through life without realising what's wrong which can be very distressing for themselves and their families.
  • Mov
    Mov Posts: 21 Forumite
    jdturk - Oh do shut up you idiot. I am not vaguely interested in anything you have to say so GO AWAY and annoy someone else

    Strongbowgirl - thanks for your well meant advice. My husband does not have aspergers or any other mental illness. He is just bad at his job simple as that. There is no point making excuses for him
  • I think your OH may need helprather than punishment. Definately a chat with the GP as others have suggested. There are many very subtle conditions which can cause some of the problems you have described. One being aspbegers which many very intelligent people are said to have eg bill gates do a search on adult asbergers (sorry can't post a link as a newby) It can make sufferers seem like social buffoons. Haven't got enough information from your post but many people are struggling through life without realising what's wrong which can be very distressing for themselves and their families.

    Aspergers was going through my mind as well, think it would be worth investigating this, as it sounds as if your OH may have some of the traits, I am no expert, but have a friend with a child who has this. It has a broad range of traits and levels. As for the OP, you sound like you are having a really tough time, it can feel like the last straw when you are pregnant and wanting support for youself to be in the position of being the one who has to give it. You have practical worries too re finances and no one could blame you for being hacked off. If coming on this forum helps to off load your feelings and makes it easier to cope in the "real" world then that is a good thing. I really hope you can make some headway, good luck and take care
  • Mov
    Mov Posts: 21 Forumite
    Thanks yellowduck - i know you mean well with the aspergers. But without giving too much away about myself, I work with people with Aspergers! So I KNOW that my OH does not come under the autistic spectrum in any way. Thank you though.
    I have told all my friends what is going on as I am very much of the attitude that it is best to be open and honest (though obv am keeping the thoughts about leaving my OH secret for now). I can't really speak to them at the moment though as I am too upset. Was really just looking for practical advice on this forum......
    Thanks
  • inmypocketnottheirs
    inmypocketnottheirs Posts: 4,745
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    edited 18 March 2010 at 11:55AM
    Mov wrote: »
    JDTURK - why don't you READ the posts before passing your stupid comments.
    Idiot

    Think this shows a lot about the OP.
    Mov wrote: »
    jdturk - Oh do shut up you idiot. I am not vaguely interested in anything you have to say so GO AWAY and annoy someone else
    And this even more.
    Don't lie, thieve, cheat or steal. The Government do not like the competition.
    The Lord Giveth and the Government Taketh Away.
    I'm sorry, I don't apologise. That's just the way I am. Homer (Simpson)
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